Hello minister,<\/p>\n
I write this with great desperation and anguish. About four years ago, I met my boyfriend. We started very well. He was very submissive to God, too, but it got to a point where we slowly fell into fornication. Every time that it happened, I got depressed and felt guilty for failing God. He also felt very sad. We always said that we were not going to fornicate, and we went back to fornication.<\/p>\n
Now he has proposed to me, and the wedding is scheduled to take place in a few months. We have not continued fornicating. We have moved away from sin, but I feel doubts about whether to marry or not because we sinned before. It make me distrust him and think that if he could not wait for me until the right time, will he be able to abstain when temptation comes?<\/p>\n
I am very sorry, and I have promised God never to fornicate again. He also has a purpose of fasting and prayer so that God forgives his sin and that our marriage is holy. He tells me that God forgives us of our sins. I have told him if you fail me by committing adultery in our marriage, you will also think that God forgives you, and that’s it? He replied that he was sorry for failing God and that we had relationships in love not only for a moment but that we wanted to respect God and that we would not do it again.<\/p>\n
Should we get married? Or do we separate?<\/p>\n
Thank you very much, God bless you.<\/p>\n\t
I’m puzzled. Why are you holding your boyfriend to a higher standard than you hold yourself? It takes two people to commit fornication. You question whether he will remain faithful after marriage, but we could also ask whether you will remain faithful after marriage. You claim not to trust him, but you were equally involved. Should we ask whether he should trust you?<\/p>\n
What you tell me is that both of you regret your sins and that you have stopped having sex. You are now planning to get married. All of these things are good and proper. I fail to see how separating will improve your lives.<\/p>\n
When God states that He forgives the sins of Christians, that promise is trustworthy. “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness<\/em>” (I John 1:9). What more are you looking for? The two of you stopped committing fornication. You are in the process of changing your lives. “For behold what earnestness this very thing, this godly sorrow, has produced in you: what vindication of yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what avenging of wrong! In everything you demonstrated yourselves to be innocent in the matter<\/em>” (II Corinthians 7:11). Why are you trying to impose more requirements than what God has stated?<\/p>\n\t Question: Hello minister, I write this with great desperation and anguish. About four years ago, I met my boyfriend. We started very well. He was very submissive to God, too, but it got to a point where we slowly fell into fornication. Every time that it happened, I got depressed and felt guilty for failing…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[1572],"class_list":["post-82796","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-fornication"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":9942,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/if-i-had-sex-with-someone-does-that-mean-we-cant-get-married\/","url_meta":{"origin":82796,"position":0},"title":"If I had sex with someone, does that mean we can’t get married?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 19, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I am a born-again Christian with a history of having multiple sexual partners (main chick and side-chicks). I got saved and gave my life to Christ, though I still could not control my sexual desires; hence, I continued to practice fornication. I repented and changed but ended up having\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":17029,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/dont-you-realize-that-there-would-be-no-children-if-people-didnt-fornicate\/","url_meta":{"origin":82796,"position":1},"title":"Don’t you realize that there would be no children if people didn’t fornicate?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 19, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I believe your site is awful because when a young girl asks an honest worried opinion about sex or fornication or whatever you continue to say how disappointed you are in them. We all realize that having sex is a sin, but do you realize that there would be\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":69388,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-marry-the-man-ive-already-had-sex-with\/","url_meta":{"origin":82796,"position":2},"title":"Should I marry the man I’ve already had sex with?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 19, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello there! I am emailing because I've been in turmoil this past month. Recently, I've felt that the Lord has strengthened my conviction to follow him. I plan on hopefully being baptized by the end of the year. My church is very Protestant; they believe in purity, and I've\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":34076,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-i-have-to-break-off-my-engagement-because-we-committed-fornication\/","url_meta":{"origin":82796,"position":3},"title":"Do I have to break off my engagement because we committed fornication?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 18, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I need advice, please. I had been living as a born-again Christian for over a year before I fell into sin and committed fornication. I met the guy a year after my baptism and we were engaged a few months later; we are both in our thirties. He\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":43306,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-want-to-stop-committing-fornication-but-ive-lost-control\/","url_meta":{"origin":82796,"position":4},"title":"I want to stop committing fornication, but I’ve lost control","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 6, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I want to stop fornicating. I have always prayed that I want to get married to the man I would be dating for the first time, and I thank God for giving me that. I have been with this guy for eight years, but my problem is that at\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":46639,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-i-tell-my-girlfriend-that-i-slept-with-her-sister\/","url_meta":{"origin":82796,"position":5},"title":"Do I tell my girlfriend that I slept with her sister?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"December 7, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Please sir, I strongly believe that it is not good to fornicate, but I did this some days ago. I've regretted what I've done. I want to start dating a woman whom I would like to marry, but the fact is that she is the sister of the girl\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/82796","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=82796"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/82796\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=82796"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=82796"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=82796"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Response:<\/h2>\nThank you very much for your words of encouragement and reflection.\nI ask for your prayers for our lives and a marriage of blessing.\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"