Hello,<\/p>\n
First of all, I love your site. I have spent many hours happily reading the archives of the questions asked, which has helped me. That’s why I’m coming to you with this.<\/p>\n
Because he doesn’t “feel like it,” my father has not worked for fifteen years; instead, relying on my mother to support him. He is nearing retirement age, and they have no savings whatsoever. I approached them with a suggestion to start saving through my mother’s 401(k) program at work. While she was amenable, my father became upset, saying it is biblical for children to support their parents in their old age, and, therefore, they should save up nothing.<\/p>\n
Is he right? Is there a financial obligation to my parents, specifically my father? He also has a pot addiction that I find morally repugnant and do not wish to finance.<\/p>\n
Thank you for your guidance in this matter.<\/p>\n\t
“For even when we were with you, we used to give you this order: if anyone is not willing to work, then he is not to eat, either. For we hear that some among you are leading an undisciplined life, doing no work at all, but acting like busybodies. Now such persons we command and exhort in the Lord Jesus Christ to work in quiet fashion and eat their own bread<\/em>” (II Thessalonians 4:10-12).<\/p>\n
“But you, brethren, are not in darkness, that the day would overtake you like a thief; for you are all sons of light and sons of day. We are not of night nor of darkness; so then let us not sleep as others do, but let us be alert and sober. For those who sleep do their sleeping at night, and those who get drunk get drunk at night. But since we are of the day, let us be sober, having put on the breastplate of faith and love, and as a helmet, the hope of salvation<\/em>” (I Thessalonians 4:4-8).<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
The command is to honor your parents (Ephesians 6:2-3). Honor can include seeing to their care when they are no longer able to care for themselves, but that is not the situation here. Nothing in this command indicates that a person is to support a person in their sin. Check up on him once in a while. Make sure he is receiving aid if he needs it. But you should not encourage sin by financing his sinful life.<\/p>\n
Suggest that your mother save up for retirement, but place it in an account that your father cannot tap. This will be for her old age. Let your father know that you’ll be willing to help him once he gives up his drug addiction and works for a living. If he won’t live by God’s rules, then he can’t quote God about your responsibilities.<\/p>\n\t
Response:<\/h2>\n
Dear Jeffrey,<\/p>\n
Thank you so much for your kind and concise answer. It has certainly given me a lot to think about. I will have to confront my father soon.<\/p>\n
Thanks again, and please keep me in your prayers.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Question: Hello, First of all, I love your site. I have spent many hours happily reading the archives of the questions asked, which has helped me. That’s why I’m coming to you with this. Because he doesn’t “feel like it,” my father has not worked for fifteen years; instead, relying on my mother to support…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[372,550,386,540,1509],"class_list":["post-54581","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-drugs","tag-honor-your-parents","tag-laziness","tag-marijuana","tag-parents"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":43709,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-can-i-care-for-my-mother-without-involving-my-father\/","url_meta":{"origin":54581,"position":0},"title":"How can I care for my mother without involving my father?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 24, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I am in my twenties. My mother and father are in their fifties. My mother has worked very hard all her life and deserves that I take care of her finances for retirement. She has never owned a home. Presently, my parents rent a townhome. I want to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":53168,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/honor-your-parents\/","url_meta":{"origin":54581,"position":1},"title":"Honor Your Parents","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 10, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"by Whit Sasser In the list of things worthy of death found in Romans 1:30 is disobedience to parents. Proverbs 30:17 says, \"The eye that mocks his father, and scorns obedience to his mother, the ravens of the valley will pick it out, and the young eagles will eat it.\"\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Article"","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":43658,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-mother-thinks-im-too-young-to-get-married-must-i-obey-her\/","url_meta":{"origin":54581,"position":2},"title":"My mother thinks I’m too young to get married. Must I obey her?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 15, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Good day, I am 21 years old, born again and spirit-filled. I'm currently in a relationship with a Christian sister, who is also born again and Spirit-filled. She is 18 years old. 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When I was 15, I broke my\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":46611,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-it-wrong-to-cut-ties-with-my-father\/","url_meta":{"origin":54581,"position":4},"title":"Is it wrong to cut ties with my father?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 25, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My father is an evil narcissist. I feel my life is in danger if I show up at his home unannounced because he has threatened me and then he apologizes when he feels good and ready. His words are routinely evil, piercing, and hurtful. He has said he doesn't\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":30783,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/can-a-daughter-at-18-go-to-college-without-her-parents-permission\/","url_meta":{"origin":54581,"position":5},"title":"Can a daughter at 18 go to college without her parent’s permission?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 27, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Would it be a sin to move out at 18 despite your father telling you that you will leave only when he approves? I know a father who will not allow his daughter to leave home until she is married. 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