My ex-boyfriend passed away seven years ago and I still think of him, especially on his birthday, which happens to fall on Valentine’s day, February 14th. I know he is in heaven, but just today something just keeps bothering me, like I’m unsure whether he is in heaven or hell. I feel like I really want to know where he is because I think of him too much.<\/p>\n\t
Neither you nor I are his judge. Where he spends eternity is up to the righteous and merciful Judge of all the world. God judges not only deeds but also the thoughts and motivations behind those deeds — something that no man can do. “Therefore judge nothing before the time, until the Lord comes, who will both bring to light the hidden things of darkness and reveal the counsels of the hearts. Then each one’s praise will come from God<\/em>” (I Corinthians 4:5).<\/p>\n Wherever a person ends up, we can be confident that the decision was fair and just. We know that if a person ends up in torments, he certainly doesn’t want his loved ones to follow him. “Then he said, ‘I beg you therefore, father, that you would send him to my father’s house, for I have five brothers, that he may testify to them, lest they also come to this place of torment.’<\/em>” (Luke 16:27-28). If he is in paradise, then there is joy awaiting in joining him there. Notice what David said about an infant son of his who died,\u00a0 “Then his servants said to him, “What is this that you have done? You fasted and wept for the child while he was alive, but when the child died, you arose and ate food.” And he said, “While the child was alive, I fasted and wept; for I said, ‘Who can tell whether the LORD will be gracious to me, that the child may live?’\u00a0 But now he is dead; why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me”<\/em>” (II Samuel 12:21-23).<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Question: My ex-boyfriend passed away seven years ago and I still think of him, especially on his birthday, which happens to fall on Valentine’s day, February 14th. I know he is in heaven, but just today something just keeps bothering me, like I’m unsure whether he is in heaven or hell. I feel like I…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[20],"tags":[109,410],"class_list":["post-14191","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-answer","tag-death","tag-judgment"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":3330,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/will-catholics-go-to-hell\/","url_meta":{"origin":14191,"position":0},"title":"Will Catholics go to hell?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 22, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Will Catholics go to hell? Answer: \"Therefore you are inexcusable, O man, whoever you are who judge, for in whatever you judge another you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things. But we know that the judgment of God is according to truth against those who\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":90831,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-much-should-we-judge\/","url_meta":{"origin":14191,"position":1},"title":"How much should we judge?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"September 27, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I know that it is not our job to decide who goes to heaven or hell. Still, my boyfriend says that my family will not be saved because God will not accept the worship that they offer, because they are using instruments and teaching false lessons, such as once\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":38624,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/if-i-want-something-so-badly-that-i-think-i-would-be-willing-to-go-to-hell-to-get-it-and-then-i-do-get-it-will-i-end-up-in-hell\/","url_meta":{"origin":14191,"position":2},"title":"If I want something so badly that I think I would be willing to go to hell to get it, and then I do get it, will I end up in hell?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"April 24, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Hi, I've been very scared of not going to heaven and going to hell. When I really want something, I sometimes think I would burn in hell just to have it happen. It sometimes actually does happen, and it really scares me because I thought I'd burn in hell\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":88674,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/why-would-babies-who-die-be-judged\/","url_meta":{"origin":14191,"position":3},"title":"Why would babies who die be judged?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"July 14, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have a question about infants, aborted and miscarried souls, and the judgment. Are they awaiting judgment? Would there be any reason to judge them? I have had several miscarried babies, and it's just something I've been wondering about, even though I know where they're going\/have gone. Thank you\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":35822,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-boyfriend-committed-adultery-and-is-now-divorced-am-i-doomed-if-i-marry-him\/","url_meta":{"origin":14191,"position":4},"title":"My boyfriend committed adultery and is now divorced. Am I doomed if I marry him?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 14, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: This is hard for me to come out and ask this, and I need this answer because I think my salvation is very important. I'm young and I mean 21. I have not been married and met a man. We have been together for about two years. He loves\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":7517,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/would-an-atheist-be-saved-if-he-did-good-deeds-during-his-life\/","url_meta":{"origin":14191,"position":5},"title":"Would an atheist be saved if he did good deeds during his life?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 2, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: If an atheist has always done good deeds during his life (abided by God\u00b4s rules preached by all religions), where would God (if there is any) allocate him after his death -- heaven or hell? I personally believe that God, being so gracious as we have been told, will\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Answer"","block_context":{"text":"Answer","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/answer\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14191","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=14191"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14191\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=14191"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=14191"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=14191"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}