{"id":24083,"date":"2020-07-25T14:56:04","date_gmt":"2020-07-25T19:56:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=24083"},"modified":"2020-08-03T15:36:38","modified_gmt":"2020-08-03T20:36:38","slug":"should-i-tell-my-boyfriend-that-ive-had-sex-with-my-cousin","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-tell-my-boyfriend-that-ive-had-sex-with-my-cousin\/","title":{"rendered":"Should I tell my boyfriend that I&#8217;ve had sex with my cousin?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\t<h2>Question:<\/h2>\n<p>Hello,<\/p>\n<p>I need help. I am a young lady. I have a good obedient boyfriend. He is loyal, faithful, and respects me. We have dated for five years now. He has not asked me for sex, for which I am proud of him. The problem now is that my cousin lives with me at my parents&#8217; house. He and I have fallen for each other and we ended up fornicating. He broke my virginity countless times. Whenever I tell him to stop he says he will die if I leave him. I am so mad with myself for cheating on my boyfriend and for sinning. Should I tell my boyfriend? I feel disgusted that I can&#8217;t even pray. Will God ever forgive me?<\/p>\n<p>Please help.<\/p>\n\t<h2>Answer:<\/h2>\n<p>Notice that the things you admire about your boyfriend are all things that you are not. Nowhere in your note do you indicate that you&#8217;ve put an end to sexual acts you are doing with your cousin. Instead, you pretend that these sexual acts are because you love your cousin.<\/p>\n<p>Your boyfriend needs to know what you have been doing because he currently thinks he is dating someone like himself. He needs to decide whether he is willing to risk marrying a woman who is not faithful to him.<\/p>\n<p>In regards to God, forgiveness requires that you first repent of your sins (II Corinthians 7:10-11). Repentance is not sorrow. Repentance is both a change in behavior and a change in attitude toward sin. In this case, repentance is refusing to have sex until after you get married; whether it is to your cousin, your current boyfriend, or someone else. Repentance is not justifying what you have done but admitting just how wrong it was in God&#8217;s sight.<\/p>\n\t<h2>Question:<\/h2>\n<p>Thank you. I have repented. I want to walk with Christ. How should I go about it?<\/p>\n\t<h2>Answer:<\/h2>\n<p>First, make sure you are truly a Christian as defined in the Bible. See\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-to-become-a-christian\/\">How to Become a Christian<\/a>. Second, talk to your boyfriend and let him know that you are not a virgin, that you regret your sin, and that you have changed.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Question: Hello, I need help. I am a young lady. I have a good obedient boyfriend. He is loyal, faithful, and respects me. We have dated for five years now. He has not asked me for sex, for which I am proud of him. The problem now is that my cousin lives with me at&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[1572],"class_list":["post-24083","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-fornication"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":11036,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-tell-my-boyfriend-about-my-promiscuous-past\/","url_meta":{"origin":24083,"position":0},"title":"Should I tell my boyfriend about my promiscuous past?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 10, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have started dating a very godly man. While I am now a devoted Christian who will not get into any physical relationship until marriage, I did have sex in the past. You have no idea how much I regret my past and wish I could undo it but\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":30251,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-gain-control-over-my-sexual-desire\/","url_meta":{"origin":24083,"position":1},"title":"How do I gain control over my sexual desire?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 16, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I need help. I have been with my boyfriend for over two years. I love him very much, and soon he is going to ask my parents for my hand. I've always had a crush on this guy. He's actually the stepson of my uncle. Since I met him\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":41966,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-i-need-to-tell-future-boyfriends-that-i-sinned-sexually-in-the-past\/","url_meta":{"origin":24083,"position":2},"title":"Do I need to tell future boyfriends that I sinned sexually in the past?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 25, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I am 29 years old. I came to know Jesus when I was 15. I have waited almost half of my life to have a boyfriend because I don't want to miss God's plan for my life. However, I met a guy who has a different faith, and\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":42518,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-tell-my-ex-boyfriend-how-i-hate-him-and-myself-for-having-sex\/","url_meta":{"origin":24083,"position":3},"title":"Should I tell my ex-boyfriend how I hate him and myself for having sex?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 9, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I have a question. I have had sex with my ex-boyfriend, and I just can't get over it. I know that I have sinned, I asked God for forgiveness, and I know that God has forgiven me. However, every time I think of my ex-boyfriend, it is so\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":20458,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-boyfriend-said-he-wont-have-sex-with-me-before-marriage-but-then-he-gave-me-a-handjob-what-should-i-do\/","url_meta":{"origin":24083,"position":4},"title":"My boyfriend said he won&#8217;t have sex with me before marriage, but then he gave me a handjob. What should I do?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 13, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I am 23 years old and have been dating a 31-year-old guy for four months now. At first, there was no problem, but after a few days, he started showing a desire to have sex. Honestly, this is my first boyfriend in my life and I didn't know anything\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":43162,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-it-bad-that-i-left-my-boyfriend-because-we-dont-believe-the-same-things\/","url_meta":{"origin":24083,"position":5},"title":"Is it bad that I left my boyfriend because we don&#8217;t believe the same things?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 7, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Good day sir, I have this guilt that keeps haunting me. I started having pre-marital sex which eventually led to me getting pregnant. Because I come from a religious family, I decided to have an abortion so that I didn't bring shame, disgrace, and pain to my family. I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24083","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=24083"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/24083\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=24083"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=24083"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=24083"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}