compulsiveness – La Vista Church of Christ

Is having OCD or anxiety a sin?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Mon, 13 Mar 2023 23:51:01 +0000

Question:

Hi,

I know you write quite a bit about OCD. I have had a diagnosis of it for well over half my life and sometimes it gets pretty bad. My questions are:

As it's anxiety or worry, is it a sin? Even writing this is a result of worry so is it a wilful sin as in Hebrews 10?
My urge to do compulsions has resulted in me lying and deceiving. For example, when I wanted to repeatedly vacuum the house, my Dad locked the vacuums away so I got family members to drive me home with their vacuum when my Dad wasn't there; thus, also involving them in the deception.

I also, strangely considering one of my worries is cleanliness, do unclean things such as not showering for months or, previously, kept putting my hands down my trousers to check so getting germs on them and then on things I touched. I am worried that this may cause or have caused harm or even death to someone and so becomes a sin.

As I cannot seem to stop compulsions, am I committing a habitual or wilful sin meaning that I'm not saved, particularly if they lead to lying? Obviously, I would love for my OCD to disappear but couldn't people, for example, some with homosexual impulses, which they act on sometimes, say that about a lot of sinful impulses?

I hope this email does not come across as too strange and that you don't mind me writing to you for advice.

Thanks for your help.

Answer:

We need to distinguish between an impulse or temptation to do something and the actual doing. A man might see a pretty woman and feel an impulse to act sexually with her. That is a temptation. But if he rejects the idea as being inappropriate and does not act on his impulse, he has not sinned. If he dwells on it and accepts the idea then he has sinned by accepting sin even though he hasn't actually acted on the idea. This is what we call "lust" (Matthew 5:28).

Some people have the predisposition to become anxious. When connected to OCD, the root cause is a strong desire not to take any risks. Thus, the person spends a great deal of time worrying about what might happen and trying to ensure that all risks are avoided. What God teaches is that you have to accept that you cannot control most of your life. Risks are bound to happen. Thus, instead of wasting time worried about the nearly infinite number of possibilities, we deal with things as they come. "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble" (Matthew 6:34). The impulse to worry will still be there, but it doesn't have to be accepted or entertained.

Is it worth spending time worrying about whether you might have purposely worried? No. Instead, you realize that worrying is bad and you take steps to focus on something else. At first, it is really hard to do because you have a lifetime of habits to overcome, but it is possible.

Lying is always wrong. There is no exception (Revelation 21:8). Yes, you had an impulse to vacuum. I assume that behind it is a vain attempt to avoid illnesses. While we should minimize the spread of illness, what you have to realize is that sickness happens in this world. If you catch something, you work at recovering from the illness.

What I've noticed in almost everyone who tells me they have OCD is that they let their emotions control their decision process. If I get a person to discuss their choices based on rational thought and God's Word, they almost always choose the right path. Thus, you need to temper your emotions with the wisdom that comes from God. "He who trusts in his own heart is a fool, but he who walks wisely will be delivered" (Proverbs 28:26).

I would guess the lack of showering and trying to check yourself for germs is also an emotional response to fears of illness and a vain attempt to keep yourself from catching an illness. Analytically, you realize that these actions don't stop diseases; instead, they increase the potential of spreading disease, which is why you've managed to stop these behaviors.

All people are tempted by impulses of one sort or another that lead them to commit sin. But the actions committed remain sinful. You have to make good choices regardless of your impulses.

What constitutes a vow?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Wed, 20 Oct 2021 21:42:11 +0000

Question:

Hi Jeffrey,

What constitutes a vow is something I've been trying to understand. Can you help me understand from the Bible why you say it's a commitment witnessed by others? It seems like these thoughts I have could be considered rash vows, or they could not be vows at all. I think of them mostly as the former, but it seems you see them as the latter.

I'm not sure what differentiates them from rash vows, and I really need to know because keeping them is making my life very difficult, so that's why I ask.

