It has long been observed that marriages that are preceded by “living together” have a markedly higher divorce rate than those that are characterized by abstinence before marriage. One of the reasons that I have advanced is due to the fact that the two are not really one — that is, they note who provides the furniture (or portions of it), who pays the rent, who pays the utilities, etc. They are living under the same roof but most assuredly are not living as one.<\/p>\n
The following comments come from Jennifer Morse, author of the book\u00a0Love and Economics<\/em>:<\/p>\n “Many young people who have survived their parents’ divorce are longing for life-long love, but have no idea how to make it work. Many of these young people see cohabitation as a way of avoiding a costly mistake that could lead to divorce.<\/p>\n “Unfortunately, research shows that couples who cohabit before marriage are more likely to report unhappiness in their marriages … and more likely to divorce. This result surprises some people, including the researchers who have uncovered it. But it is not a surprise when you consider that the marriage relationship is much more than a glorified roommate or business relationship.<\/p>\n “People imagine they are taking their potential spouse for a ‘test drive.’ The problem is that you cannot simulate commitment. Members of a cohabiting couple are likely to have one foot out the door throughout the relationship.<\/p>\n “Besides commitment, the other crucial ingredient of marriage is giving of the self to the other. You also cannot simulate self-giving. The members of a cohabiting couple practice holding back on one another. They rehearse not trusting.” [From an interview by Jean Lopez, National Review Online<\/em>].<\/p><\/blockquote>\n As for those who tell me there is nothing in a marriage license (it is just a piece of paper), I tell them, “Prove it.” Get a license and marry one another.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" by Floyd Chappelear Sentry Magazine, June 2001 It has long been observed that marriages that are preceded by “living together” have a markedly higher divorce rate than those that are characterized by abstinence before marriage. One of the reasons that I have advanced is due to the fact that the two are not really one…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[27],"tags":[1572],"class_list":["post-32691","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-article","tag-fornication"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":37910,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-dont-know-if-i-should-marry-the-man-ive-been-living-with-for-the-last-six-years\/","url_meta":{"origin":32691,"position":0},"title":"I don’t know if I should marry the man I’ve been living with for the last six years","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 20, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I'm a divorced woman in my forties. I'm currently living with a man in his thirties whom I've been in a relationship with for six years. Of those six years, I was still married up until one year ago. During the entire time we were dating he asked me\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":57940,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/living-together-before-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":32691,"position":1},"title":"Living Together Before Marriage","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 14, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"by Ray Fowler Here are some statistics on living together before marriage from Michael McManus, the president of Marriage Savers. Statistically speaking, living together is not a trial of marriage, but rather a training for divorce. The number of unmarried couples living together soared 12-fold from 430,000 in 1960 to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Article"","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":63051,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/marriage-and-divorce-the-good-news-and-the-bad\/","url_meta":{"origin":32691,"position":2},"title":"Marriage and Divorce: The Good News and the Bad","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 8, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Psalm 50 \u00a0 I.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0An article came out in the paper in April of 2007 trumpeting the news that divorce rates are falling \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0A.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Divorce rates rose rapidly in the 1960s through the 1980's with the adoption of no-fault divorce laws in the United States. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a01.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0At its\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Sermon"","block_context":{"text":"Sermon","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/sermon\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":10792,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/am-i-married-in-the-eyes-of-god\/","url_meta":{"origin":32691,"position":3},"title":"Am I married in the eyes of God?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 7, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: When I met my husband, he was going through a divorce from his former wife. She had been unfaithful. He moved out and the other man moved in with her. Before I met him, he had already begun the divorce papers. Because of his first wife's unfaithfulness, I understand\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":49873,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/selfishness-and-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":32691,"position":4},"title":"Selfishness and Marriage","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 10, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"by J. R. Bronger Divorce! This word used to call to mind \"breaking up a home,\" and with it trauma, unhappiness, and all manner of problems. Today, however, it is so commonplace that it rarely raises an eyebrow. There is no need to overwhelm you with statistics in order to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Article"","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":22294,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-husband-of-a-few-months-thinks-he-married-too-young-and-wants-a-divorce-what-should-i-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":32691,"position":5},"title":"My husband of a few months thinks he married too young and wants a divorce. What should I do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 24, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My husband is much younger than I am. We've been married now for just a few months. Our relationship took off kind of fast. He is deployed now to another country and since has been going back and forth with the thought of divorce. I have kids, none of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32691","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=32691"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/32691\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=32691"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=32691"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=32691"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}