by Jeffrey W. Hamilton<\/p>\n\tI. The world in its wisdom comes up with many theories about how children ought to be\nraised.\n A. In the 1960s a psychologist named Benjamin Spock became famous with a book\nproposing that children should not be spanked\n
1. He argued that other, non-physical methods were just as effective<\/p>\n 2. Spanking would damage a child psyche. It would break his spirit and\nstifle his creativity.\n
3. This despite eons of child raising that included spanking.<\/p>\n B. Though Dr. Spock has since recanted his position (though only partially), the\naffect is still felt today.\n
1. Spanking will ruin a child’s self-esteem<\/p>\n
2. Spanking will teach a child to solve problems by violence<\/p>\n
3. Spanking is abusive behavior.<\/p>\n
C. We can see this influence in our society<\/p>\n 1. Foster and adoptive parents in Virginia (and I assume here) have to sign a\nstatement vowing never to punish the child in their custody by any\nphysical means.\n
2. A parent in New York state recently stood trial for spanking his 13 year-old daughter, even though she stated she deserved the punishment. <\/p>\n
3. A similar case in Iowa was just overturn by the Supreme Court of Iowa.<\/p>\n a. A man was charge of child abuse for spanking his 8-year-old\ndaughter with a spoon. His estranged wife decided it was abuse.\n b. He was found guilty by lower courts, but the Supreme Court of\nIowa found that the definition of the Iowa Social Service for abuse\nto be too strict in regards to corporal punishment.\n
D. But God has different ideas<\/p>\n
1. God created humans. He knows more about mankind than any man.<\/p>\n 2. Man, in his wisdom, likes to think they can improve on God’s scheme, but\nthey are proven wrong time and time again.\n
II. We live our whole life with rules and restrictions<\/p>\n
A. We can’t avoid them and children need to learn to respect authority<\/p>\n
B. Pr. 22:6 – Children need direction in their lives<\/p>\n
C. How many parents here find their children annoying and tiring? <\/p>\n
1. Yet, look at Pr. 29:17<\/p>\n 2. I suspect most of us, including myself, have not properly applied\ncorrection as the Lord has taught us.\n D. Some parents avoid punishing their children, because they don’t want their\nchildren to “hate” them.\n
1. Instead of the parents being in charge, the children rule the home.<\/p>\n
III. Rather than take my word for it, let us see what God has said about disciplining children<\/p>\n
A. Prov. 13:24 – Love requires the use of the rod<\/p>\n 1. We are God’s children and we are disciplined by our heavenly Father –\nHeb. 12:3-11\n
B. Prov. 22:15- The use of the rod removes the foolishness (or silliness) from a child<\/p>\n C. Prov. 23:13-14 – Using the rod will NOT harm the child and it WILL save his\nsoul.\n D. Prov. 29:15 – The use of the rod teaches wisdom to a child and prevents\nembarrassment.\n
E. Quite a bit different from modern opinions is it not?<\/p>\n
IV. Application of these verses<\/p>\n
A. What is a rod?<\/p>\n
1. Jer. 1:11 and Gen. 30:37 contain the same Hebrew word<\/p>\n
2. A rod is a branch or a scion.<\/p>\n
3. [Show an example]<\/p>\n 4. The best rods (or switches in more modern terms) is a fresh branch from a\nbush or a tree about 1\/8 to 1\/4 inch in diameter and 12 to 18 inches long.\n a. You want it flexible, because it stings when applied, but doesn’t\ncause wounds (other than red marks for a short while).\n
5. Your hand is not a good rod.<\/p>\n a. To be effective (i.e. to sting), it requires too much forces. Many\nladies cannot produce enough force. Many men produce too much.\n
b. You want the punishment associated with the rod, not your hands<\/p>\n
6. Other items, such as wooden spoons or belts can cause too much damage.<\/p>\n
a. We are not looking for lasting injury<\/p>\n
b. We need a punishment that stings<\/p>\n
B. When to administer<\/p>\n
1. Punish any willful disobedience or negligence<\/p>\n
a. Make sure the child understands what is required of him<\/p>\n (1) If there is any distractions, have the child look you in the\neyes.\n
(2) Have the child acknowledge what you said<\/p>\n
b. Don’t punish true accidents<\/p>\n (1) Glasses turn over on the best of us, but if a child is told not\nto reach across the table and he does anyway, spilling the\nmilk, then punishment should be inflicted.\n
2. Often you will see an “I dare you” look in a young child<\/p>\n (1) I have seen three-year-olds get their parents attention before\nbreaking a rule.\n (2) You may think “This child is nuts!”, but he is testing how\nfar he can push you and if you are not paying attention, then\nhe won’t know.\n
