I and my girlfriend have been in a distant relationship for over two years. We’ve decided to marry after her graduation. I never had any intention of cheating on her before. But recently I had to be with a girl for academic purposes. I spent hours in her home doing our projects. We became close to each other and eventually, we indulged in sexual activities. It didn’t happen in a day. It evolved from a playful touch and it progressed over the next three months. Other than intercourse and oral sex, we did everything else (hugged, kissed, smooched, and even mutual masturbation).<\/p>\n
Now I feel like I’m doomed. I can’t talk to my girlfriend. Guilt is consuming me. When I look at the gifts she presented, tears stagnate in my eyes. I ran to God and cried for forgiveness. I repented. But still, the guilt of cheating on her is with me. Should I confess to her? I fear that if I confess she would be stunned. The pain she will go through is unimaginable.<\/p>\n
What should I do? Please guide me. Should I confess her or just repent and move on?<\/p>\n\t
Do I assume that you and your girlfriend were not engaged in sexual acts during the time you dated?<\/p>\n
If you behaved properly with her but sinned with this other girl, then your girlfriend needs to know that you are not a virgin. She doesn’t need to know with whom you were sinning or exactly when this happened, but she does need to know that it occurred while you were dating her. She is considering making a covenant with you for the rest of her life. She deserves to know what kind of man she is getting. It would be wise to start off by telling her that you made a huge mistake and that you’ve since changed your ways. Yes, she will likely be upset. She might call off the engagement. But this is her decision. You made yours when you decided to get sexually involved with another woman.<\/p>\n
If you had been sexual with your girlfriend, then I’m left wondering if you really understand that sex belongs only in marriage. It would appear that you only think it is only wrong to be doing sexual acts with two girls. In other words, you tell me you have repented, but I’m left wondering what you saw as wrong. Therefore, I have no means of telling how much you have changed.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Question: I and my girlfriend have been in a distant relationship for over two years. We’ve decided to marry after her graduation. I never had any intention of cheating on her before. But recently I had to be with a girl for academic purposes. I spent hours in her home doing our projects. We became…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[149,1572,205,909,596,203],"class_list":["post-33430","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-dating","tag-fornication","tag-lewdness","tag-mutual-masturbation","tag-sensuality","tag-sexual-touching"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":8844,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-girlfriend-and-i-mutually-masturbated-what-is-the-chance-that-she-is-pregnant\/","url_meta":{"origin":33430,"position":0},"title":"My girlfriend and I mutually masturbated. What is the chance that she is pregnant?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 28, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi. I am worried that my girlfriend will get pregnant. We regret that we did mutual masturbation and somehow we ended up with her panties off and I ejaculated on her napkin. I am not sure that my sperm was completely absorbed by the napkin or leaked down to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":32363,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-it-wrong-for-a-woman-to-relieve-her-fiance-using-masturbation-until-they-get-married\/","url_meta":{"origin":33430,"position":1},"title":"Is it wrong for a woman to relieve her fiance using masturbation until they get married?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 30, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Praise the Lord. I read your correspondence regarding\u00a0oral sex\u00a0and found it to be very enlightening. Does this reasoning also apply to a woman relieving her fianc\u00e9 using masturbation on him until they marry? Answer: \"Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":38929,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-behaved-so-badly-with-my-former-girlfriend-that-i-think-i-should-remain-single-for-the-rest-of-my-life\/","url_meta":{"origin":33430,"position":2},"title":"I behaved so badly with my former girlfriend that I think I should remain single for the rest of my life","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 20, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Dear Minister, Recently I broke up with my girlfriend, but now I am experiencing guilt because I engaged in sexual activity with my ex. We did a lot, except penetrative sex, such as hand jobs, oral, and sexting. Now I feel like I should remain single my whole life\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":54046,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-far-can-you-go-with-your-girlfriend-in-regard-to-intimacy\/","url_meta":{"origin":33430,"position":3},"title":"How far can you go with your girlfriend in regard to intimacy?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 28, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi Jeff, How far can you go with your girlfriend in regard to intimacy? Answer: Let's start with what most people would agree would be going too far: sexual intercourse or fornication. Sexual acts outside of marriage are sinful and are covered under the word \"fornication.\" In Greek, the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":42191,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/since-my-girlfriend-and-i-cant-have-sex-until-we-are-married-is-masturbating-a-sin\/","url_meta":{"origin":33430,"position":4},"title":"Since my girlfriend and I can’t have sex until we are married, is masturbating a sin?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 20, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I would like to say I have spent the past month searching around and will be glad if you can give me the right answer. I am 26 years old man, have a spouse and we have a daughter. May I say we had a daughter before we\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":17247,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/would-masturbation-be-unacceptable-between-a-husband-and-wife-as-a-part-of-sexual-intercourse\/","url_meta":{"origin":33430,"position":5},"title":"Would masturbation be unacceptable between a husband and wife as a part of sexual intercourse?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 11, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, My husband and I have been married for a year now and really love God. \u00a0I just wanted to find out what type of sex is acceptable in a marriage? Would masturbation be unacceptable in God's eyes even if it was done during sexual intercourse? Hope to hear\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33430","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33430"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33430\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33430"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33430"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33430"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}