Answer:

Suppose Jill takes Joe to court. "Your honor, Joe promised to give me his car!" Before Joe can say anything, the judge asks Jill what evidence does she have that this promise was made. "Well, I don't have anything." "Did he tell you he was going to give you his car?" "Well, not really," says Jill. Puzzled, the judge asks, "What makes you think you think he should give you his car?" "He thought about it!"

Obviously, Jill's case would be thrown out of court. Even if Joe when out into the middle of the woods and said, "I am giving Jill my car." There would be no evidence that such a statement was ever made because no one hear it. Vows communicate intent or verify the truth of something. If there is no communication, then there cannot be a vow.

In today's society, some documents only require your signature. A loan application has a line on it that you promise that what you disclosed about your finances is accurate. Your signature is a witness to your promise that you told the truth. Other vows are more important. Buying a house requires that someone has witnessed you signing the document, which is why we have notaries. Weddings are witnessed by the signatures of the preacher, the best man, and the bride's maid.

Jesus pointed out, "If I alone testify about Myself, My testimony is not true" (John 5:31). This is not to say that Jesus would be lying but without confirmation, statements from one source have to be considered as suspect. That is why there is a requirement in the Bible it says, "on the evidence of two or three witnesses a matter shall be confirmed" (Deuteronomy 19:15). Thus, when Boaz vowed to purchase the land of his dead relatives and take Ruth as his wife, he did so in front of witnesses. "Then Boaz said to the elders and all the people, "You are witnesses today that I have bought from the hand of Naomi all that belonged to Elimelech and all that belonged to Chilion and Mahlon. Moreover, I have acquired Ruth the Moabitess, the widow of Mahlon, to be my wife in order to raise up the name of the deceased on his inheritance, so that the name of the deceased will not be cut off from his brothers or from the court of his birth place; you are witnesses today." All the people who were in the court, and the elders, said, "We are witnesses" " (Ruth 4:9-11).

"Or if a person swears thoughtlessly with his lips to do evil or to do good, in whatever matter a man may speak thoughtlessly with an oath, and it is hidden from him, and then he comes to know it, he will be guilty in one of these. So it shall be when he becomes guilty in one of these, that he shall confess that in which he has sinned" (Leviticus 5:4-5).

"If a person swears thoughtlessly": A rash vow is a promise made without taking adequate time to think about the consequences of the vow. For example, "But when Herod's birthday came, the daughter of Herodias danced before them and pleased Herod, so much that he promised with an oath to give her whatever she asked. Having been prompted by her mother, she said, "Give me here on a platter the head of John the Baptist." Although he was grieved, the king commanded it to be given because of his oaths, and because of his dinner guests" (Matthew 14:6-9). Herod couldn't weasel out of his promise because it was witnessed by people he didn't want to think that he couldn't be trusted.

"to do evil": A vow to do evil is also a rash vow because a person is commanded not to sin, therefore promises to sin, even when witnessed, are not enforceable. God's laws trump a personal vow. Herod's vow should have been canceled because it became a promise to do evil. It wasn't his initial intention, but he didn't think it through.

"to do good": Here a person is promising to do what God has already commanded. It is a useless vow because a vow doesn't make God's commands more real. In fact, it is actually an insult to God because you are actually saying you'll only do things that you accept, making you a higher authority than God.

As I said, thoughts going through your head are not vows. There is no witness that it was promised. Often, people who compulsively think of vows often are not sure themselves whether they made a vow. They live in fear that they might have vowed something that they now need to keep. That uncertainty would not count as a witness to a vow.

I compulsively want to make vows

Jeffrey Hamilton — Sun, 17 Oct 2021 20:44:59 +0000

Question:

Hello,

I have a question about vows. For a year or so, when I become concerned that something I'm doing or might do is sinful, I suddenly start to think a vow to God that I won't do that thing. This happens with no time to think about the vow, about whether I want to make it or whether it's worded in a way that won't cause difficulties I haven't thought of yet. Sometimes I stop myself before I finish the thought, but other times I can't because it happens very quickly.

