{"id":8170,"date":"2006-08-23T14:58:01","date_gmt":"2006-08-23T19:58:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/?page_id=8170"},"modified":"2019-08-30T14:56:31","modified_gmt":"2019-08-30T19:56:31","slug":"love","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/bible-studies\/preparation-for-a-lifetime\/love\/","title":{"rendered":"Love"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\t<h1>Love<\/h1>\n<p>A husband is also responsible for providing love to his wife (Ephesians 5:25). The word translated love in this passage is the Greek word\u00a0<i>agape<\/i>.\u00a0<i>Agape<\/i>\u00a0is a love that serves, or a devotion to the one being loved. The example given is the love Christ had for the church. Jesus loved us so much that he was willing to die so we could have salvation. Yet remember this: Christ died for us while we were enemies of God (Romans 5:8). The love that a husband must have for his wife is one that is constant. It must be a devotion to his wife that remains\u00a0<i>even if it is not returned<\/i>.<\/p>\n<p>This is a hard pill to swallow. It is easy to love someone who loves you, but can you love someone who isn\u2019t speaking to you? \u201c<i>If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them<\/i>\u201d (Luke 6:32). Before the wedding, we imagine the continual bliss married life will bring us. Being married is wonderful, but put two people in the same house for a length of time and there are bound to be disagreements. Consider how many spats you had with your parents and siblings when you were growing up. The bumps in the road of life don\u2019t go away just because you are married.<\/p>\n<p>When a husband and wife have a disagreement, it is the husband\u2019s responsibility to make the first move toward resolution. I am not saying that the husband must always give in to his wife\u2019s demands. If that were the case, the wife would be the head of the family. The two of you might not agree on some point. You might have just finished the biggest argument in the history of marriage. You might have even been right. But it is the husband who needs to be willing to step back and say, \u201cLet\u2019s stop fighting. I love you too much to be yelling at you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I remember one young husband who came to me after a fight with his wife. He was frustrated because she wouldn\u2019t come to church with him that evening. What amazed him was that the fight started over such a minor thing and he couldn\u2019t understand how it escalated into such a major battle. I told him to stop at a nearby grocery store that sold flowers, pick up a small bouquet and present it to his wife when he got home. \u201cBut the fight wasn\u2019t my fault,\u201d he replied shocked. \u201cIt doesn\u2019t matter whose fault it was,\u201d I told him. \u201cGive her the flowers and tell her you are sorry.\u201d \u201cBut I wasn\u2019t the one in the wrong,\u201d he said in disbelief. \u201cIt doesn\u2019t matter. You fought when you should have made peace.\u201d It took a while to convince him, but he finally agreed to give it a try. The next day he called, \u201cYou won\u2019t believe what happened! I barely got to the door when she pulled me in. We apologized and said we were sorry. It was the best night we had in weeks. You know, I can\u2019t even remember what the fight was about now.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>A husband must be willing to be the first to say \u201cI was wrong\u201d even if he feels that he is always the one saying it. Husbands cannot let their pride interfere with their duty to lead their family down the paths of righteousness.<\/p>\n<p>A relationship could be built on pure devotion, but it won\u2019t be much fun. The time husbands spend with their wives needs the spice of affection. I Corinthians 7:3 talks of the sexual duty a husband owes his wife, but sex isn\u2019t meant to be a job, it is a source of enjoyment (Proverbs 5:18-19). The enjoyment in marriage is not just in intercourse but in all of life (Ecclesiastes 9:9). A husband owes his wife affection \u2013 the expressions of endearment and the acts of kindness that lets his wife know she is the most important thing in his life. It doesn\u2019t even have to be anything major or costly. It can be the kiss and the whispered \u201cI love you\u201d when you first awake each morning. It can be the offer to change the diaper for no particular reason. Hold hands when you walk. Open the door for her. Smile when your eyes meet across the room. Hide love notes for her to find. Women form relationships based on emotions. The emotions of love and stability must be present first before physical expressions of love can be easily shown.<\/p>\n<p>And if you do these things just to get her into the mood for sex, you missed the point. Husbands should be showing their wives they care about them. If each thing you do leads to repayment in sexual intercourse, then it becomes obvious to your wife that you only care about your own satisfaction. Yes, sex is an expression of affection, but it is not the only one and it is not the most important one. I find it fascinating that the book of Song of Solomon, which has much to say about sexual relationship ends with two statements; each expressing what that person wants most. He says \u201c<i>O you who sit in the gardens, my companions are listening for your voice\u2014Let me hear it!<\/i>\u201d His greatest desire is her companionship. She says \u201c<i>Hurry, my beloved, and be like a gazelle or a young stag on the mountains of spices.