{"id":25918,"date":"2011-02-08T21:41:00","date_gmt":"2011-02-09T03:41:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=25918"},"modified":"2020-09-10T21:45:09","modified_gmt":"2020-09-11T02:45:09","slug":"is-it-wrong-to-love-a-non-christian","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-it-wrong-to-love-a-non-christian\/","title":{"rendered":"Is it wrong to love a non-Christian?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\t

Question:<\/h2>\n

I am 20 years old, and I have a boyfriend. We both really love each other. Although he is not a Christian, I can’t leave him.<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Is it wrong to love a non-Christian?<\/li>\n
  2. We both sometimes end up having dry sex. He says it’s not a sin because we truly love each other. I don’t know whether it is a sin. Please help me!<\/li>\n
  3. I had even taken a vow which I broke, and I feel really guilty. I asked God for forgiveness. Will God forgive me?<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Please help and guide me.<\/p>\n\t

    Answer:<\/h2>\n

    Since Paul talked about how marriage to a non-Christian is to be handled in I Corinthians 7:12-16 and Peter talks about it in I Peter 3:1-2, it cannot be labeled as wrong or sinful. Yet, we should note that it isn’t usually the best choice. You and he are not going to see things the same way. You ought to be concerned about living to please God. He will be more interested in living to please himself. While he may not directly interfere with your desire to worship, he might make it more difficult, such as running off with your only car on Sunday so you can’t make it to worship or trying to convince you to sleep in, etc. The conflicts will get worse when you have children because the two of you will have quite a bit of difference in your thoughts about how your children should be raised and whether they attend church services with you. This is what is behind Paul’s warning in II Corinthians 6:14-7:1. It is so easy to carelessly think that who we associate with won’t affect our behavior.<\/p>\n

    The difference is already showing up in his talking you into having dry sex with him. I’m surprised that you count the word of a non-Christian as credible evidence whether something is sinful or not. In regards to this matter, see: “Is “dry humping” considered fornication?<\/a>” since I just answered a question similar to yours.<\/p>\n

    When people repent of their sins (change their behavior) and start living as they ought, God forgives. “But if a wicked man turns from all his sins which he has committed, keeps all My statutes, and does what is lawful and right, he shall surely live; he shall not die. None of the transgressions which he has committed shall be remembered against him; because of the righteousness which he has done, he shall live. Do I have any pleasure at all that the wicked should die?” says the Lord GOD, “and not that he should turn from his ways and live?<\/em>” (Ezekiel 18:21-23). Keeping vows is a serious matter, and the breaking of them should not be treated lightly, but mistakes are made.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Question: I am 20 years old, and I have a boyfriend. We both really love each other. Although he is not a Christian, I can’t leave him. Is it wrong to love a non-Christian? We both sometimes end up having dry sex. He says it’s not a sin because we truly love each other. I…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[149,1227,65,648,203,647],"class_list":["post-25918","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-dating","tag-humping","tag-love","tag-promises","tag-sexual-touching","tag-vows"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":41913,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-marry-the-non-christian-im-living-with\/","url_meta":{"origin":25918,"position":0},"title":"Should I marry the non-Christian I’m living with?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 18, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I am having a few issues. I fell in love with a non-Christian and planned to marry her. I fully believed that God would save her and she would become Christian. I love her but after my pastor kept pushing me not to marry her because she was\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":48059,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/why-cant-i-marry-my-catholic-boyfriend\/","url_meta":{"origin":25918,"position":1},"title":"Why can’t I marry my Catholic boyfriend?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 1, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: God bless you, Well, I have an issue in my life. My parents and I were introduced to Christianity a few years ago. My dad already had a background in it since his childhood, so he connected and loved it right away. 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But I know the errors of my ways and I have\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":40121,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-it-wrong-to-marry-a-non-believer\/","url_meta":{"origin":25918,"position":3},"title":"Is it wrong to marry a non-believer?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 7, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: \"While it is not generally advisable to marry someone who is not a Christian, it is not wrong either.\"\u00a0You mentioned this in\u00a0your answer\u00a0and this is the first time I heard a Christian advisor giving such advice. I came to know the Lord years ago. Several years ago I drifted\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":86538,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-it-right-to-dismiss-a-preacher-because-he-married-a-non-christian\/","url_meta":{"origin":25918,"position":4},"title":"Is it right to dismiss a preacher because he married a non-Christian?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 10, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, First, thank you for all you do to answer these difficult questions. They have helped me a lot on my Christian journey. My question concerns something that happened very recently at my congregation; our youth group had two ministers helping and supporting all the activities (spiritual and recreational),\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":49490,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-a-marriage-performed-by-a-witch-doctor-legitimate\/","url_meta":{"origin":25918,"position":5},"title":"Is a marriage performed by a witch doctor legitimate?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 21, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Here in Africa people go to witch doctors in order to get married, which is a sin. Now can you please tell me if people, who are married by a witch doctor, are allowed to have sex with each other because that for me is a sin? 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