Marriage Covenants<\/a>\u00a0for details. Other traditions that are added on top of this are not required by God.<\/p>\nKeeping traditions is nice, but to not follow God’s commands because of your traditions, well, that is just plain wrong. “He answered and said to them, “Why do you also transgress the commandment of God because of your tradition?” <\/em>” (Matthew 15:3). You two have been living in fornication, something that God clearly states is wrong. “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge<\/em>” (Hebrews 13:4).<\/p>\nIf necessary, get a civilly recognized marriage and then work to have a traditional celebration later.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Question: Hi, I just have a quick question: I am a lady of 31 years and my boyfriend is 32 years old. We are both working and studying. I am Zulu and he is Venda. Our cultures are not the same. The Vendas pay a lobola, but the Zulu people just have a union of…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[1572,64],"class_list":["post-46328","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-fornication","tag-marriage"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":35298,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/what-do-we-do-if-he-cant-afford-the-dowry-lobola\/","url_meta":{"origin":46328,"position":0},"title":"What do we do if he can’t afford the dowry (Lobola)?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 15, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have been dating this man for the past three years, and I love him so much. We grew up together in the church but we started dating when I was in my early twenties. He was supposed to pay a dowry (lobola) but he lost his job. This\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":50129,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/we-just-cant-get-enough-money-for-lobola-in-order-to-get-married\/","url_meta":{"origin":46328,"position":1},"title":"We just can’t get enough money for lobola in order to get married","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 8, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Good day, I have a very loving relationship with the father of my toddler. We love one another dearly, but unfortunately, we have no money. He has no money, and I cannot go on living day-to-day worried about the next meal. Our child lives at my home, where my\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":46257,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-paying-lobola-equivalent-to-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":46328,"position":2},"title":"Is paying lobola equivalent to marriage?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 8, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Greetings, I would like to know if lobola (bride price) is equivalent to marriage with regards to sexual relations.\u00a0 I have recently paid lobola (bride price) \u00a0but not the full amount, I am saving money and will pay the full price next and then get married.\u00a0 My curiosity is:\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":35020,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/we-want-to-get-married-but-we-cant-even-afford-rings\/","url_meta":{"origin":46328,"position":3},"title":"We want to get married, but we can’t even afford rings","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 29, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My partner and I want to get married so badly, but we don't have money for anything, not even rings. I have a six-month-old baby with my partner and refuse any longer to sleep with him until we are married because the truth about how the children of God\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4099,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/if-i-had-the-money-i-would-pay-the-lobola\/","url_meta":{"origin":46328,"position":4},"title":"If I had the money, I would pay the lobola","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 18, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Morning minister of God, I have been dating a girl from church for over five years. When it started, we agreed not to do anything that would separate us from God. We managed for several months, but before we knew it, we were sleeping together.\u00a0This actually ruined our relationship\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":92027,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-we-fix-our-sin\/","url_meta":{"origin":46328,"position":5},"title":"How do we fix our sin?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 10, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Good day I strongly need advice. My boyfriend and I have been together for 9 years. We met in church, and we are Christians. We do everything together; we pray together, read verses together. We have a 2-year-old child, and now we are expecting again. We started living together\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46328","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=46328"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46328\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=46328"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=46328"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=46328"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}