3. Punishment should be due to the child’s breaking a rule.<\/p>\n a. Never punish because you had a bad day at the office or because\nJunior kept you up half the night with a cold\n b. But don’t forego punishment because it happened on a bad day\neither.\n c. That means you will frequently be punishing when you are not\nangry, which is more difficult than you think. You are punishing\nbecause the child needs instruction.\n
4. Start early<\/p>\n a. As soon as a child can “get into trouble” which means as soon as\nthey start to crawl around.\n
b. Initial lessons will involve what they can and cannot play with.<\/p>\n
5. Start now<\/p>\n a. A well trained child will not need much discipline later in life. The\npattern will already have been set.\n b. Prov. 19:18 – Chasten (literally blows) while there is hope of\nturning your child from destruction. Stopping means you have\ngiven up hope.\n c. But it is never too late to start, but you will have to make up for\nlost time. \n (1) It is like compound interest. A little training at the\nbeginning will reap large rewards later.\n (2) Start later and you will have to put more effort in to gain\nthe same amount.\n (3) John Rosemond, “The longer these parents wait to take\ncharge of a problem, the farther upstream they will have to\nswim and, therefore, the less likely it is they will ever fully\nrealize their goals.”\n
d. Children never outgrow their bad behavior. Prov. 22:15<\/p>\n
C. How to punish<\/p>\n
1. Prov. 29:15 – Two aspects: physical punishment and verbal reproof.<\/p>\n a. First, explain to the child what they did wrong and why they are\nbeing punished.\n
b. Then apply the rod.<\/p>\n
2. Prov. 23:13-14 – The use of a switch will not cause permanent injury<\/p>\n 3. Prov. 20:30 – It may leave bruises or welts, but they will heal (physically\nand spiritually)\n
4. The punishment should be enough that the child does not want a repeat<\/p>\n a. For a young child, a single swat on the back of the hand may be\nenough. The startlement alone is often sufficient punishment.\n b. Older children will need it on their bare bottom. Usually 6 to 8\nslow, measured lickings.\n
c. If the child repeats the infraction, repeat the punishment.<\/p>\n
(1) Sometimes it will be a test of wills<\/p>\n (2) Just remember that if the child wins, he will think he can\noutlast others, possibly even God. Don’t encourage\nstubbornness in a child.\n
5. The punishment is between you and the child. <\/p>\n a. Take him off to the side where friends or siblings can’t gloat over\nhis punishment.\n
b. Never let another child punish for you.<\/p>\n
6. The punishment must be timely<\/p>\n a. A two-year-old will not associate a punishment “when Daddy gets\nhome” with a misdeed that morning.\n b. Don’t forego punishment because it is not a convenient time, such\nas at a store or restaurant. You will teach them to wait until there\nis an audience to defy you.\n
V. Parents are commanded to raise their children properly – Eph. 6:4<\/p>\n
A. But despite all that has been said, some people still object to spanking.<\/p>\n B. John Rosemond, a reader asserts that “if Jesus had been a parent, he would not\nhave spanked his children . . . so what? Jesus didn’t sign contracts either. Nor did\nhe require his disciples to be a work at 8 in the morning. Because Jesus didn’t do\nsomething doesn’t make it improper. The rod, in ancient days, was a symbol of\nauthority (when associated with a king) and guidance, when associate with a\nshepherd. In this regard, I prefer to think that we are under divine instruction to\ndiscipline our children properly and guide them with loving authority. And no, I\ncan’t imagine Jesus taking a child over his knee and delivering a spanking, but\nthen again, the Bible tells us that God has used methods a whole lot more\ndevastating than spankings to terminate mankind’s misbehavior, communicate His\ndisapproval, and get us back on track. He has destroyed cities, He has flooded the\nwhole world, He has caused people to drop dead in their tracks, He has turned\npeople into pillars of salt. Given the historical consequences of His wrath, I can’t\nimagine God has any problem at all with a well-administered spanking.”\n C. Our goal is to raise godly children. The small investment of our time now will\nsave them from an eternity of punishment later. Is it not worth it?\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
