Good afternoon,<\/p>\n
I feel like I have backed myself into a corner and am not sure what I should do. About 15 years ago, I got involved with a married woman. As a result, she left her husband, and we have been living together (not married) ever since. A few years ago, she and I started having issues in our relationship. We simply do not get along.<\/p>\n
It was around the same time that I felt convicted of what had transpired in her marriage and the lifestyle we now live. I understand that our union is not a marriage and is wrong, I understand I am an adulterer. I understand that she is still bound to her first husband (Romans 7). I have read Jesus’ comments on divorce and remarriage in Matthew and Luke. Divorce and remarriage = adultery.<\/p>\n
Am I correct in thinking that God wants me to walk away from this relationship? Or should I marry her after all this time if the relationship can be healed? I want to do what is right in the sight of God. I do not want to be one of those who do not inherit the kingdom of heaven because of my lifestyle. I feel like the only true repentance in this situation is to leave.<\/p>\n
I would appreciate your insight into this.<\/p>\n\t
The only way you would be able to marry this woman is if her first husband died. Living together with her unmarried is both adultery and fornication. Marrying her would be adultery as well because she was the adulteress in her first marriage. “Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries one who is divorced from a husband commits adultery<\/em>” (Luke 16:18).<\/p>\n I’m glad you are finally starting to think about the eternal consequences of your actions, and I hope this is not just motivated by your desire to get out of this relationship.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Question: Good afternoon, I feel like I have backed myself into a corner and am not sure what I should do. About 15 years ago, I got involved with a married woman. As a result, she left her husband, and we have been living together (not married) ever since. A few years ago, she and…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[66],"class_list":["post-51387","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-adultery"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":16840,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-pornography-a-just-cause-for-divorce-that-allows-remarriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":51387,"position":0},"title":"Is pornography a just cause for divorce that allows remarriage?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 13, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I have recently begun a wonderful relationship with a lady friend.\u00a0 Over the last four months or so we have developed a wonderful friendship which has recently blossomed into a budding romance.\u00a0 However, she has, within the last six months or so, filed for divorce from her husband\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":17100,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-i-need-to-renew-my-vows-with-my-current-husband-since-my-former-husband-has-died\/","url_meta":{"origin":51387,"position":1},"title":"Do I need to renew my vows with my current husband since my former husband has died?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"December 28, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have spoken to several sound brethren who are elders and ministers in churches of Christ in regard to marriage, divorce, and remarriage. 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The man I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":29692,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/why-cant-my-sister-get-baptized\/","url_meta":{"origin":51387,"position":2},"title":"Why can’t my sister get baptized?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 23, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: In a second marriage where a non-Christian is wanting to become a Christian but was divorced for reasons other than adultery, is the sin the adultery or the remarriage?\u00a0I am asking this in the context of repenting.\u00a0Do you repent of the adultery in this second marriage or repent of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":24503,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-could-a-woman-in-an-adulterous-marriage-have-the-right-to-remarry-after-a-divorce\/","url_meta":{"origin":51387,"position":3},"title":"How could a woman in an adulterous marriage have the right to remarry after a divorce?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 13, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have read through your articles and thoroughly enjoyed them, and even taken a few sermons and re-worked them into sermons that I preached here. However, when I came across\u00a0an answer to a question you made concerning divorce and remarriage, I was a bit taken aback because of you\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":31147,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/does-fornication-include-adultery-or-are-people-only-looking-for-another-way-out-of-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":51387,"position":4},"title":"Does fornication include adultery, or are people only looking for another way out of marriage?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 22, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I emailed you before regarding marriage and divorce and remarriage. I must admit I emailed hastily before reading your entire view on this. After reading more, I agree with most of what you said on this highly debated topic of the Bible. As a new Christian and one that\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":37904,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-second-husband-left-and-now-wants-a-divorce-what-should-i-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":51387,"position":5},"title":"My second husband left and now wants a divorce. What should I do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 19, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have a past that I am not proud of. I was in and out of the church and never truly committed to God.\u00a0 I did ask for salvation when I was around 19 but was still not committed to God. 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