Alright, sir.<\/p>\n
I slept with my lover’s friend. Truth be told, I don’t know how it happened because he bothered me before and I refused. I even told my man about him and actions were taken, but I don’t know how I succumbed. Everything happened in a flash, and I’m wondering why, after refusing, all of sudden I agreed. I really don’t know how everything happened. I’m really confused.<\/p>\n\t
If you don’t know and you were there, the odds that I’m going to accurately explain what happened is not high. But there are a few things we need to discuss.<\/p>\n
By calling your current boyfriend your “lover,” you are implying that you are having sex with a man without being married. Fornication is a sin (Hebrews 13:4). Thus, you are not upset that you are violating God’s law, but that you committed fornication with multiple men. But that is the nature of sin — it tends to progress from bad to worse.<\/p>\n
You mentioned that this second man had been trying to get you to have sex with him for a while. You trusted in your ability to say “no” to him, but you did nothing to stop seeing him. I would guess that you found the attention flattering, though unwanted. Eventually, he wore down your defenses. I would not be surprised to learn that alcohol or drugs were involved. I would not be surprised if you allowed sexual touching to go on. However it happened, at a weak moment, you gave in to the temptation. The real problem was thinking you were strong enough to defeat temptation instead of running from it.<\/p>\n
Regardless, the true danger is that you are living a life that will not lead you to heaven (I Corinthians 6:9-10). Chasing after pleasure allowed bad things to happen and these will progress unless you make an effort to change. The solution is to submit to the laws of God.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Question: Alright, sir. I slept with my lover’s friend. Truth be told, I don’t know how it happened because he bothered me before and I refused. I even told my man about him and actions were taken, but I don’t know how I succumbed. Everything happened in a flash, and I’m wondering why, after refusing,…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[1572],"class_list":["post-6897","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-fornication"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":36469,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-stop-sinning-with-my-friend\/","url_meta":{"origin":6897,"position":0},"title":"How do I stop sinning with my friend?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 15, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My year began on a very hopeful note, and I was really looking forward to making great changes in my life. My guy friend and I had not chatted or hung out for a while. Unfortunately the day we saw each other it seemed we could not resist not\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":47760,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-get-my-fiance-to-stop-breaking-up-with-me\/","url_meta":{"origin":6897,"position":1},"title":"How do I get my fiance to stop breaking up with me?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 25, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My fianc\u00e9 recently lost his mom. We are a blended family. We got into an argument at church and left. Our children got into an argument at church and when we came back inside from having a smoke, his daughter asked to talk to him privately. When he came\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":32436,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-ask-about-my-lovers-past-relationships\/","url_meta":{"origin":6897,"position":2},"title":"How do I ask about my lover’s past relationships?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 6, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I want to know how I can ask about past relationships of my lover. Answer: I assume that by \"lover\" you mean the one you love and not that you are having sex outside of marriage. If you are sexually involved, you are already off on the wrong path.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":38956,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-feel-terrible-i-had-sex-with-a-friend-and-damaged-my-relationship-with-my-boyfriend\/","url_meta":{"origin":6897,"position":3},"title":"I feel terrible. I had sex with a friend and damaged my relationship with my boyfriend","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 22, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, Please answer, I don't know who to turn to. I have questions regarding fornication. I've sinned, I couldn't resist the temptation. Now I'm feeling terrible. What happened is I'm in a relationship with a guy I've known since high school. When I went to college I had a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":28376,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-dont-know-who-the-father-of-my-child-is\/","url_meta":{"origin":6897,"position":4},"title":"I don’t know who the father of my child is","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 10, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I had lost a baby last May. After the miscarriage, I wasn't put on any birth control. My boyfriend and I had unprotected sex. He pulls out, but he pre-nuts a lot while we are having sex. One night, well OK, I cheated and had unprotected sex with\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":48862,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/am-i-still-a-virgin\/","url_meta":{"origin":6897,"position":5},"title":"Am I still a virgin?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"June 25, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Am I still a virgin? Is God disappointed in me? Growing up as a child, I was raped when I was really little. But then Jesus found me when I became a teenager and I love him.\u00a0 I forgave the person who raped me. I even hated boys at\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6897","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6897"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6897\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6897"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6897"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6897"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}