{"id":51426,"date":"2017-09-19T20:38:00","date_gmt":"2017-09-20T01:38:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=51426"},"modified":"2022-08-09T20:45:02","modified_gmt":"2022-08-10T01:45:02","slug":"how-should-the-problem-of-child-abuse-be-handled","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-should-the-problem-of-child-abuse-be-handled\/","title":{"rendered":"How should the problem of child abuse be handled?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Question:<\/h2>\nThere exist two families: A and B.\nFamily A could not conceive a child, so the wife of Mr. A adopted two daughters of Mrs. B, who happened to be her younger sister. Mr. B, the father of the adopted daughters, isn’t responsible at all. He neglected all his children whom he had with his wife, Mrs. B.\nMrs. A died a few years ago, leaving the daughters of Mrs. B living alone with her husband, Mr. A. This is where the problem lies: Mr. A has been sexually preying on the two daughters. Mr. A. is taking care of the two daughters though but he beats them and harasses them sexually. Though Mrs. B is aware of what is going on since day one — that the man is lying with her daughters — still she has told the children to endure it since there’s no one else to care for them and since he’s not having intercourse with them.\nWhat is your advice on this matter? The daughter told her boyfriend all this because they are in love.
\nCan this daughter still be considered for marriage by her boyfriend? She said Mr. A hasn’t had sex with her or her sister.\nWhat is the solution to curb the sexual actions of Mr. A?\nIs a white wedding sinful for this new boyfriend and girlfriend? Who should take the daughter to the altar as the father?  Is it her biological father, who neglected them since birth, or the father who adopted her and sexually preys on her and her sister?\nDoes Mrs. B portray a good mother by telling her daughters to cope because Mr. A is still taking care of them?\nWhat spiritual advice do you have for the two daughters and the boyfriend?\nThanks for your response.\n\t

Answer:<\/h2>\n

I’m going to assume that these families do not live in a country that actively protects children. If they are in a country that has laws against sexual acts by a parent, then the agency charged with protecting children should be immediately notified about the situation, so that the children can be moved to a safe environment. But if that is not an option, then is there a church that can provide homes for the children and get them out of this situation? If Mr. A is a member of a church, then the members of the church, who know about the situation, should confront him about his sin (Matthew 18:15-17).<\/p>\n

The daughter can marry whom she wishes. Her past does not matter, so long as she had not been married before. There is no biblical requirement that those marrying must be virgins, though that is preferred because people should not sin. But even sinners can get married.<\/p>\n

The wearing of white is a cultural tradition and has no meaning biblically. The presenting of the bride is also a tradition that shows the family’s approval of the marriage, but this portion of the wedding can be skipped or a person whom the bride respects can do the presentation.<\/p>\n

Mrs. B does not demonstrate the proper care that a mother should have for her children.<\/p>\n

If the boyfriend and the daughter wish to get married, then that is fine. However, the boyfriend needs to make sure that he is marrying her because of his love for her and not because he desires to rescue her from her horrible family. If they do get married, the other sister should be invited to live with them if there is no other way to get her out of the home.<\/p>\n\t

Question:<\/h2>\n

Wow. I was scrolling through my mail and across your feedback again, sir. I just want to use this moment to appreciate you for your response four years ago. It really matters and means a lot to me. I am not ungrateful sir. Permit me to wish you a Happy New Year for the four years we’ve missed exchanging pleasantries.<\/p>\n\t

Answer:<\/h2>\n

I hoped the answer helped.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Question: There exist two families: A and B. Family A could not conceive a child, so the wife of Mr. A adopted two daughters of Mrs. B, who happened to be her younger sister. Mr. B, the father of the adopted daughters, isn’t responsible at all. He neglected all his children whom he had with…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[1105,110,666],"class_list":["post-51426","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-abuse","tag-children","tag-sexual-abuse"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":3660,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-stop-my-daughters-from-stealing\/","url_meta":{"origin":51426,"position":0},"title":"How do I stop my daughters from stealing?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 1, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: [Note to readers: I used automated translation software to get the gist of what was written and then rewrote it for clarity. Please regard any errors in the translation as mistakes on my part.] I need some help solving a problem that I have with my daughters. Any advice\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":13962,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-deal-with-my-daughters-stealing\/","url_meta":{"origin":51426,"position":1},"title":"How do I deal with my daughters stealing?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 24, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I need some help solving a problem that I have with my daughters. Any advice or suggestions would be welcomed. I am writing in simple Spanish in hopes that you will not have difficulties in understanding it. If you do have problems, I will write in broken English. I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Adolescence"","block_context":{"text":"Adolescence","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/adolescence\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":43266,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-deal-with-the-fact-that-my-daughters-were-molested-by-a-leading-member-of-the-church\/","url_meta":{"origin":51426,"position":2},"title":"How do I deal with the fact that my daughters were molested by a leading member of the church?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 15, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi there, I have a complex issue that I am trying to sort through biblically and do right by my family, others, and the law. Two of my daughters have been sexually interfered with by a \"leader\" of the local church here.\u00a0 The first time was with my oldest\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":31950,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/what-woman-in-the-bible-had-the-most-children-and-how-many-did-she-have\/","url_meta":{"origin":51426,"position":3},"title":"What woman in the Bible had the most children and how many did she have?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 24, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: What woman in the Bible had the most children and how many did she have? Answer: I can find no mention of any particular woman having specific amounts of children in the earliest parts of the Bible.\u00a0It often\u00a0tells the firstborn's name and then goes on to say that they\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":20063,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-tell-my-daughters-about-the-abuse-i-suffered-in-the-church-they-attend\/","url_meta":{"origin":51426,"position":4},"title":"Should I tell my daughters about the abuse I suffered in the church they attend?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 31, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I was in a church for 12 years. I left because I was abused there. My two daughters are still there. I am afraid for them. I do not want them trained in this way. Should I tell them the truth? Answer: In some ways, it is hard for\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":27604,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-can-sheshan-have-no-sons-when-a-son-named-ahlai-is-mentioned\/","url_meta":{"origin":51426,"position":5},"title":"How can Sheshan have no sons, when a son named Ahlai is mentioned?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 27, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: In I Chronicles 2, it says that Sheshan had no sons, only daughters, so he gave his daughter to his servant, who gave him Attai.\u00a0 So because Sheshan gave his daughter to his servant, does that mean that Attai carries on Sheshan's name in the family?\u00a0 Is that why\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/51426","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=51426"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/51426\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=51426"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=51426"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=51426"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}