{"id":29344,"date":"2011-09-27T21:35:00","date_gmt":"2011-09-28T02:35:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=29344"},"modified":"2022-06-03T19:13:01","modified_gmt":"2022-06-04T00:13:01","slug":"how-do-i-explain-spontaneous-erections-and-masturbation-to-my-stepson","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-explain-spontaneous-erections-and-masturbation-to-my-stepson\/","title":{"rendered":"How do I explain spontaneous erections and masturbation to my stepson?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\t<h2>Question:<\/h2>\n<p>During some research, I found on your site, which was named &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/growingupboys.info\">Growing up in the Lord: A Study for Teenage Boys.<\/a>&#8220;<\/p>\n<p>My stepson is beginning a new stage in life, puberty, and he has been getting spontaneous erections. Now, I realize that this can happen at any time and also any place. He&#8217;s been asking me how to control his erections, and I am unsure how to answer this. I explained that masturbation may help to some extent. Is this correct? And is it OK for me to be\u00a0telling him that\u00a0masturbation is fine? Is it a sin to masturbate if the mind is not thinking of sexual thoughts or including other people?<\/p>\n<p>Your opinion is greatly appreciated and, if possible, could I have an answer soon?<\/p>\n\t<h2>Answer:<\/h2>\n<p>Masturbating does not help with spontaneous erections. A boy begins having erections long before he is able to ejaculate. You are better off explaining why it happens. See\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/growingupboys.info\/why-do-i-have-so-many-erections\/\">Why do I have so many erections?<\/a>\u00a0for one explanation.<\/p>\n<p>Just about all boys eventually discover masturbation. You don&#8217;t have to explain how it is done beyond generalities. My usual rule is to explain only a bit beyond what a boy can understand at the moment. Until he experiences an ejaculation, he won&#8217;t understand most of what you tell him. Masturbation is something you should discuss with your boy because it is so easy, especially in today&#8217;s society, to get caught up in pornography and lust to make masturbation easier. Plan on a general talk now and a more detailed talk after he hits his growth spurt. Meanwhile, I would like you to read:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-masturbation-unacceptable\/\">Is masturbation unacceptable?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-masturbation-sinful-or-not\/\">Is masturbation sinful or not?<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-masturbation-a-sin-when-it-is-not-accompanied-by-pornography-or-sinful-thoughts\/\">Is masturbation a sin when it is not accompanied by pornography or sinful thoughts?<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I neither encourage masturbation nor tell people that the act of masturbation is sinful. I do spend a good deal of time helping people understand that pornography and lust are sinful and must be avoided.<\/p>\n\t<h2>Response:<\/h2>\n<p>Thank you very much for replying to my email. I did read most of the information on your site about this subject prior to your reply, but what I hadn&#8217;t found was the link to &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/growingupboys.info\/why-do-i-have-so-many-erections\/\">Why do I have so many erections<\/a>.&#8221; I found all those links very helpful, and I&#8217;m very thankful for your opinion and insight. I&#8217;m now more educated in this, and I think I can comfortably talk to my boy about why he&#8217;s having these spontaneous erections. I&#8217;m also very thankful that your explanations are backed up by scripture references! I hope more parents will find your web site and educate themselves! Keep up the great work! Thank you much!<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Question: During some research, I found on your site, which was named &#8220;Growing up in the Lord: A Study for Teenage Boys.&#8220; My stepson is beginning a new stage in life, puberty, and he has been getting spontaneous erections. Now, I realize that this can happen at any time and also any place. He&#8217;s been&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1033,20,1028],"tags":[665,171,29,107],"class_list":["post-29344","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adolescence","category-answer","category-parenting","tag-child-rearing","tag-masturbation","tag-parenting","tag-raising-children"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":14034,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/can-a-boy-have-erections-at-any-age\/","url_meta":{"origin":29344,"position":0},"title":"Can a boy have erections at any age?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 24, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Can a boy get an erection at any age? Can they get an erection from the time they are born, even though there is no sperm production? Answer: Boys experience erections even before they are born. They start as early as 16 weeks into pregnancy. These erections are not\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Adolescence&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Adolescence","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/adolescence\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":14044,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/our-son-recently-started-getting-erections-when-he-is-spanked-what-should-we-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":29344,"position":1},"title":"Our son recently started getting erections when he is spanked. What should we do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 24, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Our oldest son is 14 and we have always spanked him. However, the last few times he has been spanked he has developed erections. How should this be handled? Answer: When a boy gains the ability to have an erection, he has no control over when they happen. Since\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Adolescence&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Adolescence","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/adolescence\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":20626,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-can-i-prove-to-my-stepson-that-branding-himself-is-not-a-good-idea\/","url_meta":{"origin":29344,"position":2},"title":"How can I prove to my stepson that branding himself is not a good idea?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 23, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My stepson wants to 'brand' his skin. Why-o-why? I ask, but anyway, I told him per God (Lev. 19:28) that it is forbidden.\u00a0 But when I read it the words \"for the dead\" makes it seem it's okay as long as it isn't for mourning a dead loved one.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Parenting&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Parenting","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":14038,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-eight-year-old-is-having-erections-and-he-says-they-hurt\/","url_meta":{"origin":29344,"position":3},"title":"My eight-year-old is having erections and he says they hurt","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 24, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My son just turned 8 and is having erections. He tells me it hurts and burns. I told him to put a cold wet cloth on it so it will go down. My husband tells me it is normal, but he seems so young and it seems to hurt.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Adolescence&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Adolescence","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/adolescence\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":11834,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/since-a-sin-offering-was-required-is-masturbation-a-sin\/","url_meta":{"origin":29344,"position":4},"title":"Since a sin offering was required, is masturbation a sin?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 28, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I was wondering if masturbation was a sin even if one didn't have any sinful thoughts when he does it. In Leviticus 15:14-15\u00a0it says that the person who had a discharged should offer two young pigeons, one for a sin offering and other for a burnt offering. Does this\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":79119,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/does-i-corinthians-75-mean-masturbation-is-a-sin\/","url_meta":{"origin":29344,"position":5},"title":"Does I Corinthians 7:5 mean masturbation is a sin?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 18, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi Pastor, Paul says that married couples should not deprive one another, but they should rather come together for intimacy. How does his reasoning work if masturbation is not a sin? Wouldn't the man and woman simply meet their own needs individually? I may be missing a way to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29344","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=29344"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29344\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=29344"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=29344"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=29344"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}