I was raised in a broken family, so my mother took care of us though we were poor. I faced so many problems since I was young, like older relatives sleeping with me, but since I was young l didn’t realize how they were taking advantage of me.<\/p>\n
When I was in my twenties I got my first boyfriend. Since I didn’t have a job, my boyfriend helped me a lot. I thought he loved me. I was confused because of all the situations, like lacking money sometimes to buy food. We continued to be together for about a year. At that time I got pregnant, but I didn’t realize it, since I had no signs until after the first month. I called my boyfriend and told him I was pregnant, but he didn’t accept the baby. Instead, he gave me money to abort. I had to abort because my family doesn’t have a home and to make matters worse he was the one I thought was going to marry me. It affects me even now that I am a Christian.<\/p>\n
I know God forgave but the problem is I don’t trust any man. I have a new boyfriend who seriously wants to marry me. I want to tell him everything, but I fear I might lose him because my story is weird. Really, I feel like becoming a lesbian.<\/p>\n
Please, I need your help because I am still struggling with my past and helping my family too. Pray for me also that my new boyfriend will accept me even after telling him my worst past.<\/p>\n\t
Yes, you’ve had a difficult start in life, but your past doesn’t have to affect your future.<\/p>\n
To be clear, it was wrong of the adults in your life to take advantage of you when you were young. It was wrong of you to have had sex with a man with whom you were not married. Regardless of his choice, it was wrong of you to have killed your child. But regardless of all the sins done to you and done by you, the important point is to leave the sins behind. “Knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin. For he who has died has been freed from sin<\/em>” (Romans 6:6-7).<\/p>\n This is why I find it confusing that you state you feel like becoming a lesbian. You don’t fix problems by going into sin. It is sin that brought all these problems into your life. Homosexuality is condemned in the Scriptures. You cannot be a homosexual and a Christian. “For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due<\/em>” (Romans 1:26-27).<\/p>\n But I have something else I want you to consider: Do you want this man to love you for who you are or for who you pretend to be? If your future husband is going to live with you in an understanding way (I Peter 3:7), then he needs some insights into the world you came from. If your past drives this man off, then he is not as good of a man as you thought. But if he is a true man, it might take a while for him to process what you tell him, but he will stay with you. So tell him that you would like to talk to him about your past. Warn him that it isn’t pleasant or pretty. Assure him that you’ve come a long way, but you would like him to know about your journey. When he is ready, then calmly tell him about your life. Don’t go into graphic detail, but like you did for me factually state the bad things that happened to you, but I would also like you to include the good things that happened as well so that you present a balanced story. Thus, tell about how you found Christ and how you’ve been working on changing.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Question: I was raised in a broken family, so my mother took care of us though we were poor. I faced so many problems since I was young, like older relatives sleeping with me, but since I was young l didn’t realize how they were taking advantage of me. When I was in my twenties…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[28,149,1572,35,571,666],"class_list":["post-49470","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-abortion","tag-dating","tag-fornication","tag-homosexuality","tag-pregnancy","tag-sexual-abuse"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":41479,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/we-didnt-have-a-wedding-ceremony-am-i-married\/","url_meta":{"origin":49470,"position":0},"title":"We didn’t have a wedding ceremony. Am I married?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 6, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My case is the same with\u00a0Am I married? but the difference is I am a woman. I knew it was wrong, but still, I already committed it with my boyfriend. Maybe I loved him or maybe I was infatuated with him. I don't know because he's the first man\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":37017,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-honor-my-dad-when-he-wont-talk-to-me\/","url_meta":{"origin":49470,"position":1},"title":"How do I honor my dad when he won’t talk to me?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 28, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My dad and I were always close when I was little. I was a daddy's girl even though he lived in another state. I lived with my mom and only saw him during the summer. We drifted apart when he got married, and I stopped visiting him when I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":48688,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-parents-dont-get-along-how-do-i-fix-the-situation\/","url_meta":{"origin":49470,"position":2},"title":"My parents don’t get along. How do I fix the situation?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 14, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I feel so sad right now. I'm a 23-year-old female. I have my parents who never got along well. They've been having problems since I was young. They would always complain and talk badly about each other to my siblings and me. They would blame each other for\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":43196,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-wanted-a-child-with-my-boyfriend-but-he-got-his-ex-girlfriend-pregnant-instead-i-need-help\/","url_meta":{"origin":49470,"position":3},"title":"I wanted a child with my boyfriend, but he got his ex-girlfriend pregnant instead. I need help","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 10, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My boyfriend and I have been trying to have a child. Every month I worry about being pregnant. A few days back he told me his ex-girlfriend came over and he slept with her out of pity. Now she's pregnant. I am devastated right now because the one thing\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":39668,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/after-finding-out-a-man-acted-lewdly-toward-me-my-boyfriend-wants-to-leave-me-what-do-i-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":49470,"position":4},"title":"After finding out a man acted lewdly toward me, my boyfriend wants to leave me. What do I do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 11, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Does it count as fornication if a man coerces you into touching his penis? I've recently repented of my sins and confessed to the appropriate people. But I wanted to know because when my boyfriend and I first got an apartment together, we had to have roommates -- another\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":45097,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-got-pregnant-when-i-sinned-and-now-my-father-wants-me-to-abort-the-child-what-should-i-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":49470,"position":5},"title":"I got pregnant when I sinned and now my father wants me to abort the child. What should I do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 21, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Good evening minister. I am a Christian and very influential to both the young and the old. I am 29 years old but, due to circumstances, I am still living with my parents. I read one of your posting about the answer to the question:\u00a0How do you repent of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/49470","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=49470"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/49470\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=49470"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=49470"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=49470"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}