I have been working for an employer part-time, less than 19 hours a week, but I have come across an opportunity to work as a teacher’s assistant. My boss has always applauded me and said what a great job I was doing, and how I was her best employee basically. Last week I told her I would need a reference so I can apply for this new job and it would be a great opportunity for me to make more money, so I can pay off my student loans and other things. She said it was no problem and she would do the reference, but that was a lie. A week has passed and I have had to ask her every day for the reference before my application expires and I lose the opportunity, but she has just said OK and blown me off, pretty much. I have prayed to God to touch her heart, so she will do it, but she has even started being a little rude to me. I don’t know if this is God’s way of telling me that this job is not meant for me or if this is the devil trying to discourage me. I have asked my boss for the reference going on almost two weeks, and I feel it is unfair since I do my job so well.<\/p>\n
Please tell me what to do.<\/p>\n\t
This is not to excuse your boss, but I want you to see the conflicting motivations. You are a good employee, but now you’ve happily told your boss that you are leaving. Thus, she’s dragging her feet because she thinks you will stay.<\/p>\n
You have too much dependence on one reference. Since your boss won’t supply it, regardless of her reasons, see if you can get a few alternative references, perhaps from co-workers or older adults who know you — especially someone who is in the field you are looking to get a job. On your application mention that you asked your boss for a reference, but she hasn’t responded other than saying she will eventually write one.<\/p>\n
What you shouldn’t have done was ask her every day. No one likes to be nagged, especially when they know they are in the wrong. Ask once and perhaps a week or two later give a short polite reminder but after that drop the matter. “By forbearance a ruler may be persuaded, And a soft tongue breaks the bone<\/em>” (Proverbs 25:15). You have to show patience with people who are over you.<\/p>\n\t Thank you so much.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Question: I have been working for an employer part-time, less than 19 hours a week, but I have come across an opportunity to work as a teacher’s assistant. My boss has always applauded me and said what a great job I was doing, and how I was her best employee basically. Last week I told…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[246,105,659],"class_list":["post-46692","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-employer","tag-employment","tag-jobs"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":10957,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-i-have-to-work-on-sundays-if-my-boss-demands-it\/","url_meta":{"origin":46692,"position":0},"title":"Do I have to work on Sundays if my boss demands it?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 6, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I was wondering, do we Christians have to work Sundays, or are we protected by any kind of laws stating that it is against the law for an employer to make a Christian employee\u00a0work on a Sunday? I have a job where they started a new schedule where they\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":32327,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-quit-because-my-boss-insists-that-i-falsify-invoices\/","url_meta":{"origin":46692,"position":1},"title":"Should I quit because my boss insists that I falsify invoices?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 20, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Please, my employer is always asking me to falsify invoices against my will, and I feel guilty about this. Please should I quit the job because of this? Please, I need your assistance. Answer: The simple answer is that Christians are not allowed to lie. It doesn't matter what\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":21822,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-boss-appears-to-be-a-christian-but-she-is-awful-what-should-i-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":46692,"position":2},"title":"My boss appears to be a Christian, but she is awful. What should I do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 30, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I work for a government agency. My contract expires next year.\u00a0 I have been under the supervision of a woman who has been in her position for over 25 years.\u00a0 She jokes that she will die in her office chair; she has no plans to retire. Her office is\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":24877,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/can-instrumental-music-be-used-for-worshiping-god-on-days-other-than-sunday\/","url_meta":{"origin":46692,"position":3},"title":"Can instrumental music be used for worshiping God on days other than Sunday?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 30, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I was also speaking with her regarding instruments in worship. She claimed that since it is only the first-day assembly, which is that worship was done together in one place, then to go to a place where they have instrumental music on a Wednesday night is not sinful. She\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":50745,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-it-biblical-to-take-a-vacation\/","url_meta":{"origin":46692,"position":4},"title":"Is it biblical to take a vacation?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 25, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Dear Sir, Is it biblical to take a vacation from work? Thank you. Answer: Employment is governed by rules set by governments and the agreement between the employer and the employee. 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