Dear Jeffrey,<\/p>\n
I have a friend in which I’ve known for about ten years or so and the other day he (I don’t like to use this phrase) came out of the closet. He told me that he was gay. I have no idea how to handle this. Do I stop being his friend? Do I try to help him? I don’t know. Do I act like the Westboro group and just cut him off in hatred or do I act like the Open Ministries and love him? I’m scared to tell this to my church. He also attends it as well, and I don’t want them to kick him out.<\/p>\n
From what you have said in your emails I can see that you are a true man of God. I can really use your insight.<\/p>\n\t
What would you do if your friend suddenly admitted that he is committing adultery or fornication? Would you not say anything? Would leave him in his sin?<\/p>\n
“I wrote to you in my epistle not to keep company with sexually immoral people. Yet I certainly did not mean with the sexually immoral people of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. But now I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother, who is sexually immoral, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner — not even to eat with such a person<\/em>” (I Corinthians 5:9-11).<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Homosexuality is just a form of fornication that involves having sex with someone of the same gender. It remains a sin. Your friend’s soul is in jeopardy and you are fearful stating that he needs to come out of his sin. “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God<\/em>” (I Corinthians 6:9-10).<\/p>\n
This has nothing to do with hatred but has everything to do with love. This has nothing to do with tolerance of sin in the name of “love” but everything to do with rejecting that sin must remain in a person’s life. Accepting sin in others is promoting sin, which is sinful of itself (Romans 1:31). Rejecting sin is done lovingly because you wish to persuade the person out of the trap he is in. “But avoid foolish and ignorant disputes, knowing that they generate strife. And a servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient, in humility correcting those who are in opposition, if God perhaps will grant them repentance, so that they may know the truth, and that they may come to their senses and escape the snare of the devil, having been taken captive by him to do his will<\/em>” (II Timothy 2:23-26).<\/p>\n
Whether he is withdrawn from by the church is up to him. A church cannot allow sin to be openly practiced in its midst and still remain a faithful church. If you cannot persuade him from giving up this sin, then you’ll need to get help. And eventually, if he remains committed to this sin, it must go before the church.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Question: Dear Jeffrey, I have a friend in which I’ve known for about ten years or so and the other day he (I don’t like to use this phrase) came out of the closet. He told me that he was gay. I have no idea how to handle this. Do I stop being his friend?…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[35,1598],"class_list":["post-39576","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-homosexuality","tag-rebukes"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":10789,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/can-a-married-man-have-a-female-friend-whom-he-prefers-over-his-wife\/","url_meta":{"origin":39576,"position":0},"title":"Can a married man have a female friend whom he prefers over his wife?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 7, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My husband has a new \"friend\" (female) that he constantly chooses over me. He lies to me in order to be with this friend. He tells this friend things that I told him in confidence about her, such as that I am uncomfortable with their new relationship. He puts\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":9834,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-be-friends-with-an-annoying-person\/","url_meta":{"origin":39576,"position":1},"title":"Should I be friends with an annoying person?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 17, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: In math class, there is a student who is kind of annoying, but very social and has other friends. He wants to be friends with me, but he annoys me, or maybe it's just his way of being a friend. For example, the last time I saw him he\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":16821,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/can-you-pray-for-my-friend-who-is-on-drugs\/","url_meta":{"origin":39576,"position":2},"title":"Can you pray for my friend who is on drugs?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 11, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I'm searching for all the churches of Christ on Google because I'm searching for prayer. My friend is really struggling. He grew up in an atheistic home, and it's abusive. His parents just yell at him all day long, and they nag a lot. They just tell him everything\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":34217,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/thank-you-for-sharing-searching-for-my-friend\/","url_meta":{"origin":39576,"position":3},"title":"Thank you for sharing “Searching for My Friend”","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 16, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Just a note of thanks for sharing this post and the notes to your friend. I pray that he is still on the right path. There was much wisdom in your notes. I have a son who is headed down the same path that your friend was on. Your\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":50191,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/what-do-i-do-a-friend-propositioned-me\/","url_meta":{"origin":39576,"position":4},"title":"What do I do? A friend propositioned me","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 22, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: One of my friends, who is also a male, has sexual desires for me. He says that he loves me a lot and this is something that will complete the cycle of love for him. He also says that he is not gay. He has never had sex with\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":35291,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-best-friend-has-started-to-smoke-how-do-i-make-him-stop\/","url_meta":{"origin":39576,"position":5},"title":"My best friend has started to smoke. How do I make him stop?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 14, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I'm 14 years old and female. My best friend (who's a guy) has just started smoking cigs and will start smoking weed soon. He doesn't know how much I care about him. Since I am an only child, I view him as my older brother (he's older than me\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39576","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=39576"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39576\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=39576"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=39576"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=39576"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}