I read what you wrote about Timothy 2:9. I go to church, but I am a person who does not wear make-up and the only jewelry I have is my wedding ring. I went to church in a pair of slacks that were black, dress shoes and a sweater. When the church had testimony someone stood up and said she did not understand why people did not come to church wearing dresses and looking their best. She told us about the hats and how people used to dress in the past. (She said a lot more.) I know this comment was made to me because she always points out my wrongs, (and I was not in a dress). I have not been going to church for very long, but I have been reading the Bible for myself. I am not a flashy person. I am very plain. Was I wrong and not in modest apparel according to Timothy?
Please see the article "Dress Codes," which addresses most of your concerns. Too often people insist on enforcing their standards instead of researching what God has said concerning a matter. What you describe sounds as if your attire was modest, proper, and moderate as defined by today's standards in the United States.
I can understand your discomfort, but the writer of Proverbs recommends, "The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger, and his glory is to overlook a transgression" (Proverbs 19:11). If I may be so bold, it would be best not to take this woman's remarks personally. The problem is not that she doesn't like your selection of clothing or that you were personally offended. The danger is the attempt to create rules where God has made none. Such has a potential to keep a person out of heaven. The proper response would be to invite her over one day for tea or coffee and calmly discuss the Scriptures. What verse is her view based upon? Has she considered passages such as James 2? If she agrees that perhaps the Bible doesn't directly state what she believes, does she understand why it is wrong to bind personal opinions on others? It is likely she may not listen, but a gentle approach has a chance of reaching her (II Timothy 2:23-26).