I have experienced some vow thoughts that I think are just intrusive thoughts that I have because I feel afraid I'll make a vow, but others feel more intentional. I think I make them because I feel so worried about sinning that I vow not to do the thing I'm worried about so the worried feeling will go away. However, I do not really want to make these vows except maybe for the quarter of a second initial reaction where I want to stop feeling anxious. If I had a moment to think and didn't have my brain continuing to try to think the vow even when I try not to make it (which often happens), I would never agree to any of these things.

I want to stop making these vows because keeping them is making my life very difficult, but I literally cannot stop. I also need to know if I am required to keep them. I am heavily restricted in what I can eat and wear because of them, and I cannot imagine living the rest of my life this way.

Please let me know if you can help me.

Answer:

A vow is more than a mere thought about promising something. It is a commitment that is witnessed by others. Thus, what you are describing is a temptation to make unnecessary vows. You are correctly realizing that making such vows is wrong. "But I say to you, make no oath at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, or by the earth, for it is the footstool of His feet, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great king. Nor shall you make an oath by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black. But let your statement be, 'Yes, yes' or 'No, no'; anything beyond these is of evil" (Matthew 5:34-37).

What you describe is a form of OCD. People suffering from OCD are trying to remove risks. I suspect that deep inside of you, you think that if you make a vow to God that this will make whatever you are facing to be certain. You worry about sinning so you imagine that if you vow to God not to sin, then you won't give in to the temptation. The problem is that such a vow is meaningless. God already commands us not to sin. A vow doesn't make a command more certain. In fact, when people do this, they are actually saying that God's commands are less important unless I promise to keep them -- then they are more important. Who then is in charge of your life and your decisions?

You can't stop temptation from happening. But you can continue to reject what you are being offered. Realize where the impulse is coming from and put your trust in God and not yourself.

Do I have to keep vows that I make because of my compulsive disorder?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Sat, 18 Apr 2020 16:55:41 +0000

Question:

Hi,

I would first like to mention that I often struggle with compulsive or intrusive thoughts. An issue that I've particularly been dealing with is a compulsion to condemn myself by making "deals" with God. These thoughts would often range from "If I do (random activity), then God please to that". Recently I was compelled to condemn myself by telling God in my mind that "I promise to do whatever if you permanently ban me from my hobby of being a car enthusiast," and "I promise to do this if you permanently ban me from enjoying the rewards of Heaven when I die." These really upset me because one is something that I am very passionate about and is very close to my heart, and the other pertains to what God has to offer in the next life. In doing this, have I completely lost my right to enjoy these things forever? Would God respond to such requests?

Answer:

What you are claiming is that men can bind God by their thoughts. There was a time when Moses really wanted God not to destroy the Israelites. "Then Moses returned to the LORD, and said, 'Alas, this people has committed a great sin, and they have made a god of gold for themselves. But now, if You will, forgive their sin -- and if not, please blot me out from Your book which You have written!'" (Exodus 32:31-32). God's answer was that it wasn't up to Moses to decide the criteria upon which he is saved. People are lost due to sin (Exodus 32:33).

Jesus said not to make vows (Matthew 5:34-37). Our word is enough. You can't bargain with God. You can ask God for mercy or favors, but it is completely up to God whether He decides to grant your request. Offering to give up something to get God to listen to you is just a rehash of an old idolatrous religion. Worshipers of Molech had the idea that the greater thing you gave up, the more likely Molech would grant your request. What you've been doing is treating God as if He was some idol to be manipulated.

I know you feel compulsions and these compulsions lead you to place yourself in situations where you can later condemn yourself. However, you don't have to give in to the temptations. Realize that God cannot be manipulated, no matter what you offer to sacrifice. God says He answers the prayers of those who do His will, not those to endure the most self-inflicted pain (I John 5:14-15). Therefore, stop making ridiculous promises that God isn't interested in and that you aren't able to keep. Start following God's laws, which includes not making promises. Apologize for making foolish vows and then move on with your life.

