{"id":49623,"date":"2016-12-20T11:23:00","date_gmt":"2016-12-20T17:23:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=49623"},"modified":"2022-07-09T11:28:09","modified_gmt":"2022-07-09T16:28:09","slug":"where-is-your-dad","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/where-is-your-dad\/","title":{"rendered":"Where Is Your Dad?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\t<p>by Kevin Sutton<\/p>\n<p>During the interview, the young man confessed to a crime that no doubt would send him to prison. I turned the recorder off, interview over, case solved, I had done my job. Even though I was certain that I knew the answer, I ask the young man anyway. I ask, &#8220;Son, where&#8217;s your dad?&#8221; His head dropped, and I could see tears falling onto his shirt &#8212; he could not speak.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ve seen this far too many times. Tears now were in my eyes. After a couple of minutes, I ask, &#8220;How long has your dad been gone?&#8221; I wiped my tears. After another minute or so he said, &#8220;I see him once a year, maybe twice.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>It is always at this point I get mad, not at the young man, but at the real criminal who left him years ago. I meet with his mom and through her tears, she blames herself and ask what she should have or could have done differently. She said she had worked two jobs most of the time, just for the two of them to survive. It is then we handcuff him and have him transported to jail. She cries. He is only 18 years old. I&#8217;m still mad and heartbroken all at the same time.<\/p>\n<p>Now, is the young man responsible for what he has done? Yes. Does he have to answer for what he has done? Yes. Do all boys go astray without a father? No, and I fully understand that. Some of the finest young men you could ever meet had a father who was worthless. And sometimes it is the mother who walks out, I get it. And sometimes a crazy woman will run a good man off, but the father does not have to leave his son or daughter! I get all of that, every bit of it! I just know for over 36 years I have witnessed countless young men in that same guilty spot and the absolute &#8212; without any question &#8212; most common denominator in all of those young men&#8217;s lives was that they had a father who did not play a part in their lives. So sad and terrible.<\/p>\n<p>I wished the whole world knew, and especially fathers, what children truly need and what they don&#8217;t need. What they really need will never fit under a Christmas tree, nor can you purchase it at any Walmart. They need a mother, yes, but fathers, they need you! Fathers, they need you! They need a daddy that they can count on! They need a daddy who loves them and shows them that he loves them and is there for them every step of the way! They need a daddy who will teach them how to get along in this life and how to treat others.<\/p>\n<p>Think not that I think that I raised my children with perfection, no. &#8220;<em>And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and the admonition of the Lord<\/em>&#8221; (Ephesians 6:4). &#8220;<em>Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged<\/em>&#8221; (Colossians 3:21). Children should not have to be taught to behave by our criminal justice system, they should be taught that from their parents, who learned themselves from the Word of God.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>by Kevin Sutton During the interview, the young man confessed to a crime that no doubt would send him to prison. I turned the recorder off, interview over, case solved, I had done my job. Even though I was certain that I knew the answer, I ask the young man anyway. I ask, &#8220;Son, where&#8217;s&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20,1028],"tags":[665,778,29,107],"class_list":["post-49623","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","category-parenting","tag-child-rearing","tag-father","tag-parenting","tag-raising-children"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":14000,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-11-year-old-son-is-becoming-overly-dramatic-and-moody\/","url_meta":{"origin":49623,"position":0},"title":"My 11-year-old son is becoming overly dramatic and moody","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 24, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I am emailing you because you always have great advice for so many situations. I am having a hard time with my 11-year-old son. I am beginning to contemplate sending him to public school. Last year was the worst year we have had. I am fearing this year is\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Adolescence&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Adolescence","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/adolescence\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":32053,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-it-right-that-a-mother-doesnt-want-the-father-involved-in-their-childs-life\/","url_meta":{"origin":49623,"position":1},"title":"Is it right that a mother doesn&#8217;t want the father involved in their child&#8217;s life?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 5, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Good evening, I have a friend who had sex outside of marriage and she had a child out of it. She feels\u00a0very strongly about not wanting the father to be in the child's life at all because he's not paying child support, he's not coming to visit his son\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":50214,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-far-do-we-help-with-the-wedding-of-a-young-man-who-got-a-girl-pregnant\/","url_meta":{"origin":49623,"position":2},"title":"How far do we help with the wedding of a young man who got a girl pregnant?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 19, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello brother, how are you? I have a question for you, but first, let me give you some context.\u00a0I am a Spanish-speaking minister who works with an English-speaking church that meets in the same building. There is a sister in the church who has always come to church. She\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":33153,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-i-tell-my-children-the-truth-that-their-dad-and-i-had-sex-before-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":49623,"position":3},"title":"Do I tell my children the truth, that their dad and I had sex before marriage?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"June 7, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My husband and I are both Christians.\u00a0 However, we had sex before marriage (only with each other).\u00a0 I have been wondering what to tell my daughters if they ask me if we had sex before marriage.\u00a0 I am afraid if I tell them the truth, then they will think\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":37767,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-16-year-old-is-being-disrespectful\/","url_meta":{"origin":49623,"position":4},"title":"My 16-year-old is being disrespectful","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 13, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have a 16-year-old son who has been very disrespectful in this household. It's all because he asked if he could stay with a friend one night and I told him yes. But I called to check on him, and he had gone to a party that had alcohol.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":29823,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/why-did-saul-ask-whose-son-david-was-after-his-battle-with-goliath\/","url_meta":{"origin":49623,"position":5},"title":"Why did Saul ask whose son David was after his battle with Goliath?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 4, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I'm reading in I Samuel 16:21. It says that David came into Saul's service to play harp for Saul then became one of Saul's armor-bearers.\u00a0 Saul even sent word to Jesse saying to 'allow David to remain in my service,' so I would assume that Saul knew who David\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/49623","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=49623"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/49623\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=49623"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=49623"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=49623"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}