Thank you for a great site. I have one question. I have three children: two girls (ages 15 and 9) and a boy (age 12). One of my daughters asked permission to sleepover at one of her girlfriend’s home. I contacted the girlfriend’s mother and informed her about my daughter’s bedtime. She was very surprised and told me that her child stays up much later than my children do. We then had a little discussion about this. What time do you suggest the proper bedtime should be?<\/p>\n\t
Children need adequate sleep to function well and to grow properly. But the number of hours a particular child needs will vary with each child. The average school-age child needs nine hours of sleep, but that is only an average. Some children function well with less and others require more. Once a child reaches puberty, his body will demand about an hour more sleep per night as his body goes through the changes into adulthood.<\/p>\n
How much time does your child need? Pick a week or two where there is no particular demand on your time, such as during a vacation. Get the kids to bed at a regular time, but let them wake up on their own. Don’t count the first few days as they adjust to the new schedule, but after a few days, take note of how long they sleep. This will give you a rough idea of how much time your particular children need each night.<\/p>\n
Having a fixed bedtime helps a child sleep better. The body has a natural cycle and it will adjust to the demands of the environment. If a child is used to going to bed at 9 p.m. each night, then as 9 p.m. approaches, his body will start the process needed to fall asleep. The major difficulty is that the cycle usually becomes skewed during adolescents. Teenagers have trouble falling asleep at their usual bedtime. The answer is that they should still head off to bed at their usual time, but take something quiet to do until they do fall asleep.<\/p>\n
What time is the best bedtime? It all depends on what works best in your household. For example, in my home since Bible studies tend to occur in the evenings and we now have a house full of teenagers, things usually don’t start winding down until 11 p.m. Since we home school, we just let the kids (and us) sleep a bit later, so the house isn’t going again until 8 or 9 a.m. Yet I remember when the children were young and would wake up at dawn. In those days we were in bed before 9 p.m. so that we all could get enough sleep.<\/p>\n
Whatever works best in your home is what you should use. It doesn’t matter if someone else has a different schedule. But what is important is that you keep it regular. You don’t want wild swings of early to bed one day and late to bed the next. Everyone is going to end up sleep-deprived and grouchy.<\/p>\n
Having said all of this, it is not reasonable to ask another family to change their schedule to match your household. If your daughter is visiting a friend, she should strive to follow the rules of that household while she is there. If she stays up later than she normally does, oh well, she’ll be a bit weary the next day and can sleep a bit later another day to catch back up; but that is part of the “fun” of staying at someone else’s home.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Question: Thank you for a great site. I have one question. I have three children: two girls (ages 15 and 9) and a boy (age 12). One of my daughters asked permission to sleepover at one of her girlfriend’s home. I contacted the girlfriend’s mother and informed her about my daughter’s bedtime. She was very…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1033,1028,1032],"tags":[1046,665,29,107],"class_list":["post-13917","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adolescence","category-parenting","category-preteen","tag-bedtime","tag-child-rearing","tag-parenting","tag-raising-children"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":14088,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-much-sleep-do-teenagers-need-i-cant-seem-to-get-mine-to-wake-up-in-the-morning\/","url_meta":{"origin":13917,"position":0},"title":"How much sleep do teenagers need? I can’t seem to get mine to wake up in the morning","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 25, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have heard varying studies on the amount of sleep that kids, and even adults, need to function in the day.\u00a0 My two remaining children are not morning people unless there is something they really want to do!\u00a0 I really think they may need more sleep. In contemplating how\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Adolescence"","block_context":{"text":"Adolescence","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/adolescence\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":13956,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/my-nine-year-old-son-doesnt-want-to-sleep-in-his-own-bedroom\/","url_meta":{"origin":13917,"position":1},"title":"My nine-year-old son doesn’t want to sleep in his own bedroom","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 24, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: My nine-year-old son doesn't want to sleep in his own bedroom. Is this good for his self-esteem? Answer: Self-esteem is just a nicer way to discuss pride (see Self-Esteem for more information). A Christian parent should not be concerned with developing or maintaining a child's pride. The question should\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parenting"","block_context":{"text":"Parenting","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":14112,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-you-handle-a-child-with-add-or-adhd\/","url_meta":{"origin":13917,"position":2},"title":"How do you handle a child with ADD or ADHD?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 25, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: A Christian friend has a child that has been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD. I keep this child once a week and I have several questions for those of you who are familiar with ADD or ADHD. The mother doesn't want to give me much information because she feels\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Childhood"","block_context":{"text":"Childhood","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/childhood\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":63220,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/parenting-toddlers-love-and-security\/","url_meta":{"origin":13917,"position":3},"title":"Parenting Toddlers: Love and Security","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 11, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Proverbs 3:13-26 \u00a0 I.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Toddlers \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0A.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0A wonderful age. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a01.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Everything is a new and fresh delight \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a02.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Curious about everything \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0a.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Often into things forbidden, not because of maliciousness \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0b.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0But curiosity with what is behind this, with what happens with that? \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0B.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Beginnings of communications \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a01.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Relief! You now have clues\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Audio"","block_context":{"text":"Audio","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/audio\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":14063,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/i-have-a-teenager-who-would-sleep-in-bed-all-day-if-i-let-him\/","url_meta":{"origin":13917,"position":4},"title":"I have a teenager who would sleep in bed all day if I let him","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 25, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: I have a sixteen-year-old boy who would just about spend all day in bed if I let him. He claims he needs twelve to fifteen hours of sleep each day, but I think something else is going on. Any advice? Answer: During a child's growth spurt, their bodies do\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Adolescence"","block_context":{"text":"Adolescence","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/adolescence\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":13837,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/how-do-you-handle-difficulties-in-getting-a-toddler-to-brush-her-teeth\/","url_meta":{"origin":13917,"position":5},"title":"How do you handle difficulties in getting a toddler to brush her teeth?","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"October 23, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: How do you handle difficulties in getting a toddler to brush her teeth? Answer: I asked several women in the church, and the following is a composite of their responses. Most small children go through a stage where they don't want to brush their teeth. Most of the time\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parenting"","block_context":{"text":"Parenting","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/category\/parenting\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13917","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=13917"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/13917\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=13917"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=13917"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=13917"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}