I compulsively wash my hands

Jeffrey Hamilton — Tue, 26 Jun 2018 00:59:00 +0000

Question:

Hi,

I am a very strong believer in Christ. He has my whole heart and soul. I have very strong faith in Him. I have seen miracles that He performs. I have severe OCD. It happens when I read the Bible, take communion, fast, and prayer. I get all these twisted thoughts in my mind. I know it's irrational, but I can't get it to go away. It creates fear. It's like OCD wants me to stay away from God. I will never do that, but my mind goes crazy when I do the above-mentioned. I immediately have to wash my hands, bathe, etc. to wash away the thought. It sounds crazy, but I can't control it. I know we cannot change anything by our thoughts; only God has the ability to do this. I need help, but I think mine is more spiritual. I know God will protect my family and not wash my hands, but I can't help it. I feel like this is a different type of OCD.

Please advise. Thank you.

Answer:

Actually, compulsive hand washing is a fairly common OCD trait. If you read the psychological papers on it, you'll find that it is treated as an unwanted habit. The first order is recognizing that it is a compulsive desire that serves no purpose. The physical washing of your hands does nothing about the thoughts you may be having. Like the Jewish rituals that Paul taught against, hand washing doesn't solve the problem, which leads to repeating the action. "These things indeed have an appearance of wisdom in self-imposed religion, false humility, and neglect of the body, but are of no value against the indulgence of the flesh" (Colossians 2:23).

Compulsive actions are not a result of reasoned thought but are emotional responses. Thus, you have to work to take your emotions out of the driver's seat. "He who trusts in his own heart is a fool, but whoever walks wisely will be delivered" (Proverbs 28:26). Therefore, the second step is to face what is triggering your compulsion and then purposely fight to not give in to the impulse. At first, all you might accomplish is delaying the compulsion, but over time you will be able to put it off indefinitely. Most people try to avoid the things that trigger the compulsion, but this also avoids solving the problem.

Approach the problem rationally. God commands that we read our Bibles, take communion, and pray. None of these things are wrong, so thoughts are wrong that interfere with doing these things or make us want to avoid them. "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight" (Proverbs 3:5-6). God doesn't tell us to do things that are bad for us.

Finally, break the habit. Find a place where it is not easy to wash your hands and sit there while you read your Bible or pray. Resist the urge to leave; instead, set a period of time where you will stay there. Each time you stay, it will become easier to stay longer.

I couldn’t stop myself and made a vow that God says I have to keep

Jeffrey Hamilton — Wed, 27 Dec 2017 03:10:00 +0000

Question:

Can I have your opinion about Ecclesiastes 5:4-7?

"When you make a vow to God, do not be late in paying it; for He takes no delight in fools. Pay what you vow! It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay. Do not let your speech cause you to sin and do not say in the presence of the messenger of God that it was a mistake. Why should God be angry on account of your voice and destroy the work of your hands? For in many dreams and in many words there is emptiness. Rather, fear God" (Ecclesiastes 5:4-7).

Doesn't "do not say in the presence of the Messenger of God that it was a mistake", either it is Jesus, a priest or an angel, that I can't be forgiven for my vows said out loud? One day, I broke and ended up promising out loud to God I will never play with my video games again. Right after, I think (I'm not sure about it), I said I was giving up another hobby too (nothing sinful). I can't live without the second hobby. It's really important for me, but I feel like all the verses are against me.

Please, can you help me?

Answer:

Notice what you are doing to yourself: you are finding ways to condemn yourself. No one requested that you give up playing your video games or doing your hobby. You picked these things because you like them, but for whatever reason, you don't think you should be happy. I wonder if you think the only way to be religious is to be miserable. Thus, you have a compulsion to "vow" to God to give up things that make you happy, and then it becomes God's fault that you are unhappy because you see it as God making you keep your word.

