{"id":23304,"date":"2010-05-09T22:07:00","date_gmt":"2010-05-10T03:07:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?p=23304"},"modified":"2020-06-10T22:09:22","modified_gmt":"2020-06-11T03:09:22","slug":"how-do-i-make-my-relationship-more-god-centered","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-make-my-relationship-more-god-centered\/","title":{"rendered":"How do I make my relationship more God-centered?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\t<h2>Question:<\/h2>\n<p>I know romantic relationships should be God-centered, but I&#8217;m having trouble doing this with my boyfriend. He&#8217;s a Christian, but not too strong of a Christian. I tried to put God into our relationship by suggesting reading a Bible chapter together each day. We read only two times. I wanted to pray with him a lot together, but that&#8217;s lessened too, and I&#8217;m always the one to bring up praying. He&#8217;s a really close friend and we have a great relationship, except it&#8217;s less &#8220;God-centered.&#8221; How do I try to make it God-centered?<\/p>\n\t<h2>Answer:<\/h2>\n<p>Dating is supposed to be time two people spend getting to know who the other person is. As you get to know a person, you may find out that he isn&#8217;t quite the person you expected or hoped he would be. But then we struggle with ourselves. You don&#8217;t want to admit that you made a mistake. So the person tries dealing with the problem by either ignoring it, hoping it will go away or by trying to fix the other person.<\/p>\n<p>Young women are especially susceptible to wanting to fix their man. People do change, but lasting change comes from within the person, not because it was imposed on them. You want a person who is more interested in reading the Bible and praying. But the truth is that your boyfriend isn&#8217;t interested in either of those things. He may become interested one day, but it won&#8217;t be because you insist that he read his Bible or pray with you. What is more likely to happen is that the harder you push, the harder he will resist those things.<\/p>\n<p>What you have to do is decide if this is the type of man you want at your side for the rest of your life. You have to look at him as he is, not at who you think you might mold him into being. When a woman does the latter, she is gambling. A man might change, or he might not. If he changes, it is because he wants to change, not because others make him change. So when choosing a mate, you need to decide that if he never changes, that you still want to be with him. If you don&#8217;t do this, you will be miserable with your choice.<\/p>\n<p>Your greatest way to encourage change is through your example. That is why Peter said, &#8220;<em>Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives<\/em>&#8221; (I Peter 3:1). Your actions will speak far louder and clearer than all the words you might use. If you want God to play a bigger role in your life, then you spend more time reading God&#8217;s word and praying. If he joins you, wonderful! But if he doesn&#8217;t care, then you need to start thinking about the future.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Question: I know romantic relationships should be God-centered, but I&#8217;m having trouble doing this with my boyfriend. He&#8217;s a Christian, but not too strong of a Christian. I tried to put God into our relationship by suggesting reading a Bible chapter together each day. We read only two times. I wanted to pray with him&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[149],"class_list":["post-23304","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-dating"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":38663,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-we-move-near-each-other-before-getting-married\/","url_meta":{"origin":23304,"position":0},"title":"Should we move near each other before getting married?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 27, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I need some advice. You see, my girlfriend and I have been friends for a while. We prayed together and made sure we were the ones for each other before we did anything. Our relationship is definitely God-centered. It's so amazing! But we are in a long-distance relationship.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":88939,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/the-first-beatitude-in-psalms\/","url_meta":{"origin":23304,"position":1},"title":"The First Beatitude in Psalms","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 26, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"by Warren E. Berkley The book of Psalms opens with a beatitude. \"Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor stands in the path of sinners, nor sits in the seat of the scornful,\" (Psalms 1:1). This is a description of a life centered\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Article&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Article","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/article\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":46155,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/will-god-restore-our-relationship\/","url_meta":{"origin":23304,"position":2},"title":"Will God restore our relationship?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 10, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I committed serious sexual sins with my girlfriend over the last 4 years. We broke up recently. I want to truly and deeply repent for my sexual sins. How can I be washed clean because my sins are great? I hear a call to repentance. Will God restore my\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":40189,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/should-i-stay-with-my-fiance-or-go-with-the-guy-i-recently-met\/","url_meta":{"origin":23304,"position":3},"title":"Should I stay with my fiance or go with the guy I recently met?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 12, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Please bear with me as this is long. While searching for my answer I stumbled across one of your previous questions that were somewhat similar, so I decided to write you. I met my now fiance over five years ago when I was at a low point in my\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":36730,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-know-we-did-things-wrong-but-how-can-i-get-my-boyfriend-back\/","url_meta":{"origin":23304,"position":4},"title":"I know we did things wrong, but how can I get my boyfriend back?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 24, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, I really wanted your opinion on my relationship. My boyfriend and I had dated for almost two years. He broke up with me about a week ago. I am devastated. I always thought that he and I could get through anything. I admit we argued a lot, mostly\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":24552,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/is-my-fiance-a-real-christian\/","url_meta":{"origin":23304,"position":5},"title":"Is my fiance a real Christian?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 17, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I've been dating for a year, and now I'm engaged, but it still will take two years for us to marry. My fiance and I have strong sexual temptations, it seems like I have a lot more control than him. Sometimes it scares me because he seems to want\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Answer&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23304","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23304"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23304\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23304"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=23304"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=23304"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}