How can I deal with the criticism of my friends and my own family when sometimes I get annoyed and a little angry. They always say something like, “You’re a Christian and you are acting like that?” or “You’re supposed to be holy and you are acting like that?” Even when I don’t respond back to what they say, it really bothers me, and I feel like I don’t want to be bothered with them anymore. But I keep my composure most of the time because if I lash out at them that’s what Satan wants me to do. I forgive them, but what they say is stuck in my head. It’s like they expect me to be perfect, which I am certainly not.<\/p>\n\t
If you can, just for a moment, separate your annoyances from what is really happening. I’m guessing that whatever recently happened, you know you did wrong since you agree that you are not perfect. What appears to be bothering you is that non-Christians are pointing out those flaws and holding you to a higher standard than they hold themselves. You resent the inconsistency.<\/p>\n
If, then, my guess is correct, how should it be handled?<\/p>\n
If you are doing wrong, then you should work on stopping. Wrong remains wrong regardless of who is pointing out the problem. “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us<\/em>” (I John 1:8-10).<\/p>\n Because of your anger, you are overlooking an important point: these people think that Christians ought to be better than the average person. Is it bad that they hold some respect for Christians? “You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven<\/em>” (Matthew 5:14-16).<\/p>\n Often people taunt a Christian for living to a higher standard because they know that they are not. They want to pull a Christian down to their level. In a sense, it is a “See, being a Christian isn’t that important because you aren’t any better than I am.” In this, the teaser finds justification for his own sins. Yet, there is a subtle trap here. In your reaction, you are beginning to think “well, no one is perfect.” It is true, but is it a Christian’s goal to be satisfied with imperfections? If we allow ourselves to accept sin in our lives, then the standard is lowered. Others then aren’t motivated to do as well, and soon the standard slips downward again. “Therefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and rest your hope fully upon the grace that is to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ; as obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lusts, as in your ignorance; but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, because it is written, “Be holy, for I am holy”<\/em>” (I Peter 1:13-16). None of us will ever be as holy as God, so should God come down to our level? Of course not! Our striving to reach God’s level makes us better people.<\/p>\n Understand, too, that on some level they are a bit jealous of what you’ve obtained so far. If they point out a flaw in yourself, pull the wind out of the sails by saying, “You’re right. I need to work on that.” Then you will seem to be more on their level, but you are acknowledging that both of you need to reach higher. “Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers<\/em>” (Ephesians 4:29).<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Question: How can I deal with the criticism of my friends and my own family when sometimes I get annoyed and a little angry. They always say something like, “You’re a Christian and you are acting like that?” or “You’re supposed to be holy and you are acting like that?” Even when I don’t respond…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[794],"class_list":["post-24348","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-criticism"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":38617,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/was-i-too-impatient-when-i-gave-my-mother-constructive-criticism\/","url_meta":{"origin":24348,"position":0},"title":"Was I too impatient when I gave my mother constructive criticism?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 24, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I am really into Christianity and trying to learn and grow, but they still seem to be rather worldly. I am trying to lead by example, but I wonder if that is enough. The knowledge that they could die at any time makes me want to be rather\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":68260,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/when-am-i-acting-as-the-judge\/","url_meta":{"origin":24348,"position":1},"title":"When am I acting as the Judge?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"June 5, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello Brother, I hope you're doing well by God's grace. Thank you so much for your time.\u00a0Please, I have a question. On one of the web pages of a church of Christ, the question is asked, \"Are my parents lost because they did not practice the things you teach?\"\u00a0The\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":68962,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/being-corrected-and-correcting-others\/","url_meta":{"origin":24348,"position":2},"title":"Being Corrected and Correcting Others","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 22, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"by Jerry Falk Throughout the years, I have been corrected about shortcomings in my life, and today, I can confidently say that I am a better person for it! I thank God for the painful moments when His word has cut me to the heart (Hebrews 4:12; Acts 2:37), even\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Article"","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":90599,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/college-campus-topics\/","url_meta":{"origin":24348,"position":3},"title":"College Campus Topics","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 17, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"by Perry Hall Being All-Powerful Is an Impossibility \"Being all-powerful is an impossibility. For example, can God create a rock so large he cannot lift it?\" This question was asked on the college campus. I responded that this is a self-contradictory question and does not follow the laws of logic.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Article"","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":62355,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/everyones-a-critic\/","url_meta":{"origin":24348,"position":4},"title":"Everyone’s a Critic","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 29, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Proverbs 9:7-12 \u00a0 I.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Everyone faces days when it feels as if nothing is going right. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0A.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0People find fault with what you do and you think that nothing can please them. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0B.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Criticism, justified or not, isn\u2019t pleasant to receive \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a01.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cYou\u2019re not doing that right.\u201d \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a02.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u201cYou should\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Audio"","block_context":{"text":"Audio","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/audio\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":16400,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-reach-out-to-my-atheist-roommate\/","url_meta":{"origin":24348,"position":5},"title":"How do I reach out to my atheist roommate?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 18, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Well, recently I have moved into college as a freshman. Now, the person I'm rooming with is a friend I've had through high school. He calls himself an atheist. Now, I'm not exactly sure if he is a true atheist or not. He doesn't actively protest God and go\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24348","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=24348"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24348\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=24348"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=24348"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=24348"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}