Passing thoughts are not vows.
Vows have a purpose, such as Jephthah wanting to thank God for helping him win a war. There is no purpose here, only compulsion. Self-imposed misery is not a purpose.
The vows are voluntary.
The vows were made to (or in the presence of) a representative of God -- not something said to yourself.

The first two verses establish the boundaries of the command: "When you make a vow to God, do not delay to pay it; for He has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you have vowed - better not to vow than to vow and not pay" (Ecclesiastes 5:4-5). Thus, this is a command about vows of payment to God. It refers back to a law given by Moses: "When you make a vow to the LORD your God, you shall not delay to pay it, for it would be sin in you, and the LORD your God will surely require it of you. However, if you refrain from vowing, it would not be sin in you. You shall be careful to perform what goes out from your lips, just as you have voluntarily vowed to the LORD your God, what you have promised" (Deuteronomy 23:21-23).

Notice that this does not match what you've been doing. Giving up things that make you happy is not a payment to God. God doesn't want or ask for your misery. Nor is what you are doing voluntarily. You are not engaged in this to make God happy, you are doing this solely to make yourself unhappy. "Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver" (II Corinthians 9:7). Notice that repeatedly it says, "better not to vow;" yet, you don't really consider the fact that you don't have to make these vows. You feel that you have to. You use this to trap yourself in misery.

These verses are more about someone in their joy wanting to thank God, such as an author vowing to give a quarter of the profits from his latest book to church. Such an offer is supposed to be seriously considered and not be something stated without thinking it through. The person must really want to do it, knowing he doesn't have to do it and knows he will be happy to keep that vow. Thus, using the author's example again, his book suddenly becomes a blockbuster and he finds he owes the Lord a million dollars. He doesn't change the terms of his vow just because it was more than he had originally projected. (Not that he is doing bad because he still is making more money than he originally projected as well.)

There is a strong temptation to alter the terms of vows when things go better than you dreamed or the amount is higher than you expected. It is easy to make claims before the deeds are done, but will those words have meaning? "Do not let your speech cause you to sin and do not say in the presence of the messenger of God that it was a mistake. Why should God be angry on account of your voice and destroy the work of your hands? For in many dreams and in many words there is emptiness. Rather, fear God" (Ecclesiastes 7:6-7). Thus, the warning is not to let greed get in your way of keeping your vows.

All aspects of Ecclesiastes 5:4-7 do not match what you are doing. It doesn't apply. God doesn't need or want you to be miserable.

Response:

Mr. Hamilton,

Thanks for your response. I particularly loved the verse at I Corinthian 9:7.

Have a good day.

Are vows made because of OCD compulsions to be kept?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Tue, 12 Dec 2017 02:28:00 +0000

Question:

Hello,

I have a question about OCD and the Bible. I have been a member of the church of Christ for about five years. I have been diagnosed with OCD and most of my issues revolve around my faith. I went for a few years undiagnosed and untreated because I didn't know what was wrong with me. I have recently reached out and gotten on medications and gone through cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Looking back on my behaviors, I noticed a trend in my thought process:

"If you aren't willing to kneel right now when you pray in public, that means you are ashamed and proud, and God won't listen to your prayer because you aren't willing."
"If you don't teach this person, you are ashamed of Jesus and proud like the Pharisees."
"If you aren't willing to do [this] then you will go to Hell because you value [this] over Heaven."
"If you don't give this person all of your money, then that means you are greedy and love money more than God, so you will go to Hell because your priorities aren't right."

And many other thoughts like these.

Basically, OCD has two driving factors: doubt and certainty. Someone will receive a doubt, seemingly out of nowhere, about something they care about and that will cause huge spikes in anxiety and fear/guilt (obsession). The untrained way to cope with that obsession is to perform an action to gain certainty about your doubt and alleviate the anxiety (compulsion). So, in my case I would get doubts about being willing to do something for God, I would know it isn't necessary, but there would be an intense doubt accompanied by anxiety, and I would perform an action to assure myself that I was willing to do the action and, therefore, alleviate the anxiety that came with the consequences of not being willing to do an action.

