{"id":38929,"date":"2013-05-20T19:41:00","date_gmt":"2013-05-21T00:41:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=38929"},"modified":"2021-10-22T19:45:21","modified_gmt":"2021-10-23T00:45:21","slug":"i-behaved-so-badly-with-my-former-girlfriend-that-i-think-i-should-remain-single-for-the-rest-of-my-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-behaved-so-badly-with-my-former-girlfriend-that-i-think-i-should-remain-single-for-the-rest-of-my-life\/","title":{"rendered":"I behaved so badly with my former girlfriend that I think I should remain single for the rest of my life"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\t<h2>Question:<\/h2>\n<p>Dear Minister,<\/p>\n<p>Recently I broke up with my girlfriend, but now I am experiencing guilt because I engaged in sexual activity with my ex. We did a lot, except penetrative sex, such as hand jobs, oral, and sexting. Now I feel like I should remain single my whole life because I believe whoever God might have had in store for me deserves better. I do not want to hurt them, and I feel like I have no purity to offer them now. Is this what I should do?<\/p>\n<p>Thank you.<\/p>\n\t<h2>Answer:<\/h2>\n<p>You need to restart your life, living it God&#8217;s way. Yes, you did a lot of things you had no business being involved in, but it doesn&#8217;t mean you can&#8217;t change and become pure. &#8220;<em>Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God<\/em>&#8221; (I Corinthians 6:9-11). If you mark yourself as tainted, you will leave yourself vulnerable to sexual temptation, telling yourself things like &#8220;Well, I&#8217;m already guilty, so it won&#8217;t make any difference.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Not only do you need to get yourself right with God, but you also need to learn how to properly treat a woman. Your past relationship didn&#8217;t last because it was based on selfish physical actions. You did not develop a true companionship or respect for each other. Even now you see any future relationship in terms of physical acts and you are disappointed that it won&#8217;t be novel. However, you can offer some woman in the future a kind, caring, respectful, and faithful husband &#8212; if you are willing to learn and change yourself completely.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Question: Dear Minister, Recently I broke up with my girlfriend, but now I am experiencing guilt because I engaged in sexual activity with my ex. We did a lot, except penetrative sex, such as hand jobs, oral, and sexting. Now I feel like I should remain single my whole life because I believe whoever God&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[1572,909,442,50,443],"class_list":["post-38929","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-fornication","tag-mutual-masturbation","tag-oral-sex","tag-repentance","tag-sexting"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":42108,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/ive-had-oral-sex-with-several-girls-but-im-thinking-of-breaking-up-with-my-girlfriend-because-she-is-not-a-virgin\/","url_meta":{"origin":38929,"position":0},"title":"I&#8217;ve had oral sex with several girls, but I&#8217;m thinking of breaking up with my girlfriend because she is not a virgin","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 11, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My girlfriend is not a virgin. I'm a virgin but had oral sex with eight girls. Should I leave her? I need a Christian point of view on this unique situation. My girlfriend is 18 and I am 17. She repented and regretted having intercourse with her ex-boyfriend and\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":26052,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-we-need-to-break-up-because-we-sinned\/","url_meta":{"origin":38929,"position":1},"title":"Do we need to break up because we sinned?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 15, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, My girlfriend and I, are both Christians. and we consider our relationship to be serious because our ultimate goal is to get married. We have been in the relationship for over 2 years, and everything was great as a Christian couple, but a few months ago we started\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":34208,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/sexting-is-now-called-normal-dating-behavior\/","url_meta":{"origin":38929,"position":2},"title":"Sexting Is Now Called &#8220;Normal Dating Behavior&#8221;","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 24, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Source:\u00a0Matt Roush, \"UM Study: Sexting May Be Normal Dating Behavior For Internet\u00a0Generation,\" CBS Detroit, 24 July 2012. Source:\u00a0Deborah Gordon-Messer, et al, \"Sexting Among Young Adults,\" Journal of Adolescent Health, 24 July 2012. \"For young adults today who were weaned on iPods and the Internet, the practice of \"sexting,\" or sending\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Issues&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Issues","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/issues\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":34884,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-had-oral-sex-when-i-was-younger-and-now-i-feel-ill-be-condemned-to-have-a-miserable-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":38929,"position":3},"title":"I had oral sex when I was younger, and now I feel I&#8217;ll be condemned to have a miserable marriage","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 19, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have a question. \u00a0When I was in high school I was very socially shy and never had a boyfriend. \u00a0I didn't really go to church because we were Catholic and my mom thought it was boring. \u00a0At 19 I had my first boyfriend and one day we kissed,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":37421,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-it-wrong-to-marry-a-non-virgin-woman\/","url_meta":{"origin":38929,"position":4},"title":"Is it wrong to marry a non-virgin woman?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 25, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My girlfriend is in her mid-twenties. She has a very good heart and she is very beautiful both inside and out. She lost her mother at the age of 8 and was brought up by her grandparents. She had two previous affairs before me. Both of the affairs ended\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":34855,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/sexting-is-associated-with-risky-sexual-behavior\/","url_meta":{"origin":38929,"position":5},"title":"Sexting Is Associated with Risky Sexual Behavior","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 17, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Source:\u00a0Eric Rice, et al, \"Sexually Explicit Cell Phone Messaging Associated with Sexual Risk Among Adolescents,\"\u00a0Pediatrics, 17 September 2012. Source:\u00a0Genevra Pittman, \"\"Sexting\" again linked to risky sex among teens: study,\"\u00a0Reuters, 18 September 2012. Source:\u00a0Genevra Pittman, \"Teen sexting: Strong link to risky sexual behavior,\"\u00a0Christian Science Monitor, 17 September 2012. Basic common sense\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Issues&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Issues","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/issues\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/38929","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=38929"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/38929\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=38929"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=38929"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=38929"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}