Hello,<\/p>\n
My husband left me a year ago. He returned to his country. He did not want me there, so he changed his mind and wanted me there. I went, spent some time with him, but I did not like it so I returned to my country.<\/p>\n
Eventually, I realized I should be obedient and tried to go back there. He refused me, told me he no longer wanted any contact with me and that I was not welcome there. So here I am, praying that God will soften his heart, not make any rash decisions, etc. I feel so hurt and betrayed but don’t want to use divorce as a form of retaliation. I would like repentance and restoration. I don’t know what to do.<\/p>\n
What say you? Waiting and hoping just keeps me stuck in the wilderness, but proceeding to file for divorce just doesn’t seem right either. Can you offer any advice?<\/p>\n
Thank you.<\/p>\n\t
Filing for divorce would gain you nothing. You would not be divorcing him because he is committing adultery, so to do so would only mean you would be waiting to be reconciled to him. “Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife<\/em>” (I Corinthians 7:10-11). About the only thing you can do is let him know you would like to move back to be with him or for him to come back and be with you. In the meantime, you make a life for yourself and wait to see what develops.<\/p>\n\t One last question: let’s say he did commit adultery. Does that mean our marriage is over? Does the act of adultery end a marriage?<\/p>\n\t No. Adultery does not end a marriage. If your husband was involved in adultery and had no intentions of stopping, then you have the right to end the marriage and find someone else if you so desire. But even then it is an option, not a requirement (Matthew 19:9).<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Question: Hello, My husband left me a year ago. He returned to his country. He did not want me there, so he changed his mind and wanted me there. I went, spent some time with him, but I did not like it so I returned to my country. Eventually, I realized I should be obedient…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[66,64],"class_list":["post-39519","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-adultery","tag-marriage"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":24286,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/since-my-husband-returned-from-overseas-he-hasnt-come-home-he-wants-a-divorce-does-this-mean-i-cant-remarry\/","url_meta":{"origin":39519,"position":0},"title":"Since my husband returned from overseas, he hasn’t come home. He wants a divorce. Does this mean I can’t remarry?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 11, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I hope this email finds you in great strength and faith. I spoke with you months ago about my marriage to a man who had just left to go overseas with the Air Force. 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My husband did the unimaginable and\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":35389,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-divorce-my-husband-of-less-than-a-year\/","url_meta":{"origin":39519,"position":3},"title":"Should I divorce my husband of less than a year?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 20, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I came across your website by chance while searching for information on divorce and separation. Below is my question: I have been married since earlier this year and separated from my husband only a few months later. I am older than my husband, and unfortunately, we didn't date as\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":3785,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-thought-my-husband-repented-after-his-affair-but-he-divorced-me-anyway\/","url_meta":{"origin":39519,"position":4},"title":"I thought my husband repented after his affair, but he divorced me anyway","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 29, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I emailed a few years back regarding my husband's while in another country in which an outside kid was born from the short fling. I didn't find out about it until after he returned and the kid was born. At the time he attended services as we're both members.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":36033,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-long-does-it-take-to-get-over-finding-out-your-husband-committed-adultery\/","url_meta":{"origin":39519,"position":5},"title":"How long does it take to get over finding out your husband committed adultery?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"December 3, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I could use help. My husband confessed he had a one-night stand while in another country. He told me six months later after he has been back, so it's been a month now since I've known and it's been horrible. I'm trying but then I have these moments when\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39519","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=39519"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39519\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=39519"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=39519"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=39519"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Question:<\/h2>\n
Answer:<\/h2>\n