Question:

Can you plan to get pregnant off of pre-nut? When my boyfriend and I have sex, he pulls it out then puts it back in without wiping. He just found out that you could get pregnant off of it, so he`s telling me that I should have been pregnant because of how many times he pre-nut in me. I'm like you can't get pregnant off of pre-nut. I mean you could but getting pregnant off of pre-nut is a mistake waiting to happen.


Answer:

The use of slang is so thick in your note, I hope I understood what you are asking well enough to answer.

Let's start with some facts. A couple wanting to have a child have an 85% chance of conceiving a child in one year. In other words if 100 couples were having sex, then by the end of one year about 85 of them would find themselves expecting a child.

What you and your boyfriend are doing is practicing the withdrawal method of avoiding pregnancy. By this method, a man removes his penis prior to ejaculation. Such a method has been documented to be change the odds of becoming pregnant in one year down to 19%; that is, if 100 couples used the withdrawal method for a year, at the end of the year, 19 of them would find themselves pregnant anyway.

The reason it is not 0% is two fold. Men produce a pre-ejaculate fluid (what you are calling pre-nut, but what is more commonly called pre-cum) that cleanses their urethra before ejaculation. That fluid can contain sperm. Not nearly the amount of sperm found in semen, but still some none-the-less. It only takes one sperm reaching your egg on the proper day to cause a conception. Why hasn't it happened yet? Basically, it is pure chance. Just as there are odds saying you can be struck by lightening. Because you walked through the rain in a lightening storm and haven't been struck, it doesn't mean it won't ever happen. The odds that it might still remain. Each time you have sex with your boyfriend, the odd remains that this time you might become pregnant.

The second reason the withdrawal method is not 0% is that couples try to extend the pleasure of sex as long as possible. Every once in a while, they accidentally go too long and the man ejaculates semen inside instead of outside. Again, just because it hasn't happened in the past, it is no guarantee that it won't happen in the future.

But if your goal is to avoid pregnancy, your boyfriend is raising the possibility by leaving some of his semen on his penis after withdrawing. I don't have studies to quote as how far this will raise the odds of conception, but it still exists.

Now, I have a question for you. Why are you having sex with a man who is not committed to you? Oh, I'm sure he says he loves you, but the fact remains he doesn't love you enough to commit the rest of his life to you and your children. Men like that generally walk away when life gets tough. They only stay when things are easy and they can get free sex without paying a prostitute. Men like that are rarely faithful to one woman. While you are trying to avoid pregnancy, you are fully exposed to sexually transmitted diseases. "Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding; he who does so destroys his own soul. Wounds and dishonor he will get, and his reproach will not be wiped away" (Proverbs 6:32-33). "Wounds" refers to diseases passed on by sex.

To put it bluntly, what you are doing is committing the sin of fornication. Fornication is an old word that means sex outside the bounds of marriage. "Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God" (I Corinthians 6:9-10). Paul is not saying "maybe" or "possibly," he says it will not happen if you remain unrepentant in your sin. "I tell you, no; but unless you repent you will all likewise perish" (Luke 13:3).

You're fooling yourself if you think that you are being good by only avoiding conceiving a child. Yes, you are being nice to the potential child by not bringing him into the world without a committed father, but you are throwing away heaven for mere moments of pleasure -- pleasure that could have been had in marriage without jeopardizing your soul. "Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's" (I Corinthians 6:18-20).