I didn’t explore the website, but a particular question and answer on the site really are starting to plant a seed in my life.<\/p>\n
I understand that sex before marriage is wrong. I’ve sought an opinion on my situation from a lot of online sites and I never got a response. My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year, but he doesn’t want to marry me until I finish my degree, which would take about 5 years. We are currently having sex, but I only do it to keep him happy. I am a Christian and go to church. He just claims to believe in God.<\/p>\n
We love each other. I just can’t see the relationship ending. We have grown so close together, it’s impossible.<\/p>\n
He says he would never give up sex for anything, and when I make my decision to stop he won’t allow me to leave the relationship. He says to give him time to get to know God. I don’t mind, but I just don’t want to have sex. He insists he would never stop, but neither would he marry me until 5 years go by.<\/p>\n
I don’t know what to do. I’m not sure if sex, in this case, is wrong. I think it’s not Christian to break up with him because he doesn’t want to break up with me and promises to marry me. What should I do?. I need your advice. I’m dying on the inside. I’m lost and weary. I would appreciate any type of advice.<\/p>\n
Thank you so much for your time and consideration.<\/p>\n\t
“Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge<\/em>” (Hebrews 13:4).<\/p>\n
“Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God<\/em>” (I Corinthians 6:9-10).<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
I have a different approach to life than you. I look at what God commands and then make my decisions within the confines of His teachings. You put your life first and then try to somehow fit God into it if it is convenient. Your boyfriend has a third approach. He does as he wants and if it happens that it matches something God wants, then great! But he isn’t changing to please God or anyone else.<\/p>\n
There are no exceptions. Sex before marriage is sinful. All the claims of love and the empty promises of marriage in the future don’t justify sin.<\/p>\n
Therefore, the real question is do you want to serve God or serve your boyfriend. It seems fairly clear that your boyfriend is saying that if you don’t give him sex when he demands it, he is going to find it somewhere else. His claim to give him time “to know God” is just a delay tactic. A man cannot come to know God while remaining unrepented in sin. “Now by this we know that we know Him, if we keep His commandments. He who says, “I know Him,” and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But whoever keeps His word, truly the love of God is perfected in him. By this we know that we are in Him. He who says he abides in Him ought himself also to walk just as He walked<\/em>” (I John 2:3-6).<\/p>\n
I’m not saying you have to end this relationship. I am saying that you have to stop sinning. Not just giving up the fornication, but also the lewd behavior and lust that accompanies it. Simply tell him that you won’t be having sex with him or any other man until after that man marries you. Unfortunately, I believe that when you make that firm commitment he will first try to talk you out of it and if that doesn’t work he will leave. If that is the case, then you know that the reason he stayed with you was because of the sex.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Question: I didn’t explore the website, but a particular question and answer on the site really are starting to plant a seed in my life. I understand that sex before marriage is wrong. I’ve sought an opinion on my situation from a lot of online sites and I never got a response. My boyfriend and…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[149,1572],"class_list":["post-42784","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-dating","tag-fornication"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":36361,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-boyfriend-texted-me-to-end-our-engagement-on-christmas-day\/","url_meta":{"origin":42784,"position":0},"title":"My boyfriend texted me to end our engagement on Christmas day","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 6, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Good day, My ex and I recently broke up. He ended it through text on Christmas day. He said things were not working out, even after I sacrificed to move down by him and live in his rented apartment. He was supposed to move out but said he will\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":23649,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/im-about-to-have-sex-with-my-boyfriend-will-god-still-hear-my-prayers\/","url_meta":{"origin":42784,"position":1},"title":"I’m about to have sex with my boyfriend. Will God still hear my prayers?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 29, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I am about to start having sex with my boyfriend of nine months. Will God still hear my prayers if I do that? I really am confused. I feel that I'm ready, but I'm afraid of destroying my relationship with God. Please help. Answer: Here is the true test\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":16137,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/im-so-confused-my-boyfriend-and-i-broke-up-but-now-he-called-me-and-wanted-phone-sex-with-his-ex-girlfriend-on-the-phone-i-hung-up-but-what-do-i-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":42784,"position":2},"title":"I’m so confused. My boyfriend and I broke up, but now he called me and wanted phone sex with his ex-girlfriend on the phone. I hung up, but what do I do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 23, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My relationship with my boyfriend is crumbling. We don't live in the same state. We've never met face-to-face. But I've known him for over a year and I'm in love with him, but he is cutting me off. Officially we broke up, but I don't want it to be\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":39950,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-want-to-repent-and-change-my-future-so-should-i-dump-my-boyfriend\/","url_meta":{"origin":42784,"position":3},"title":"I want to repent and change my future, so should I dump my boyfriend?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 19, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I came to the United States when I was 14 years old. I used to be Baptist until we came to Utah and my parents converted to the LDS church. I'm currently not an active member of the LDS church. When I turned 18, I started dating a young\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":19652,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/doesnt-sex-create-a-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":42784,"position":4},"title":"Doesn’t sex create a marriage?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 5, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, it's me, the same girl who had sent you\u00a0a message before asking about sex without marriage. I know God's laws, and I know he made them in order to keep us safe and happy. The thing is, the person and I have already done it, we've had sex.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":36730,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-know-we-did-things-wrong-but-how-can-i-get-my-boyfriend-back\/","url_meta":{"origin":42784,"position":5},"title":"I know we did things wrong, but how can I get my boyfriend back?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 24, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I really wanted your opinion on my relationship. My boyfriend and I had dated for almost two years. He broke up with me about a week ago. I am devastated. I always thought that he and I could get through anything. I admit we argued a lot, mostly\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42784","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=42784"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/42784\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=42784"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=42784"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=42784"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}