by Matthew W. Bassford<\/p>\n
The spiritual wisdom of the Bible is usually easy to understand but hard to put into practice. There are few better examples of this than Proverbs 15:1. There are no big words in this verse. The concepts are so simple that a child can understand them. However, even those who have been disciples for decades still struggle to respond to anger with a gentle answer. Can any of us claim that we do this consistently?<\/p>\n
Against the dark backdrop of our own difficulties, the wise behavior of Abigail in I Samuel 25 shines forth all the more brightly. We don’t know whether Abigail ever heard the proverb that Solomon later recorded, but her actions certainly exemplify it!<\/p>\n
The situation in which Abigail finds herself in I Samuel 25:12-17 is truly desperate. Nabal, her jerk of a husband, has offended David, the most famous war leader in all of Israel. Even now, he is coming with 400 men to take bloody vengeance on Nabal’s household. Worse still, Nabal himself cannot be trusted to make amends.<\/p>\n
In these dire circumstances, it would have been easy for Abigail to dither and panic. However, she takes intelligent action to avert disaster. Her wisdom provides us with a template that we can follow when someone is angry at us.<\/p>\n
First, she is honest about the problem<\/strong>. She doesn’t try to tell David that he’s overreacting. Instead, she frankly acknowledges her husband’s bad behavior.<\/p>\n By contrast, we too often get defensive when someone angrily confronts us. That only makes the situation worse. Rather, we need to step outside ourselves, see things from the other’s point of view, and candidly acknowledge our own failings.<\/p>\n Second, Abigail comes to David with a plan and a solution<\/strong>. She brings him the provisions that her husband had arrogantly denied him. So too, when we have wronged someone, the onus for making things right is on us. We shouldn’t demand that they come up with a solution or, worse still, reject the solutions that they offer. It’s up to us to build the bridge of reconciliation to our friend or loved one.<\/p>\n Finally, Abigail shows David how doing what she wants him to do is in his own best interest<\/strong>. She points out that if he sheds blood without cause and avenges himself, he will forfeit the protection of God. Consequently, David accepts her peace proposal not grudgingly, but enthusiastically.<\/p>\n Likewise, we must show those who are angry with us how reconciliation will benefit them. Frequently, we take the opposite tack. We tell them they should make peace for our sakes, even though our good is frequently the last thing on their minds! That doesn’t work. What does work is looking at things from their perspective and showing them how giving up their grievance will make them better off.<\/p>\n Blessed are the peacemakers, but peacemaking isn’t easy. It requires humility, foresight, and understanding. The worldly are terrible at this, which is why we are surrounded by conflict. As the people of God, however, we can draw upon His strength and wisdom to bring about reconciliation and peace.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" by Matthew W. Bassford The spiritual wisdom of the Bible is usually easy to understand but hard to put into practice. There are few better examples of this than Proverbs 15:1. There are no big words in this verse. The concepts are so simple that a child can understand them. However, even those who have…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[27],"tags":[1007,1561,730],"class_list":["post-60678","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-article","tag-abigail","tag-peacemakers","tag-wisdom"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":52845,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/abigails-example\/","url_meta":{"origin":60678,"position":0},"title":"Abigail’s Example","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 18, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"by Jeffrey W. Hamilton I.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0There is much to learn from the pages of the Old Testament \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0A.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0It is true that we no longer live under the Law of Moses. It passed out of existence when Jesus died upon the cross. However, it doesn\u2019t mean than God meant for the Christian\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Audio"","block_context":{"text":"Audio","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/audio\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":8565,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/did-david-or-solomon-marry-any-widows\/","url_meta":{"origin":60678,"position":1},"title":"Did David or Solomon marry any widows?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 29, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Did Solomon and David have widows in the many wives and concubines they married? Answer: David married Abigail, the widow of a man name Nabor (I Samuel 27:3). He also married Bathsheba, the widow of Uriah (II Samuel 12:15), whom David had arranged to be killed.","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":13313,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/a-soft-answer-vs-a-soft-answer\/","url_meta":{"origin":60678,"position":2},"title":"A Soft Answer vs. A Soft Answer","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 16, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"by Steven Harper The wise writer once said, \u201cA soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger\u201d\u00a0(Proverbs 15:1). Good advice, indeed. We would be wise even today to admit that it is much better to give a soft [as opposed to\u00a0harsh] answer because we will be\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Article"","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/10\/scan0012-8-300x245.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":68312,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/what-does-calebite-refer-to\/","url_meta":{"origin":60678,"position":3},"title":"What does Calebite refer to?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"June 9, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Could the term 'Calebite' in I Samuel 25, which refers to Nabal, refer to those descended from the Caleb in Joshua? Answer: \"Now the man's name was Nabal, and his wife's name was Abigail. And the woman was intelligent and beautiful in appearance, but the man was harsh and\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":15793,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/who-were-the-wives-who-gave-birth-to-davids-sons-and-in-which-order-were-they-born\/","url_meta":{"origin":60678,"position":4},"title":"Who were the wives who gave birth to David’s sons and in which order were they born?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 19, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Who were the wives of King David who gave birth to Amnon, Absalom, Killiam, and Adonijah? I am guessing, but it seems as if Amnon was the first, Absalom second, Killiam, and then Adonijah. Adonijah being the last before Solomon because he had the right to the throne before\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":94015,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/the-advantages-of-preventing-sin\/","url_meta":{"origin":60678,"position":5},"title":"The Advantages of Preventing Sin","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 17, 2026","format":false,"excerpt":"by David Gibson As wonderful as forgiveness is, isn't it far better not to sin in the first place? Preventing sin helps us avoid being hardened by sin (Ephesians 4:19; I Timothy 4:2; Hebrews 3:13). Habitual sin desensitizes. A hardened sinner is a sad spectacle indeed! Preventing sin helps keep\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Article"","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/60678","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=60678"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/60678\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=60678"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=60678"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=60678"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}