{"id":47864,"date":"2016-04-16T20:46:00","date_gmt":"2016-04-17T01:46:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=47864"},"modified":"2022-05-28T20:48:33","modified_gmt":"2022-05-29T01:48:33","slug":"i-know-it-is-wrong-but-i-keep-wanting-to-have-sex-with-my-boyfriend","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-know-it-is-wrong-but-i-keep-wanting-to-have-sex-with-my-boyfriend\/","title":{"rendered":"I know it is wrong, but I keep wanting to have sex with my boyfriend"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\t<h2>Question:<\/h2>\n<p>What happens if you fornicate with the person you intend on marrying? You know how secret sins are- very addictive! And you acknowledge that it is a sin and you wish to stop!<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m 21 years old. I never had sex before I came to Christ. I&#8217;d always believed in God from a young age anyway because I was brought up in a Christian family. But when I was 18 I had the conviction of who I was in Christ, that was when I had an experiential knowledge of God, and developed a real relationship with him. I even used to teach Sunday school in the church. The insight into the word I&#8217;d get was beyond ordinary (to the glory of God) and more, I actually loved talking about Him and the word!<\/p>\n<p>That same year was when I started struggling with my flesh more. I met this really amazing guy the year before. Sex wasn&#8217;t even on the agenda, but somehow it happened and again and again. It continued for two years. I just wanted to be free. I&#8217;m in love with this guy and it isn&#8217;t even lust. I pray for him and that&#8217;s borne out of a heart of love. I always resolve to stay pure, but somehow this love has been corrupted! I can&#8217;t seem to knock off this urge to be with him (sexually), but I don&#8217;t want to! I hate it! I always pray about it.<\/p>\n<p>What do you advise, please? I&#8217;ve stayed away from sex so far this year, but part of it is due to the distance we live apart. Is it a good plan to maintain the distance while we work toward getting married? Or just let go of the relationship?<\/p>\n\t<h2>Answer:<\/h2>\n<p>You make it sound as if you had no choice, which is clearly not the case. All Christians have to put their personal desires to be subservient to the desires of God. &#8220;<em>Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God<\/em>&#8221; (I Corinthians 6:9-10). You must decide whether God or the desire of your body rules in your life. But Paul expresses what should be on the tongue of every Christian: &#8220;<em>I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me<\/em>&#8221; (Galatians 2:20).<\/p>\n<p>Whether you go ahead and get married or decided to end the relationship is up to you. I can&#8217;t make that decision for you. But what isn&#8217;t an option is continuing to sin.<\/p>\n<p>By the way, the Bible doesn&#8217;t talk about becoming a Christian through an &#8220;experience.&#8221; God is clear about what needs to be done to be saved from your sins. See: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-to-become-a-christian\/\">How to Become a Christian<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Question: What happens if you fornicate with the person you intend on marrying? You know how secret sins are- very addictive! And you acknowledge that it is a sin and you wish to stop! I&#8217;m 21 years old. I never had sex before I came to Christ. I&#8217;d always believed in God from a young&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[1572,185],"class_list":["post-47864","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-fornication","tag-temptation"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":33729,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/if-you-have-sex-before-marriage-but-you-marry-that-person-is-it-still-a-sin\/","url_meta":{"origin":47864,"position":0},"title":"If you have sex before marriage, but you marry that person, is it still a sin?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 10, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: If you have sex before marriage but you marry that person, is it still a sin? If that's the only person you had sex with is it still a sin? And another question: If you beg God to forgive your sins, how will you know if He forgives them?\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":46410,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-thought-i-had-changed-but-then-i-sinned-and-had-sex\/","url_meta":{"origin":47864,"position":1},"title":"I thought I had changed, but then I sinned and had sex","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 1, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I'd like to ask a question. But I must first tell you that I grew up going to the church of christ and my grandfather was a preacher. I got into drugs at a young age as my stepfather abused my mother and I when I was growing\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":38757,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/would-i-be-able-to-remarry\/","url_meta":{"origin":47864,"position":2},"title":"Would I be able to remarry?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 16, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Your website is wonderful and I am learning a lot! I have seen similar questions but not quite the same. I'm not sure if I was a believer at the time of my marriage or afterward. I grew up in the church and knew who God was but I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":37739,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-dump-my-boyfriend-because-he-keeps-pushing-for-sex\/","url_meta":{"origin":47864,"position":3},"title":"Should I dump my boyfriend because he keeps pushing for sex?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 11, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I've been dating this guy for over six months now. When we first met, he seemed very dedicated to God. I loved the way he always spoke about God and seemed to have God first over everything. We even use to fast together! We started dating, but only saw\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":14343,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/what-more-should-i-do-to-be-worthy-of-forgiveness-i-committed-fornication-just-before-my-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":47864,"position":4},"title":"What more should I do to be worthy of forgiveness? I committed fornication just before my marriage","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 16, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I was baptized in a local church of Christ a few weeks before I and my wife got married. But before our wedding day, we had sex (by the way she's not yet a believer of Christ). I knew in my heart before we even had sex that\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":59928,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/tell-them-of-my-way\/","url_meta":{"origin":47864,"position":5},"title":"Tell Them of My Way","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 14, 2004","format":false,"excerpt":"by Darrell Hymel I had a dream the other night, The judgment day was here. It came in the twinkling of an eye, I had no time for fear. I found myself in one great line, With men from every land. Men from every race and age Stood like grains\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Article&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47864","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=47864"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47864\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=47864"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=47864"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=47864"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}