I am a woman who has had an affair. I am really feeling convicted about many things when it comes to fixing the mess I have made of my life.<\/p>\n
I have been married three times. I got pregnant when I was 17 and married the father of my child. That marriage lasted for several years. I had an affair before that marriage ended. I got married again to another man and that marriage lasted only a year. Then I met another man and after several months of dating, we got married. It has been many years now that we have been married.<\/p>\n
I think you can see a pattern in my marriages. Not one of them did I prayerfully give consideration to. As I look back I see I act on emotion too much. All of these men I had sex with before marriage. I want to put God first in my life and do what He would have me to do. Do I work on the marriage? How do I know that God joined us together? The man that I am with now wants to live for God also. We want to glorify God in our individual lives and also as a couple. Is this possible? Any advice would be helpful as I am really trying to make God the center of all my choices now and a lot of things I read are confusing (including the Scripture).<\/p>\n\t
Notes like yours sadden me because I can’t give you an answer that will satisfy you. You didn’t have an affair, you had a long series of affairs. I take it that your marriages did not end because your husbands were unfaithful to the marriage covenants. I get the impression that it was more because of your own unfaithfulness to the marriages.<\/p>\n
Jesus stated, “And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery<\/em>” (Matthew 19:9). Because your former marriages did not end because of sexual infidelity on the part of your partner, it means you are still bound by your marriage covenant. That being the cause you and the man you are currently married to are committing adultery.<\/p>\n If you want to live righteously, then you will have to end the adulterous relationship. You have no right to marry again until your original husband dies (Romans 7:2-3).<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Question: I am a woman who has had an affair. I am really feeling convicted about many things when it comes to fixing the mess I have made of my life. I have been married three times. I got pregnant when I was 17 and married the father of my child. That marriage lasted for…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[66,167],"class_list":["post-23729","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-adultery","tag-divorce"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":32286,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-husband-blames-me-for-his-adulteries-and-our-divorce-how-do-i-move-past-this\/","url_meta":{"origin":23729,"position":0},"title":"My husband blames me for his adulteries and our divorce. How do I move past this?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 26, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I'm really torn about my divorce. My husband left me for another woman, divorced me, and married her. I'm still crushed after several years. Our marriage started out poorly. We had pre-marital sex and I even had an abortion. A few months before we got married, I had sex\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":31393,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/as-i-grow-in-the-lord-i-find-i-am-struggling-with-my-past-and-current-sins\/","url_meta":{"origin":23729,"position":1},"title":"As I grow in the Lord, I find I am struggling with my past and current sins","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 21, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, my brother in Christ, I have been a member of the church for a number of years. 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This young man got a young girl pregnant.\u00a0 They were together off and on for a couple of years.\u00a0 They applied for a marriage license but did not follow through.\u00a0 They applied the second time\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":16286,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/if-a-person-is-married-under-false-pretenses-is-it-still-a-valid-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":23729,"position":3},"title":"If a person is married under false pretenses, is it still a valid marriage?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 6, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Does the Bible mention false marriages or are all marriages valid? This year alone, three women who escaped from Michigan prisons more than thirty years ago have been captured and returned to Michigan. One woman who has received a lot of attention moved to California, changed her name, got\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":18558,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-had-an-affair-and-divorced-my-husband-now-i-have-married-again-is-it-wrong-to-stay-married-to-this-second-man\/","url_meta":{"origin":23729,"position":4},"title":"I had an affair and divorced my husband. Now I have married again. Is it wrong to stay married to this second man?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 2, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I know divorce is wrong. I know adultery is wrong. I have committed adultery, got a divorce and I have remarried to a man that I had an affair with. He and I both go to church now and we both know we have sinned and have asked for\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":44878,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-havent-been-faithful-in-my-marriage-but-i-cant-stop-thinking-about-what-my-wife-did-before-our-marriage\/","url_meta":{"origin":23729,"position":5},"title":"I haven’t been faithful in my marriage, but I can’t stop thinking about what my wife did before our marriage","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"March 17, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My wife cheated on me in the first month of our relationship while we were dating. She confessed to me immediately. I know she was really sorry, though I myself was sleeping around at the time too. 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