My specific question is this: During the time when I wasn't medicated or trained, I would get thoughts to make vows: "You could make this vow for God." "No, it is unnecessary and I don't want to." "You aren't willing to do [this] for God?" "Yes I am, but I don't have to and don't want to." "You must value [this] over Heaven then." Thus, I would make the vow to make myself feel better because I feared. Based on my understanding of God, these aren't really legitimate because I was only doing these actions to alleviate fear, doubt, and anxiety due to OCD. But I wanted a second opinion from someone who has dealt with people with OCD and is a Bible believer.

Thank you so much.

Answer:

I appreciate the observation regarding what is behind OCD. Your compulsions were more than assurance to yourself. Because they were rules of your own making, you ended up adding to God's Word. "Do not add to His words or He will reprove you, and you will be proved a liar" (Proverbs 30:6). I don't mention this to cause you further anxiety, but to point out that we must do (or not do) things based on what God actually said. Our own thoughts or personal challenges are inadequate. "I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me" (Galatians 2:20).

Therefore, vows made to yourself (or to God) because of compulsion are a violation of God's Word. They are not valid vows because they involve wrong (adding to God's Word). God does not accept vows to do wrong. See: Can you accidentally make a vow?

I am compulsively making vows in my mind. Do I have to keep them?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Wed, 26 Jul 2017 02:04:00 +0000

Question:

Hi,

I have been going through a time of struggles dealing with so many vows: some intentional and others intrusive or unintentional. I am sure this is greatly related to OCD, but sometimes it doesn't feel that way. For example, one time I was praying and an intrusive thought came in my head, "I'm not giving this (random hobby that I enjoy) up for You." This caused panic in my mind, so I quickly countered saying in my mind, "Yes, I do (give the random hobby up for God)." This caused even more panic and I kept repetitively telling God that I didn't mean it and that I don't want to give the hobby up.

I know in Ecclesiastes 5 it says to not call your vow a mistake before the messenger, but am I bound by this vow still?

Also, I have many other vows and I can't get my mind over them because they keep replaying in my mind: vows that I never wanted to make. The vows always relate to me giving something up that I don't want to give up. Also, I have vowed to do somethings that I like in order to prevent myself from vowing it away. For example, I vowed that I would continue doing the hobby to force myself to do it, but I just don't know what I should do. I've prayed about it, but I still have constant guilt no matter what I do.

Thank you.

Answer:

First off, intrusive thoughts don't count as vows. Vows are much more formal than a brief thought passing through someone's head. In particular, there are the ideas that it is spoken to someone and that it is bound by something. Your examples are not vows, but merely thoughts about making a vow that you rightly decided were not reasonable thoughts.

Jesus commands Christians not to make vows unless required by someone else. "But I say to you, make no oath at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, or by the earth, for it is the footstool of His feet, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. Nor shall you make an oath by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black. But let your statement be, 'Yes, yes' or 'No, no'; anything beyond these is of evil" (Matthew 5:34-37).

Under the Old Law, there was a provision for rash vows, but even here, it was an actual vow and not a passing thought. There can be times a person didn't realize he committed to something or perhaps forgot that he made a commitment. Under the Old Law, this was considered an unintentional sin. "Or if a person swears, speaking thoughtlessly with his lips to do evil or to do good, whatever it is that a man may pronounce by an oath, and he is unaware of it -- when he realizes it, then he shall be guilty in any of these matters" (Leviticus 5:4). When he realizes he had broken his word, he was to confess his sin and offer a sacrifice to God. There are no sacrifices under the New Law, but just as with any other sin, you confess your faults before God. "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (I John 1:9).

