{"id":24928,"date":"2010-11-08T20:10:00","date_gmt":"2010-11-09T02:10:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=24928"},"modified":"2020-08-20T20:14:14","modified_gmt":"2020-08-21T01:14:14","slug":"is-love-enough-for-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-love-enough-for-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"Is love enough for marriage?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\t<h2>Question:<\/h2>\n<p>Is the love between a man and a woman, apart from the mutual agreement of both families enough to bind them? I\u2019m asking this question on behalf of my cousin who wants to go on and marry a Muslim girl irrespective of the lack of agreement between the two families of different religions. They met about two years ago and have been best of friends. My cousin made his intention of marrying her known to our family and theirs, and since then every member of the family has not been happy with him. However, he has the wherewithal for the marriage contingent, yet nobody wants to stand in for him.<\/p>\n<p>My question is: Is their love enough to ensure a blessing for this marriage?<\/p>\n\t<h2>Answer:<\/h2>\n<p>That is a difficult question to answer because few people understand what love is. I would suggest sitting down with both of them and going through I Corinthians 13:4-8 in detail. You can take a look at &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/love-is\/\">Love is &#8230;<\/a>&#8221; for detailed definitions. Remind them that these qualities are what must be displayed in adversity. It is easy to claim you are kind when everything is going well and no one is being mean to you. But love is kind means showing kindness when everything is going wrong and the person you love is having a really bad day.<\/p>\n<p>But there are more issues which should be discussed. Muslim and Christian beliefs are very different in many ways. Because each is attracted to a person who is not of their faith, it tells me that both of them are not strongly devoted to their respective faiths. Is one going to convert to the other&#8217;s faith? In many Muslim communities that can be a life-threatening proposition. If each remains as they are, how will they practice their faiths? How will the children be raised? Most often children of mixed religious parents tend to grow up with no belief because they get conflicting answers from their parents and the compromises that the parents make in regards to their religion leaves only a watered-down belief system for the children.<\/p>\n<p>I think both families understand this and do not want to approve what will cause problems for the couple in the future. I, obviously, see Christianity as the true religion. I would be encouraging the young woman to first decide to become a Christian before marrying your cousin, even though she may be placing her life in jeopardy.<\/p>\n<p>If they marry without either family&#8217;s approval, then they must plan to live a life without the benefits of an extended family. Sure, one or both families might eventually change their minds, but it cannot be counted upon. It means added hardships for both of them without others to rely upon for help.<\/p>\n<p>It is not that such a marriage can&#8217;t be made to work. The problem is that they will be taking on numerous burdens at the start of their marriage which might destroy what they seek to have.<\/p>\n\t<h2>Response:<\/h2>\n<p>I strongly agree with your statement &#8220;Christianity is obviously the true religion;&#8221; indeed it is. The problem with the couple is not themselves but the extended family refusing to give their consent. Anyway, they have agreed to go on with the marriage irrespective of the consequences. The young lady has long since accepted to give up her religion for the love they share. I did forward your advice to my cousin and he really appreciated it, most especially your material &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/love-is\/\">Love is\u2026.<\/a>&#8221; I myself equally have gone through the material as well, and I found it invaluable.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Question: Is the love between a man and a woman, apart from the mutual agreement of both families enough to bind them? I\u2019m asking this question on behalf of my cousin who wants to go on and marry a Muslim girl irrespective of the lack of agreement between the two families of different religions. They&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[65,64],"class_list":["post-24928","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-love","tag-marriage"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":2172,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/the-girl-i-love-is-being-given-in-marriage-to-someone-else-by-her-family\/","url_meta":{"origin":24928,"position":0},"title":"The girl I love is being given in marriage to someone else by her family","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 3, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: There's this Muslim girl I love so much. While I was dating her, her parents found out and gave in her marriage to her cousin, who lives in another country. I don't know what to do now because we still love each other so much. She has accepted Jesus\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":37795,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-love-a-girl-but-she-is-from-a-rich-hindu-family-and-im-from-a-lower-middle-class-christian-family-how-do-we-get-our-families-to-agree-to-our-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":24928,"position":1},"title":"I love a girl, but she is from a rich Hindu family and I&#8217;m from a lower-middle-class Christian family. How do we get our families to agree to our marriage?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 13, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I truly believe in Christ. I love a girl who is a non-Christian. We love each other so much we want to be united. But she belongs to a rich Hindu family and I am in a lower-middle-class family. How do we convince her parents to approve our\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":20146,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/weve-been-living-together-for-five-years-and-dont-need-a-paper-to-prove-our-love-but-i-want-to-make-it-right-with-god-what-should-i-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":24928,"position":2},"title":"We&#8217;ve been living together for five years and don&#8217;t need a paper to prove our love, but I want to make it right with God. What should I do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 12, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 7 years. We have lived together for 5. We are not ready for marriage. He and I think we don't need a piece of paper to prove our love, but I want to make it right with God. Is there\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":25511,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-leave-my-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":24928,"position":3},"title":"Should I leave my marriage?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 11, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I happen to find your web site on the Internet. I have a problem with the man I stay with. I was staying with my mom a few years ago and had one of his children. I had agreed into a traditional negotiation between our two families, his and\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":45067,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/he-no-longer-wants-to-marry-me-after-years-of-sex-does-he-have-obligations-to-me-in-gods-eyes\/","url_meta":{"origin":24928,"position":4},"title":"He no longer wants to marry me after years of sex. Does he have obligations to me in God&#8217;s eyes?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 16, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have been in a sexual relationship with a man who I love deeply for several years. We are both divorced from other marriages. I want to marry him, I always have. But recently, he told me his feelings have changed and he wants to be free. This is\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":46328,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/we-arent-able-to-meet-the-terms-necessary-for-a-traditional-wedding\/","url_meta":{"origin":24928,"position":5},"title":"We aren&#8217;t able to meet the terms necessary for a traditional wedding","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 27, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I just have a quick question: I am a lady of 31 years and my boyfriend is 32 years old. We are both working and studying. I am Zulu and he is Venda. Our cultures are not the same. The Vendas pay a lobola, but the Zulu people\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24928","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=24928"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24928\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=24928"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=24928"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=24928"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}