by Doy Moyer<\/p>\n
True friendship is valued. When we choose a friend, we believe there is a significance to the relationship that is mutually beneficial. We share in a fellowship and desire to be with each other and enjoy one another’s company. Friendship is no light matter, then, because there is great influence attached to it. We are taught to choose our friends wisely, which is sound advice. “He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm<\/em>” (Proverbs 13:20).<\/p>\n We would not normally think that having one friend necessarily means that we cannot have other friends. Most of the time, friends are not mutually exclusive. We are used to having multiple friends, some much closer than others. However, there may be times when choosing one friend means choosing not to befriend an enemy. We understand that in the political realm. If someone is closely allied with an enemy of the state, we can immediately see problems. In other cases, we may see that befriending someone who presents temptations and problems needs to be avoided. We need to be wise about being around people and the influences they exert (cf. I Corinthians 15:33).<\/p>\n The book of James contrasts God’s wisdom with worldly wisdom. God’s wisdom is pure, peaceable, gentle, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, and without hypocrisy. Worldly wisdom is earthly, sensual, and demonic. It is full of jealousy, selfish ambition, disorder, and every evil thing (James 3:13-18). If we want to know whether we are dealing with God’s wisdom or worldly wisdom, look at the fruit that comes from it. “You will know them by their fruits<\/em>.”<\/p>\n James 4 shows the nature of worldly wisdom. Note the terms connected to it: quarrels, conflicts, “your pleasures<\/em>,” lust, murder, envy, fighting, wrong motives, hostility, and so on. He summarizes this with strong warnings: “You adulteresses, do you not know that friendship with the world is hostility toward God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God<\/em>” (James 4:4).<\/p>\n Whereas God’s wisdom makes for peace, worldly wisdom creates quarrels. It manifests the works of the flesh (Galatians 5:19-21). Selfish ambition destroys peace. Selfish pleasures wage war against the soul. Wrong motives seek to spend whatever we get on our own desires. At the root of strife is envy and lust. Every evil thing comes from worldly wisdom. This is the wisdom the world promotes as it seeks to slake its lustful thirst at the fountain of greed and selfishness. There is no peace or no ultimate satisfaction in seeking only to satisfy oneself. One can only arrive at the same conclusion as Qoheleth: “Thus I considered all my activities which my hands had done and the labor which I had exerted, and behold all was vanity and striving after the wind and there was no profit under the sun<\/em>” … “So I hated life, for the work which had been done under the sun was grievous to me; because everything is futility and striving after the wind<\/em>” (Ecclesiastes 2:11, 17).<\/p>\n Friendship with the world is ugly once it is stripped bare of its embellishments. It is hostility and enmity toward God and others. It shows contempt toward God’s mercy and grace through Jesus. It high-handedly brushes God off in favor of one’s own desires. To choose friendship with the world is to choose to be God’s enemy. This is indeed a mutually exclusive situation, for no one can serve two masters (cf. Matthew 6:24-34).<\/p>\n God doesn’t give up easily on us. Even when we seek our own pleasures, God reaches out with opportunities to draw near to Him. The Spirit, dwelling in His people, is zealous for us. God reaches out with “greater grace,” offering reconciliation with those who would humble themselves before Him (James 4:5-7). Humility is key. Worldly wisdom opposes God because it is grounded in pride. We somehow think that we know how to order our lives — in a disorderly way, ironically (see James 3:16 again). We couldn’t be further from the truth.<\/p>\n God is opposed to the proud, and the proud are opposed to Him. We are presented with a choice of resisting God or resisting the devil. The devil offers no grace; he gives no quarter to those who seek refuge in his evil. He prowls like a roaring lion seeking to devour his prey (I Peter 5:8). Humility submits to God and resists the devil, making the devil flee. There is something about our friendship with God that scares the devil away. Stay close to God, and the devil won’t stand a chance.<\/p>\n God’s wisdom draws us near to Him. “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you<\/em>.” This requires humility and purity. “Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded” (James 4:8). God’s wisdom is first pure. Instead of being torn by what the world offers, causing us to doubt, we must single-mindedly devote ourselves to God’s will. Don’t let the frivolity of the world fool you. The devil is not your friend, no matter what promises of glamour he makes. Choose friendship with God!<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" by Doy Moyer True friendship is valued. When we choose a friend, we believe there is a significance to the relationship that is mutually beneficial. We share in a fellowship and desire to be with each other and enjoy one another’s company. Friendship is no light matter, then, because there is great influence attached to…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[27],"tags":[579,609],"class_list":["post-82350","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-article","tag-friendship","tag-worldliness"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":37601,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/friends\/","url_meta":{"origin":82350,"position":0},"title":"Friends","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 5, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Psalms 119:57-64 \u00a0 I.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0You can tell much about a person by the friends he keeps \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0A.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cWait a minute! I\u2019m my own person!\u201d \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0B.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Perhaps, but outside our family, our friends hold a strong influence in our lives \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0C.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0You can\u2019t choose your family, but the people you\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Audio"","block_context":{"text":"Audio","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/audio\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":26265,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/making-friends\/","url_meta":{"origin":82350,"position":1},"title":"Making Friends","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 1, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Text: Proverbs 18:24 (KJV or NKJV) \u00a0 I.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0I received a note from a fourteen year old boy. He has moved a lot in his short life, attending ten different schools. The school he is currently attending was the first one where he stayed for more than one year. But it\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Sermon"","block_context":{"text":"Sermon","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/sermon\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":9687,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-you-make-friends\/","url_meta":{"origin":82350,"position":2},"title":"How do you make friends?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 8, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I wanted to ask you a question. I am kind of maybe what you call shy. Maybe because of the ten schools I have been through in my school life. Every year it has been a new school, but that stopped last year. Students in my class talk to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":6946,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-married-couples-stay-in-touch-on-a-regular-basis-with-an-ex-boyfriend-or-ex-girlfriend\/","url_meta":{"origin":82350,"position":3},"title":"Should married couples stay in touch on a regular basis with an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 20, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Should married couples stay in touch on a regular basis with an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend?\u00a0 And what if the friend is also married? Answer: Does a person's likes and dislikes in particular personalities change just because they become married? If I really enjoyed golf and had a group of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":61473,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/notes-on-friends\/","url_meta":{"origin":82350,"position":4},"title":"Notes on Friends","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"June 19, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Examples I Samuel 18:1-4; 20:4-7 Jonathan and David Ruth 1:16 Ruth and Naomi Acts 18:3 Aquila, Priscilla, and Paul Nature Joshua 1:5 \"No man shall be able to stand before you all the days of your life; as I was with Moses, so I will be with you. I will\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Notes"","block_context":{"text":"Notes","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/notes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":58064,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/mark-twains-cat\/","url_meta":{"origin":82350,"position":5},"title":"Mark Twain\u2019s Cat","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 19, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"by Forrest D. Moyer, 1984 Mark Twain once said: \"We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - and stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on the hot stove lid. She will never sit down on\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Article"","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-content\/uploads\/2007\/01\/CatOnStove-300x200.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/82350","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=82350"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/82350\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=82350"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=82350"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=82350"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}