Basically, understand that you are facing a compulsion to condemn yourself and there is no reason for this.

Response:

Ok, thank you!

I’m having trouble not doing things I am unsure about

Jeffrey Hamilton — Sun, 31 Mar 2013 02:03:00 +0000

Question:

I am having trouble not doing things that I am unsure about whether or not they are sinful, such as drinking soda, eating sweets, masturbation, and whether or not I should be playing certain card and video games. On the soda and sweets, I am wondering if I am harming my body by doing so, and on the games, my worries range from should I be playing them at all to details such as whether or not the length of my character's hair matters or not. Oftentimes I authorize an action then once it is done think to myself that I shouldn't do that. I think that I often have trouble viewing doing something that I am not sure about as sin.

Do you have any insight on the topics I mentioned? And what should I do about the things that I am unsure of?

Also, I just want to thank you for being there to answer questions that people have.

Answer:

You are falling into what used to be scrupulosity. It is the old word for being OCD about religion. You found out that many things you never thought about before can be wrong and then you go to the other extreme and find faults under every rock. See Extremes.

What you are missing is that some things are wrong, not in themselves, but because of when they are done, how they are done, or how much they are done.

For example, sweets are not bad in small quantities. "My son, eat honey because it is good, And the honeycomb which is sweet to your taste" (Proverbs 24:13). But when over-consumed, problems arise. "It is not good to eat much honey; so to seek one's own glory is not glory" (Proverbs 25:27). Entertainment is the same way. Recreation is good for a person. All play and no work is bad for a person.

Sometimes when something is done makes a difference. "A time to weep, And a time to laugh; A time to mourn, And a time to dance" (Ecclesiastes 3:4). Fooling around with friends at a funeral would be bad timing. Deciding to bathe in a public park is the wrong place.

Sex is expected in marriage but becomes wrong before you are married (Hebrews 13:4). It is the same action and could be with the same person, but circumstances make a huge difference. Masturbating is not wrong in itself, but when you masturbate while looking at pornography or masturbate with some other person, then it becomes wrong.

Some things are wrong because of what they involve. A video game that features nudity or murder as a form of entertainment would be wrong because they are promoting immoral ideas. In the same way, dances that emphasis sensuality or sexual movements would be wrong because it stirs up lust.

Paul's comment about the length of hair means there should be a distinction between the sexes. The number of inches long your hair is given on purpose because people would focus on that and not the bigger issue. The real question is if someone just saw your hair, would they know you are male or female?

Response:

Thank you. The article on extremes was quite helpful.

I would like to encourage those who suffer from OCD-Religious or scrupulosity

Jeffrey Hamilton — Sun, 19 Aug 2012 02:46:00 +0000

Question:

Hi,

I've been poking around the Internet. I was actually trying to find an OCD support group online but without any luck.

However, I was fascinated to read the postings and questions of the individual with OCD-Religious or scrupulosity because I have gone through every single thing that individual has gone through, but I am more or less in "remission," or semi-remission. I still suffer a lot of symptoms but haven't had to worry about the possibility of losing salvation or blaspheming God. You know, the unpardonable sin part. I can't even bring myself to fully mention it right now. However, for a long time, I was scared sick about those things. But I have become "well" in regard to that problem, though the problem rears its ugly head once in a while.

I also understand the constant begging for reassurance and over-dependence on people for it -- and the fact that it tends to drive other people absolutely insane if you know what I mean. It occurs because people seem much more immediately available since you can't "see" God. Now I understand what a friend of mine was trying to say when he said to "practice the presence of God."

Obviously, it's probably not a good idea to ask you to give my e-mail address to the person because it might lead to an unhealthy dependence by him-her on me in my current strength (however temporary or permanent).

