If a Christian sister falls into formication with a brother who is engaged, and both have sincerely repented, is it necessary for the sister to call the brother’s fianc\u00e9e to apologize as a form of restitution?\u00a0 Does the brother need to tell his fianc\u00e9e and show her the sister he fornicated with? Is it advisable for the sister to attend his wedding that is taking place within a few months of the incident?<\/p>\n\t
The man needs to tell his fiancee that he committed fornication because this impacts her decision regarding whether she wants to continue with the marriage or not. She does not need to know the details of who he had sex with or how many times. She will likely want to know why it happened. Very likely she will want to delay the marriage or call it off completely because he has demonstrated that he cannot remain faithful to his commitments.<\/p>\n
This has nothing to do with restitution. A person is forgiven when they repent and change their behavior. But sin often has repercussions. I assume that he and his fiancee have discussed their sexual past and she has an expectation at marriage that he has remained pure during their engagement. Thus, she needs a chance to decide what to do with this new information. For her to discover it after their marriage will rightly cause her to feel she was trapped because he did not tell her.<\/p>\n
The woman he had sex with also repented, but it does the fiancee no good to know who her fiance committed fornication with. Rather, it will cause strained relationships in the future if they ever meet. The woman should decline to attend the wedding if it takes place. Her presence will cause hard feelings and awkwardness.<\/p>\n\t
Thank you, sir, for the response. Please sir, one more question from the answer you gave. Is it necessary for the sister to call the brother to confirm whether he has told his fianc\u00e9e about what happened? What she wants to do what is right and clear her conscience. If he has not done that, she wants to encourage him to do so since the marriage is in a few days. Sir, that is why I said it is urgent.<\/p>\n
The sister said she was diagnosed with hepatitis B. She doesn’t know whether to ask the brother to go and check his status, even though they did not have sex. They were involved in kissing and romance. She has been crying to God that the brother should not test positive since she is the one that caused everything. It was an act of the sister’s frustration. The brother was trying to help out, but he fell into temptation. The sister has been dying of guilt. Sin is really heavy.<\/p>\n
Please, sir, we need your help in this situation.<\/p>\n\t
According to the United States health organization, “Hepatitis B is not spread through sneezing, coughing, hugging, or breastfeeding. Although the virus can be found in saliva, it is not believed to be spread through kissing or sharing utensils.” [When Someone Close To You Has Chronic Hepatitis B – CDC<\/a>]. WebMD goes a bit further: “The chance of transmission with deep kissing is unknown, as no infections have been definitively documented after exposure to infected saliva. Yet, since HBV has been found in saliva, the risk of transmission with deep kissing probably exists, and the risk increases if one partner wears orthodontic braces or has open cuts or sores in the mouth” [Hepatitis and Sex: Frequently Asked Questions<\/a>]. I would conclude from this that the odds of his picking up Hepatitis B is low.<\/p>\n It is not the woman’s responsibility to make sure that the man does the right thing. She needs to disconnect from him. Though she feels responsible, God states that sexual sins are individual choices.\u00a0 “Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body<\/em>” (I Corinthians 6:18). He is responsible for the bad choices he made, just as she is responsible for her own bad choices.<\/p>\n\t Thank you, sir, for being a voice for Christ in our generation. May the Lord grant you more grace to continue to labor for Him in restoring perishing souls back to God. I am grateful for your answers. Under God, remain blessed and lifted. Amen.<\/p>\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Question: If a Christian sister falls into formication with a brother who is engaged, and both have sincerely repented, is it necessary for the sister to call the brother’s fianc\u00e9e to apologize as a form of restitution?\u00a0 Does the brother need to tell his fianc\u00e9e and show her the sister he fornicated with? Is it…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[1571,1572,50],"class_list":["post-19157","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-forgiveness","tag-fornication","tag-repentance"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":34506,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-fiancee-is-having-trouble-forgiving-me-for-my-past-sexual-sins\/","url_meta":{"origin":19157,"position":0},"title":"My fiancee is having trouble forgiving me for my past sexual sins","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 27, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I am having an issue with my engagement. Before I met my fiancee I was not a Christian. I had had sex with multiple partners. My fiancee, at times, has trouble forgiving me for these past sins. What can I do to help her? I know I've hurt her\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":43846,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/am-i-being-selfish-and-covetous-in-marrying-a-woman-who-had-a-child-by-another-man\/","url_meta":{"origin":19157,"position":1},"title":"Am I being selfish and covetous in marrying a woman who had a child by another man?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 6, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Greetings, I met my fianc\u00e9e last year and we became friends. We go to the same church. Later we decided to pray and ask God if we should get married and we did get confirmation. So we went to our pastor and told him of our decision. We are\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":38070,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-i-return-to-god-after-committing-fornication\/","url_meta":{"origin":19157,"position":2},"title":"How do I return to God after committing fornication?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 21, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Good morning, Thanks for all you do for singles all over the world -- taking questions and giving wisdom-filled answers. God will keep blessing you. I have a huge problem. I'm a leader in my local assembly, and I've been engaging in the sin of fornication with my wife-to-be\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":47110,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-we-handle-the-mother-of-my-fiancees-former-boyfriend\/","url_meta":{"origin":19157,"position":3},"title":"How do we handle the mother of my fianc\u00e9e’s former boyfriend?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"February 8, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hello, My fianc\u00e9e and I are getting married soon.\u00a0 Recently, her grandfather has been going through trouble with cancer.\u00a0 It has brought up a few encouraging text messages. Here's where my problem begins.\u00a0 One of the encouraging texts comes repetitively from the same person.\u00a0 That person is the mother\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":51315,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/do-i-need-to-tell-my-fiancee-that-ive-been-having-sex-with-other-women-during-our-engagement\/","url_meta":{"origin":19157,"position":4},"title":"Do I need to tell my fianc\u00e9e that I’ve been having sex with other women during our engagement?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 8, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have been into several relationships in the past, but none is as great as the one I am currently in. The problem is that I have not been able to maintain sexual purity for the past several years after I became sexually active. Currently, I am nearly 30\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":51816,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/did-i-act-too-fast-when-i-broke-up-with-my-fiancee-because-she-was-seeing-other-men\/","url_meta":{"origin":19157,"position":5},"title":"Did I act too fast when I broke up with my fianc\u00e9e because she was seeing other men?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 26, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I'm in my thirties and my fianc\u00e9e is in her twenties. I've been in a relationship for three years with her, and we got engaged. 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