Hi, I’m not sure how to even ask the question. So I’ll explain my concerns.<\/p>\n
I’m a Christian, being a member of the church of Christ. A sister of mine has married a prisoner. He’s in for murder. She met him through Bible study with a group from a church of Christ. She’s known him for almost 11 years. They recently married. He repented of his sins and was baptized over nine years ago. He continues to study and read his Bible. His now-wife has been visiting with him for the last 11 years, and they always pray together and study.<\/p>\n
My concern is the way her family is treating him and now her as his wife. He’s never been married before, she was a widow. So they are not in sin as I can see.\u00a0 But her family is shunning her and won’t have anything to do with him. So my question is, as Christians aren’t we to be an encouragement to him, be loving and kind? Also to our sister. I’m not saying we need to go visit him. He’s in prison in another state.\u00a0 But he has written a few members and some of her family are not being kind or loving. One of the brethren, the woman’s adult child had the prisoner sent to another prison so that now their mother has further to travel to see her husband. Also, her children are treating her differently, not spending as much time with her, etc.<\/p>\n
My concern is that brethren themselves sinning with the treatment of their mother and their new stepfather. I just want to do what’s right in the sight of God and let my brethren know if they themselves are in sin. So what should our behavior be toward a prisoner who has been saved? I read your article about whether a murder is saved and goes to heaven. I believe only God knows this man’s heart and if he truly has repented. But as a Christian, I need to be an example to him and everyone by doing God’s will.\u00a0 If my husband and I don’t write back, for example, are we being an encouragement? I think not, nor are we showing love. Please help me with this. I want to be right with God in my decision and the choices I make.<\/p>\n\t
Of course, sins can be forgiven. I know of no passage instructing Christians to sit in judgment on whether someone has truly converted or not.<\/p>\n
So do write to him. “Then the King will say to those on His right hand, ‘Come, you blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:’for I was hungry and you gave Me food; I was thirsty and you gave Me drink; I was a stranger and you took Me in; ‘I was naked and you clothed Me; I was sick and you visited Me; I was in prison and you came to Me.’ Then the righteous will answer Him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry and feed You, or thirsty and give You drink? When did we see You a stranger and take You in, or naked and clothe You? Or when did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ And the King will answer and say to them, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me’<\/em>” (Matthew 25:34-40).<\/p>\n The problem is that you have brethren and family who are not convinced that someone can truly change. They probably would like evidence of a change, which cannot be given while he remains in prison. “This punishment which was inflicted by the majority is sufficient for such a man, so that, on the contrary, you ought rather to forgive and comfort him, lest perhaps such a one be swallowed up with too much sorrow<\/em>” (II Corinthians 2:6-7).<\/p>\n You can’t make people behave properly, but you can be an example and tell them the truth.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Question: Hi, I’m not sure how to even ask the question. So I’ll explain my concerns. I’m a Christian, being a member of the church of Christ. A sister of mine has married a prisoner. He’s in for murder. She met him through Bible study with a group from a church of Christ. She’s known…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[1571,254],"class_list":["post-28655","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-forgiveness","tag-withdrawal"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":31571,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/can-a-husband-divorce-his-wife-ten-years-after-forgiving-her-of-an-affair\/","url_meta":{"origin":28655,"position":0},"title":"Can a husband divorce his wife ten years after forgiving her of an affair?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 2, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I want to help my sister in Christ. Situation:\u00a0 A woman cheats on her husband.\u00a0 Husband says he forgives her and stays with her for 10 years after the adultery.\u00a0 Over the 10 years, the husband never really gets over the infidelity. He eventually files for divorce and divorces\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":33116,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-divorced-my-husband-because-the-preacher-said-i-shouldnt-be-married-to-a-non-christian-what-should-i-do-now\/","url_meta":{"origin":28655,"position":1},"title":"I divorced my husband because the preacher said I shouldn’t be married to a non-Christian. What should I do now?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"June 5, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I have read some of the things you have on here and I love the way you respond and answer people. I have been a member of the church of Christ since I was young -- or should I say I was baptized when I was young? I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":36206,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-can-i-know-why-my-boyfriend-was-divorced\/","url_meta":{"origin":28655,"position":2},"title":"How can I know why my boyfriend was divorced?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"December 22, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I'm a member of the church of Christ and my boyfriend became a member a few months ago. We have been seeing each other for a year and a half. He told me that he was married before, but they were only married for about two months before\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":54614,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-my-friend-leave-her-husband-so-she-can-worship-the-christ\/","url_meta":{"origin":28655,"position":3},"title":"Should my friend leave her husband so she can worship the Christ?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 15, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Dear Brother, Greetings in the name of Jesus Christ. This question is regarding my colleague. She was born in a Hindu family but accepted Jesus in her youth. Her parents did not allow her to marry a Christian, so she married a Hindu, concealing the fact that she was\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":43343,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-wife-lied-about-her-virginity-can-i-divorce-her\/","url_meta":{"origin":28655,"position":4},"title":"My wife lied about her virginity. Can I divorce her?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 19, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I have gone through many of your articles and answers, but still, I am doubtful on the exception clause of Matthew 5:31-32. I have a few questions to ask you. It would be better to quote Bible verses so I can go by the word of God. The\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":23910,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-married-a-man-who-was-divorced-because-of-his-adultery-is-our-marriage-ok\/","url_meta":{"origin":28655,"position":5},"title":"I married a man who was divorced because of his adultery. Is our marriage ok?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"June 30, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: What do you do if you are a Christian, have a second marriage, and realize only too late that it was not the will of God?\u00a0 My spouse was a called man of God, but he committed adultery in his first marriage.\u00a0He is no longer preaching, and I am\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28655","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=28655"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28655\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=28655"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=28655"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=28655"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}