I would just so desperately want this person to know, however, "Friend - I know exactly what you are going through. I know everything you are going through. Because I have been through it all! Like me, your emotions scream at you so loudly that you cannot hear what the voice of reason is saying. And further, I want you to know, I inherited this exact same problem from my grandmother on my mom's side, and she feared the exact same things as you and I did or do. OCD has a strong link to genetic inheritance, just as most other mental illnesses do. Dear friend, what I say now will only reassure you for about five minutes if you are in the heat of an OCD battle because that's what the "monster" of OCD does; that's how it attacks. As soon as you get peace, there is something that comes along and steals it. Your soul screams for absolute certainty, and it is hard to find in this world. God and His Word is, I think, the only absolute certainty. As an OCD sufferer, you will naturally take things in the Bible out of context, which is the major contributor to your religious anxiety. You read something out of context and immediately assume it is condemning you. You must remember that CONTEXT IS KING, to turn a phrase -- just an expression -- you're probably thinking because I capitalized "king" that I'm detracting from God's Kingship, but I'm not -- see, I do know how you think because I have struggled with the "monster" of OCD for decades, like my grandmother before me. Friend, I know you are hurting and I'm very sorry for it and I truly sympathize with you. I have been occasionally helped by prescription tranquilizers. Be very careful of SSRIs or anti-depressants, however, because some of the side effects can truly be dangerous - be certain you see a psychiatrist about medications and be sure he absolutely rules out Bipolar disorder as a secondary illness or some medications will make you considerably worse. However, being on medication for a time might bring your anxiety down to a level where you can actually start to think more rationally. By the way, I am not currently on any medication at all. I took them for a season, maybe I will have to take them again, but I don't know. But I wish so desperately for you to find peace. I really believe God is in control. I do not believe He is the kind of God who gives you salvation one minute and snatches it away from the next. I do not believe the Bible teaches that God sets up His children for failure. I do not believe He saves His children knowing they will be damned later. It does not make sense for God to do this. He is an all-knowing, all-powerful God, so it does not make sense for Him to change His mind. He does not look at someone and say, 'saved today, damned tomorrow.' So relax my friend, for as long as you can (and expect you will one day struggle again, but we all struggle in one way or another. It is important to consider the entire counsel of God. It is hard to do because some verses are confusing! For now, it might help for you to focus on the book of Romans for a few days, especially Romans chapter 8. I also love what the Apostle Paul said in Romans chapter 7, that he found himself doing what he hated and found it really hard to do the righteous things he wanted to do.

I do, so desperately hope this letter is published where you can read it, my fellow OCD friend, in the hopes that you will be comforted with the same comfort that I believe God has given me. Be patient in affliction my friend. God loves you. He is not out to get you. He is out to seek you and find you. It sounds to me like He has already found you but that you keep forgetting that.

I hope you have a family member or dear friend in your life who will love you through your struggles.

Satan knows you have OCD and he will beat you over the head with it as often as possible, but he cannot steal the saved soul from God. God is the Creator and what He says is what is. I can tell you what your next thought is going to be right now: "Well, Satan can't steal the saved soul from God, but what if I was never really saved and just thought I was?" My friend, when will this questioning ever end? OCD is endless doubt. God knows you are miserable. He does not want His children to live in endless doubt. I bet one of your parents was a perfectionist and judging and you could never do anything right in that person's eyes. But God justifies those who believe Him and walk with Him. Just seek Him, my friend. Seek the relationship. As the minister said, pray about true needs and pour out your heart to Him. Hey man, believe me, you won't feel as though He will answer you sometimes, but just make the decision to put everything in His hands. And don't beat yourself up if it takes you some time to learn how to do this.

Answer:

I purposely don't keep records of past questions, so I don't have a way of sending your note to the person, but I posted your note. Perhaps he, or others who suffer from scrupulosity, will benefit from your encouragement.

Response:

Thank you very much, Mr. Hamilton. I should have said something about the spiritual aspect of the struggle, but I wrote in the middle of the night and was, perhaps, not as thorough as I would have liked; plus my wife reminded me of some additional things. But I appreciate that you posted this and do hope it will be of comfort to someone.