{"id":81445,"date":"2024-12-10T16:33:16","date_gmt":"2024-12-10T22:33:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=81445"},"modified":"2024-12-11T10:47:11","modified_gmt":"2024-12-11T16:47:11","slug":"do-we-cut-ties-with-family-members-who-are-not-members-of-the-church","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-we-cut-ties-with-family-members-who-are-not-members-of-the-church\/","title":{"rendered":"Do We Cut Ties with Family Members Who Are Not Members of the Church?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\t<h2>Question:<\/h2>\n<p>Hello Sir,<\/p>\n<p>I have a question that maybe you can help me to understand.<\/p>\n<p>I attend a Church of Christ, and in my youngest daughter&#8217;s Bible class, she is being told we must cut off contact with family members who are not members of the church.<\/p>\n<p>I have two older children who are off and on their own. They are great kids, good moral children (at least to the world&#8217;s standards). They do not disrespect my rules in my home when they come around (which isn&#8217;t too often) to visit, nor do they demean or disrespect our faith; they are very respectful and often will gladly hear and engage in any faith-based talks we have. I give you this background so you understand our relationship&#8217;s dynamic. I will see my oldest daughter when schedules permit or at holiday family events. My question is, do I have to cut contact with them and not invite them over for holiday events, out for an occasional lunch, or out to Christmas shop together? My youngest is being told we have to cut them off because they are not members of the church.<\/p>\n<p>I know, of course, to put God first; I don&#8217;t question that. I pray every day without ceasing for my two older kids to come to Christ, give their lives to him, and follow him with pure obedience. I guess I am concerned that if I cut them out of my life, how can I be an example of a good Christian? They will no longer see our examples. If they don&#8217;t visit or spend time with us, our faith-based talks will be nonexistent. What if one of those would have been the talk that pricked their hearts? I try to plant seeds where I can and encourage them. I&#8217;m just at a loss. This is not the first time the church has put this in our ears. I need some sound doctrine and clarification on how to handle this. If this is what we are to do, then so be it. God comes first.<\/p>\n<p>Thank you for your time.<\/p>\n\t<h2>Answer:<\/h2>\n<p>Let&#8217;s look at the command in its context:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>&#8220;<em>I wrote you in my letter not to associate with immoral people; I did not at all mean with the immoral people of this world, or with the covetous and swindlers, or with idolaters, for then you would have to go out of the world. But actually, I wrote to you not to associate with any so-called brother if he is an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler&#8211;not even to eat with such a one. For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are within the church? But those who are outside, God judges. Remove the wicked man from among yourselves<\/em>&#8221; (I Corinthians 5:9-13).<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Paul&#8217;s concern is about showing acceptance of people who call themselves Christian but clearly do not live the Christian life. I&#8217;m assuming that your two older children have not become Christians in the way that the Bible defines Christianity. Your association with them does not promote immoral practices. This is not the sort of situation Paul was discussing. Paul is dealing with immoral people who call themselves Christians and who have been withdrawn from by the church because of their sins.<\/p>\n<p>One expects a parent to have dealings with his children. People realize that we have to deal with bosses and employees, school teachers, community leaders, etc. Most will not be members of the church. So long as my dealings with them do not promote sin, I do my best to represent Christ. Ask those who advocate isolating non-Christian family members if they insist that people quit their jobs if their employers are not Christians. &#8220;<em>All who are under the yoke as slaves are to regard their own masters as worthy of all honor so that the name of God and our doctrine will not be spoken against. Those who have believers as their masters must not be disrespectful to them because they are brethren, but must serve them all the more, because those who partake of the benefit are believers and beloved. Teach and preach these principles<\/em>&#8221; (I Timothy 6:1-2). Paul taught us that we should treat non-Christian bosses honorably. Why are they advocating a different set of rules simply because people are family members?<\/p>\n\t<h2>Response:<\/h2>\n<p>Thank you! I appreciate your time.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Question: Hello Sir, I have a question that maybe you can help me to understand. I attend a Church of Christ, and in my youngest daughter&#8217;s Bible class, she is being told we must cut off contact with family members who are not members of the church. I have two older children who are off&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[173,254],"class_list":["post-81445","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-family","tag-withdrawal"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":95334,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/visitor-or-member\/","url_meta":{"origin":81445,"position":0},"title":"Visitor or Member?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 30, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"by Terry Wane Benton Many congregations are made up of workers who pitch in to help the local church grow in edification and meaningful fellowship in the work and worship of God. They try to be involved in teaching classes, preparing communion, cleaning the building, hosting meals for other members,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Article&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4015,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/what-can-the-church-do-for-widows\/","url_meta":{"origin":81445,"position":1},"title":"What can the church do for widows?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 6, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I am interested in knowing what can the church do for the widows? There is a lady who is a widow and a member of the Lord's church.\u00a0 She has five grown children. Can the church pay for her husband's funeral out of the treasury? What if all members\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":45711,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/on-drifting-away-from-the-faith\/","url_meta":{"origin":81445,"position":2},"title":"On Drifting Away from the Faith","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 26, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"by Terry Wane Benton If we surveyed churches that declined in attendance because of COVID, we may find an alarming number of brethren who fell or are in process of drifting further away. I remember thinking a long time ago that should persecution arise in our country, and it was\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Article&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":58922,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-stop-my-fellowship-with-family-members-who-are-not-members-of-the-church\/","url_meta":{"origin":81445,"position":3},"title":"Should I stop my fellowship with family members who are not members of the church?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 11, 2023","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I am a member of the church of Christ. I have had many discussions with my family who are not members of the church. Most of them are Baptists and a few are Nazarenes. Most debates are over baptism. The last one ended with raised angry voices. Should I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":27182,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/why-is-the-church-both-the-body-of-christ-and-the-bride-of-christ\/","url_meta":{"origin":81445,"position":4},"title":"Why is the church both the body of Christ and the bride of Christ?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 10, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Please, why is the church called the body of Christ and at the same time called the bride of Christ? Thanks. Answer: People are known by a variety of names and titles because one name doesn't completely describe a person or his relationship with other people. I'm known as\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":12727,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-does-god-view-switching-congregations\/","url_meta":{"origin":81445,"position":5},"title":"How does God view switching congregations?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 10, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Good morning, Mr. Jeffrey! My husband and I have decided to switch our church membership to another local body of believers. God says that He places each member how He sees fit (I Corinthians 12:18), but I cannot find a biblical reference to how God moves people to different\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81445","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=81445"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/81445\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=81445"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=81445"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=81445"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}