{"id":40228,"date":"2021-11-30T17:18:29","date_gmt":"2021-11-30T23:18:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=40228"},"modified":"2025-04-04T09:53:16","modified_gmt":"2025-04-04T14:53:16","slug":"would-god-bless-our-marriage-after-living-together","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/would-god-bless-our-marriage-after-living-together\/","title":{"rendered":"Would God bless our marriage after living together?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\t

Question:<\/h2>\n

Hello!<\/p>\n

Thank you for answering so many important questions.<\/p>\n

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years, and we weren’t Christians when we started dating. In the last few months, our faith has shifted and we are trying to clean our lives up. We are not married, but we are living together and sleeping together often. We have been discussing marriage and would like to be married sometime soon. I know what the Bible says about sex before marriage and assume it says the same about living together before marriage as well. Living apart is not feasible at the moment due to finances and the fact that he is our sole provider (we have taken on traditional husband\/wife roles, he works and provides and I take care of the home and my child from a previous relationship).<\/p>\n

Could God still bless our marriage or is it doomed? I love Jesus and want to honor Him, but I’m confused about what to do in our current situation as new Christians.<\/p>\n

Sorry, that was a bit long. Thank you so much!<\/p>\n\t

Answer:<\/h2>\n

One requirement that God has for becoming a Christian is the need to repent of your sins. “Then Peter said to them, ‘Repent, and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit’<\/em> ” (Acts 2:38). You know that sex before marriage is wrong. In fact, Paul said, “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God<\/em>” (I Corinthians 6:9-10). The conclusion is that you two really haven’t become Christians because you haven’t fully made up your minds to follow Christ completely. You are trying to stay in the world and its sins while claiming to be rescued from those very sins. It just doesn’t work.<\/p>\n

The simple answer is to make a complete change. Go get married. “But if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion<\/em>” (I Corinthian 7:9). Instead of having a pretend marriage, have a real one. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy or costly. You can very likely get married in a day at the local courthouse.<\/p>\n

The same is true about your Christian walk. Don’t settle for a pretense. Become true Christians. See\u00a0How to Become a Christian<\/a>.<\/p>\n

God doesn’t hold your past against you when you are doing what is right. “But if the wicked man turns from all his sins which he has committed and observes all My statutes and practices justice and righteousness, he shall surely live; he shall not die. All his transgressions which he has committed will not be remembered against him; because of his righteousness which he has practiced, he will live. ‘Do I have any pleasure in the death of the wicked,’ declares the Lord GOD, ‘rather than that he should turn from his ways and live?’<\/em> ” (Ezekiel 18:21-23). But don’t think you fool God with half-hearted pretenses.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Question: Hello! Thank you for answering so many important questions. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years, and we weren’t Christians when we started dating. In the last few months, our faith has shifted and we are trying to clean our lives up. We are not married, but we are living together…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[1711,1572,655],"class_list":["post-40228","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-cohabitation","tag-fornication","tag-living-together"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":39870,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/ive-been-living-with-a-man-while-my-divorce-was-going-through-but-now-he-is-reluctant-to-marry-me\/","url_meta":{"origin":40228,"position":0},"title":"I’ve been living with a man while my divorce was going through, but now he is reluctant to marry me","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 12, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, We have lived together for 7 years. We probably would've been married long ago, but I was going through a divorce for 6 of those years, and hospitalized due to medical illnesses for about a year or something like that, on and off. We are utterly and completely\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":20146,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/weve-been-living-together-for-five-years-and-dont-need-a-paper-to-prove-our-love-but-i-want-to-make-it-right-with-god-what-should-i-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":40228,"position":1},"title":"We’ve been living together for five years and don’t need a paper to prove our love, but I want to make it right with God. What should I do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 12, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 7 years. We have lived together for 5. We are not ready for marriage. He and I think we don't need a piece of paper to prove our love, but I want to make it right with God. Is there\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":43578,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-it-all-right-to-stay-living-with-someone-until-we-get-married\/","url_meta":{"origin":40228,"position":2},"title":"Is it all right to stay living with someone until we get married?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 25, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Okay so on the subject of living together before marriage: I chose this before I knew God. Now, I am stuck in this situation. I have repented for having premarital sex. My boyfriend and I will be getting married soon. Will I go to hell if I die? I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":49580,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/are-we-married-when-he-never-divorced-his-wife\/","url_meta":{"origin":40228,"position":3},"title":"Are we married when he never divorced his wife?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"December 6, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I have a question. My boyfriend and I were in love, we loved God and wanted to be married, but he was married before. He married this woman, she cheated on him, he wanted a divorce but could not find her. They had been separated for seven years,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":43055,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-attend-weddings-of-those-who-have-been-living-together-or-had-been-divorced\/","url_meta":{"origin":40228,"position":4},"title":"Should I attend weddings of those who have been living together or had been divorced?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"June 28, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, My question is about weddings that take place after a couple has been living together for a year or two - sometimes longer. They have a child or maybe are expecting a child, then somewhere along the line decide to get married. They have a big wedding, white\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":57940,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/living-together-before-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":40228,"position":5},"title":"Living Together Before Marriage","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 14, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"by Ray Fowler Here are some statistics on living together before marriage from Michael McManus, the president of Marriage Savers. Statistically speaking, living together is not a trial of marriage, but rather a training for divorce. The number of unmarried couples living together soared 12-fold from 430,000 in 1960 to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Article"","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40228","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=40228"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40228\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=40228"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=40228"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=40228"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}