Hello<\/p>\n
I’ve been having problems with what to do when it comes to my wedding next year.\u00a0My parents and my fianc\u00e9’s parents have separated. According to our African customs, the father should be the one to give permission on whether we get married or not. He is also the one to receive the dowry.<\/p>\n
This has been bothering me so much because we have been raised by a single mum who has catered to all our needs.<\/p>\n
How can I handle this as a Christian?<\/p>\n\t
Traditions are nice, but traditions are not law. God’s laws come first (Matthew 15:1-9). In this case, there are no laws regarding dowries or giving away the bride in the Bible. The important point is to get married. How that is done is left up to individuals.<\/p>\n
I am positive that your marriage is not the first where the father is not present. I don’t know all the ins and outs of your traditions, but I am sure there is a tribal elder who can discuss these things.<\/p>\n
In most African cultures there are different types of marriages, so you could get married in a civil ceremony, which doesn’t require a dowry.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Question: Hello I’ve been having problems with what to do when it comes to my wedding next year.\u00a0My parents and my fianc\u00e9’s parents have separated. According to our African customs, the father should be the one to give permission on whether we get married or not. He is also the one to receive the dowry.…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[64],"class_list":["post-41550","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-marriage"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":46198,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/am-i-really-married-since-the-marriage-traditions-in-my-community-are-contrary-to-gods-laws\/","url_meta":{"origin":41550,"position":0},"title":"Am I really married since the marriage traditions in my community are contrary to God’s laws?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 29, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Dear Brother, Thank you for the important site you have created in order to answer those questions that affect Christians' lives. I live in a community where people are influenced by traditional superstition and idolatry. I found out that our tradition of marriage is as far as heaven from\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":46328,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/we-arent-able-to-meet-the-terms-necessary-for-a-traditional-wedding\/","url_meta":{"origin":41550,"position":1},"title":"We aren’t able to meet the terms necessary for a traditional wedding","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 27, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I just have a quick question: I am a lady of 31 years and my boyfriend is 32 years old. We are both working and studying. I am Zulu and he is Venda. Our cultures are not the same. 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Can you avail me with materials\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":52891,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-husbands-family-is-denying-him-a-traditional-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":41550,"position":3},"title":"My husband’s family is denying him a traditional marriage","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 25, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have been having this dilemma and do not know how else to proceed. My fianc\u00e9 and I had a civil marriage with the consent of both parents. A year later we were to have a traditional wedding (as I am African) and then a church ceremony. Long story\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":25954,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/can-a-father-prevent-his-daughter-from-marrying\/","url_meta":{"origin":41550,"position":4},"title":"Can a father prevent his daughter from marrying?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 12, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Good evening Jeff. I have some questions that I need Bible facts to support, so I need your help. It is whether a man can prevent his daughter from getting married? If a girl's father doesn't agree to her marriage, can she still be scripturally married? Does I Corintians\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":23691,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/what-should-we-do-since-we-do-not-have-my-fathers-permission-to-marry\/","url_meta":{"origin":41550,"position":5},"title":"What should we do, since we do not have my father’s permission to marry?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 4, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I have read something online that relates to my situation. I have a lady and we agreed to enter into a relationship that will lead to marriage. I immediately talked to her mother. 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