<\/i>\u201d Her greatest desire is to have some fun (sex) with her husband. By the husband\u2019s desire for his wife\u2019s companionship, he lights the fire of her desire for sex. Husbands concentrate on your wife\u2019s needs and your needs will be met.<\/p>\n\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/bible-studies\/preparation-for-a-lifetime\/leadership\/\" target=\"_self\" role=\"button\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\tPrior Lesson\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/bible-studies\/preparation-for-a-lifetime\/\" target=\"_self\" role=\"button\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\tPreparation for a Lifetime\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/bible-studies\/preparation-for-a-lifetime\/nourish\/\" target=\"_self\" role=\"button\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\tNext Lesson\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Love A husband is also responsible for providing love to his wife (Ephesians 5:25). The word translated love in this passage is the Greek word\u00a0agape.\u00a0Agape\u00a0is a love that serves, or a devotion to the one being loved. The example given is the love Christ had for the church. Jesus loved us so much that he&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":8138,"menu_order":7,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-8170","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":8217,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/bible-studies\/preparation-for-a-lifetime\/companionship\/","url_meta":{"origin":8170,"position":0},"title":"Companionship","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 24, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Companionship Recall from our reading of Genesis 2:18-23 that God created the woman to be a helper suitable to the man. Men were not designed by God to live a life of isolation. They need a companion and a friend. In Titus 2:4-5, older women are asked to teach younger\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":8214,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/bible-studies\/preparation-for-a-lifetime\/respect\/","url_meta":{"origin":8170,"position":1},"title":"Respect","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 24, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Respect Paul tells us that each wife must have respect or reverence for her husband (Ephesians 5:33). The word means to give honor, respect, or obedience. The same word is used in other passages to tell all Christians to fear God. The word fear is the same word used for\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4577,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/bible-studies\/the-greatest-love-song-written-a-study-of-the-song-of-solomon\/the-art-of-repairing-a-broken-relationship\/","url_meta":{"origin":8170,"position":2},"title":"The Art of Repairing a Broken Relationship","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"May 22, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Chapter 11 The Art of Repairing a Broken Relationship We can see Shulammith almost cringing as she approaches Solomon with her head hanging down. The noblewomen are standing nearby, but not close enough to hear what she and Solomon need to say privately. Before she can open her mouth, Solomon\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/armybanners.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":40981,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/bible-studies\/pauls-letter-to-the-romans\/service-to-brethren-devotion\/","url_meta":{"origin":8170,"position":3},"title":"Service to Brethren: Devotion","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"November 20, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Service to Brethren: Devotion Proper attitude\u00a0(Romans 12:3) Proving what the will of God is demonstrated in how we treat the people around us. It is a natural result of our service to God. \"If someone says, \"I love God,\" and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":8174,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/bible-studies\/preparation-for-a-lifetime\/nourish\/","url_meta":{"origin":8170,"position":4},"title":"Nourish","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"August 23, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Nourish In Ephesians 5:28-29, Paul instructs husbands to love their wives as they love their own bodies. It is not normal for someone to abuse themselves. Generally we do things to care for ourselves. We make sure that we are adequately fed and that we are not harmed. In the\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":57865,"url":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/bible-studies\/christ-in-you-a-study-of-colossians\/relationships\/","url_meta":{"origin":8170,"position":5},"title":"Relationships (Colossians)","author":"Jeffrey Hamilton","date":"January 13, 2023","format":false,"excerpt":"Relationships Text: Colossians 3:18-4:1 Family Relationships - Colossians 3:18-21 Wives (Colossians 3:18) Paul gives a very similar statement to this one in Ephesians 5:22. If the husband is to be head of the family, then it follows that the wife is to follow her husband's lead. Paul said that submission\u2026","rel":"","context":"Similar post","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8170","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8170"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8170\/revisions"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8138"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.lavistachurchofchrist.org\/cms\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8170"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}