by Jeffrey W. Hamilton I. The world in its wisdom comes up with many theories about how children ought to be raised. A. In the 1960s a psychologist named Benjamin Spock became famous with a book proposing that children should not be spanked 1. He argued that other, non-physical methods were just as effective 2. Spanking would damage a…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1028,32],"tags":[665,106,29,107,108],"class_list":["post-62213","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-parenting","category-sermon","tag-child-rearing","tag-discipline","tag-parenting","tag-raising-children","tag-spanking"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":55911,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/does-spanking-cause-lower-iq-in-children\/","url_meta":{"origin":62213,"position":0},"title":"Does Spanking Cause Lower IQ in Children?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 17, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"by Sam Stinson \"He who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently\" (Proverbs 13:24). I like to think that most scientific studies are not politically motivated. However, when I read about studies like the following, I'm forced to rethink this belief. A study\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Article"","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":11693,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/what-advice-should-we-give-our-children-in-receiving-a-spanking\/","url_meta":{"origin":62213,"position":1},"title":"What advice should we give our children in receiving a spanking?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 24, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Your site gives plenty of very helpful advice to parents about how to administer a spanking. We have three boys. We have spanked them before but not as consistently as we should have. Because of their recent behavior we have determined to start spanking consistently and with no excuses.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":17106,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/one-of-my-boys-is-starting-to-wet-his-pants-when-i-give-him-a-spanking-what-should-i-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":62213,"position":2},"title":"One of my boys is starting to wet his pants when I give him a spanking. What should I do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"December 28, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have a problem with one of my boys. A few times he has had a wet spot when being spanked. At first, I was shocked and thought I was overdoing the spanking and from the pain of the spanking that he had lost control, but it was not\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1880,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-a-childs-pants-be-taken-down-for-a-spanking\/","url_meta":{"origin":62213,"position":3},"title":"Should a child’s pants be taken down for a spanking?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 2, 2004","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I want to ask, please, if it's good to take down the pants of a seven-year-old child for a spanking. Answer: When disciplining a child, spanking is not the only option available to a parent. Often, when parenting is done well, spankings will only be needed infrequently. Raising a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parenting"","block_context":{"text":"Parenting","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":14011,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/what-should-be-the-punishment-for-breaking-a-window-accidentally\/","url_meta":{"origin":62213,"position":4},"title":"What should be the punishment for breaking a window accidentally?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 24, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have two twin boys, both aged 15. My wife and I both agree that the right way to parent is to spank when necessary with the rod. Recently they have been getting into a lot of trouble together, and yesterday they broke a window (whilst playing ball inside\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parenting"","block_context":{"text":"Parenting","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":13965,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/are-bare-bottom-spankings-necessary\/","url_meta":{"origin":62213,"position":5},"title":"Are bare-bottom spankings necessary?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 24, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I'm glad I came across your website and read so many things from other dads of older boys. I'm a single dad of a 13-year-old boy. I've been needing to spank him for his improper attitude, but I have been very afraid to. 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