Question:

Question

Answer:

I was recently asked to preform a wedding. I really prefer to let others attend to weddings.  What are your thoughts?


Weddings are not a function of the church, but I consider them an opportunity to teach the gospel. Marriages are sanctioned by God (Matthew 19: 4-6), so I am willing to encourage people to get married for the right purpose and with the right goals in mind.

When someone calls, I ask them if either of them have been previously married. If they have, I apologized for being nosy, but I have restrictions on who I may marry (Matthew 19:9). I then ask why the prior marriages ended. I would guess that by this time 80% of those requesting my service are no longer interested. Of those remaining I explain that I do weddings solely as a community service. There is no fee, but I do ask that the couple take time to study about marriage with me from a biblical viewpoint. (My classes take about 9 to 12 hours in total.) This usually elimiates another large portion of my callers.

Those that remain (usually 1 or 2 a year) have been a joy to teach. I cover a lot of ground, and often I have to tackle difficult things, such as why sex outside of marriage is wrong. Yet, such are opportunities to discuss the nature of sin and what must be done to remedy sin. I even incorporate such into my short lesson that give during wedding -- it never fails to cause a gasp when you explain that the couple realized that their living together outside of marriage was a sin and that this is one step in remedying that wrong.

"For though I am free from all men, I have made myself a servant to all, that I might win the more; and to the Jews I became as a Jew, that I might win Jews; to those who are under the law, as under the law, that I might win those who are under the law; to those who are without law, as without law (not being without law toward God, but under law toward Christ), that I might win those who are without law; to the weak I became as weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all men, that I might by all means save some." (I Corinthians 9:19-22).

March 15, 2005