confession<\/a>.\u00a0 I believe that I have come to a correct conclusion but wanted to ask you to be sure.<\/p>\nI did something that could have harmed a friend back in high school years ago.\u00a0 I’m not even sure of all the details of what happened. I can’t remember, but I do know that I could have wronged them.\u00a0 The person is fine now and has a\u00a0child, a boyfriend, and is living their life.\u00a0\u00a0I have talked to the person since this happened and from what I can see,\u00a0they have no problem with me nor was any harm done to them.\u00a0 I just know that what I did could have potentially harmed them.\u00a0So I wanted to know\u00a0even though they are OK, must I still tell them what I did?<\/p>\n
I don’t see in any way how confessing this to them could make it better for them or help them. It’s not a case where my confessing would save them from some further harm either. It’s just must they know what I did?\u00a0 Am I required by God to tell them in order to be in the right standing with Him?\u00a0 I think that I’d only be worrying them about something that has passed.\u00a0 I’d rather let them live on in peace without worrying about my mistake, especially when I don’t believe it hurt them. It would potentially cause more harm than good.\u00a0\u00a0The thing I’m worried about is if it is required by God for me to confess to this person what I did if they have no knowledge of it.\u00a0 I have confessed to God, and I know that I was wrong.\u00a0 I was young and foolish but have repented and matured.\u00a0\u00a0Does God require me to confess to that person if it is not for the purpose of settling the matter or reuniting us as friends?<\/p>\n\t
Answer:<\/h2>\n
When a Christian sins, he must confess his sins to God. “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness<\/em>” (I John 1:9).<\/p>\nWhen we have harmed someone else, then we are to straighten out the matter with the person we harmed as best that we can. “Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift<\/em>” (Matthew 5:23-24).<\/p>\nIf I understand your situation correctly, you did something in the past that could have harmed someone, but it didn’t. Thus, while you were reckless, your foolishness at the time didn’t cause another person harm, so they have no hard feelings against you. There is no reason to stir things up again or cause potential anger where none currently exists. “If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men<\/em>” (Romans 12:18). Tell your fault to God and leave the matter in His hands.<\/p>\n\tResponse:<\/h2>\n
Thanks, brother. From what I know I didn’t harm them, and they haven’t said or did anything for me to think that I did. They still speak to me and are nice to me. I haven’t heard in any way that they have a problem with me. Thanks for the advice. That’s what I was afraid of doing. I didn’t want to stir up something that someone wasn’t angry about and create unneeded confusion. Now I know that all I must do is confess to God unless I know that a person has something against me. I thank our Lord for you and the work He has you doing.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Question: Hello Brother, I have a question that has been weighing on my mind. I have read some of your responses to\u00a0confession.\u00a0 I believe that I have come to a correct conclusion but wanted to ask you to be sure. I did something that could have harmed a friend back in high school years ago.\u00a0…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[51],"class_list":["post-32771","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-confession"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":52766,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-a-man-confess-that-he-helped-someone-steal\/","url_meta":{"origin":32771,"position":0},"title":"Should a man confess that he helped someone steal?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 11, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Ten years ago a friend of mine committed a crime. He helped a homeless man carry a computer screen to sell it for drugs, even though he himself never broke in but helped carry it from the outside. No harm to anyone was done as it was empty and\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":35831,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/when-a-person-doesnt-know-the-wrong-you-did-is-confession-required\/","url_meta":{"origin":32771,"position":1},"title":"When a person doesn’t know the wrong you did, is confession required?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 14, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have committed adultery many times during the past 30 years of my marriage and in many instances lied to cover up my absence. During the last year or two, I have earnestly started to read the bible and now feel extremely guilty about my past poor behaviors. Since\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":21733,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-detailed-does-a-confession-of-sin-have-to-be\/","url_meta":{"origin":32771,"position":2},"title":"How detailed does a confession of sin have to be?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 16, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: How detailed does a confession of sin have to be? Do you need to list out all that you've done wrong? Answer: First, we need to remind ourselves what is the purpose of confession. Confessing our sins means we are facing up to the fact that we were in\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":18102,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-we-need-to-redo-our-confession-before-the-church\/","url_meta":{"origin":32771,"position":3},"title":"Do we need to redo our confession before the church?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 9, 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Dear Preacher, I must thank you for the wonderful work you are doing to help the churches of Christ. I have an issue that I would like you to help me with. I fornicated with a lady in church, and she is pregnant. We spoke to church elders about\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":22014,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-much-should-be-confessed-to-be-forgiven\/","url_meta":{"origin":32771,"position":4},"title":"How much should be confessed to be forgiven?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 15, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: This was\u00a0an answer given to a question regarding adultery, and if the husband should be told about it. I am assuming he didn't know about it. \"Everyone sins, but the difference between a Christian and a non-Christian is that a Christian does not want to stay in sin. The\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":84250,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-i-tell-her-husband\/","url_meta":{"origin":32771,"position":5},"title":"Do I tell her husband?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 11, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I am a married man. A number of years ago, I was dating the woman who eventually became my wife. At that time, I served in the church, but I had inappropriate conversations with a married woman in the same church. 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